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miller3 · May 6, 2008, 07:11 AM

Ok, it has been over a week since I last talked to my ex. Long story short, she broke it off after 2 years and being engaged because (1 of many reasons) initially she was not happy. We have been through a lot these last few months with issues with her mom. Her mom does not like me her reason is " they do not know me" and " i never tried to get to know her" anyway her mom is remarried and so is her dad. I got along well with her dad. She has been acting weird the last few days of us being together. We did'nt see each other much and did'nt talk on the phone much, a lot had to do with I just have been very busy with work and so has she.

Anyway it should not mean much because we live 4 hours away and we were looking for a house for me to move up there. She one day just went nuts on me and said she needed a break and 2 weeks later she then ended it saying she loves me but it will just not work. We have been though a lot but it seemed she had enough and was not happy. I then tried to plead with her and try to see her bit nothing helped. 2 months went by of me chasing her and us talking somewhat on the phone once a week and a few e-mails and there. She recently I thought started to come around she was being nice to me and was showinh that she cared for me. I talked to her last 1 week ago on the phone and asked if she loves me and she said she does not know. I said then why are you talking to me and she said because she cares for me. I then started to talk about us hanging out and being friends and talking and she basically got frustrated and changed her mood and then said she had to go and she would call me. That was a week ago.

I refuse to bother her because when I do her reason for us breaking up changes everyday and it seems she does not know what to do. She said too much has happened in our relationship and that she is happier without me and does not need me in her life. She said she talks to me because she feels bad for hurting me. I don't believe her because when I asked her to give me time with her to han out and told her the dates we could she said " i am not giving you every week" I think the NC is the best right now but I do not want to loose her. How long do I let things go? Or do I wait for her call? What's my best option on were I stand now? I feel like people are in her ear to not be with me and that it will not work and she is believing them. She seems very confused when I talk to her at times then other times she is nice to me. If she wanted it to be over and for me to dispaear then why is she talking to me?

Romefalls19 · May 6, 2008, 07:49 AM

Your best option is to continue with NC but not for the reason you're doing it. You are doing NC to get her back, NC is to heal nothing more nothing less. Put this girl behind you as she has put you behind her. It sucks to hear, but you need to hear it. Let her go, whatever you two may have had is gone, it's the past. You really want to keep waiting around for something that won't come back around? As my dad always told me after a break up.. Man up and move on, it's better for yourself

miller3 · May 6, 2008, 07:57 AM

Yes very true, were you been romefalls? I agree the NC is the best option for now. Why do I keep getting different reason to why she does not think we will work every time we talk? Confused? Or making excuses? I mean it seems her feelings are deminishing for me but I am to blame because I was bothering her to come back in the beginning and not letting time go by for her to miss me and think because I feel that is what is going on that she does not miss us or me. Why is that?

Romefalls19 · May 6, 2008, 08:04 AM

You could spend all day scratching your head about why she is giving you different answers. I went through that phase you are going through and it just delays the healing process. My ex broke up with me over jealousy and possessiveness, so I went out and got a lot of help, I mean counseling, books and courses and still was told other things. It's not worth it man, it will only cause you more sleepless nights

miller3 · May 6, 2008, 08:05 AM

Did I send you my personal e-mail address? Check your profile!

Romefalls19 · May 6, 2008, 08:09 AM

I haven't gotten anything in my messages yet

miller3 · May 6, 2008, 08:16 AM

Check your profile I sent it to you.

Romefalls19 · May 6, 2008, 08:19 AM

Sent buddy

talaniman · May 6, 2008, 08:42 AM

Let us know when you do real No Contact, and not your own version. Until you do it right, you will stay confused, and reaching for straws to explain your confusion. She doesn't appear confused at all. When will you realize she is putting you off as nicely as she can. She is waiting for you to get it. Strangely you see this as caring. She does, but not nearly enough to take you back.

miller3 · May 6, 2008, 08:53 AM

I have not talked to her in any way for over a week. Like I said she is confused because her reasons change and on top of that she has told me she is confused.

talaniman · May 6, 2008, 09:34 AM

Originally Posted by miller3

I have not talked to her in any way for over a week. Like i said she is confused because her reasons change and on top of that she has told me she is confused.

They always say that when they dump us. Read some of the stories here for yourself.