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-   -   Teacher-student (corporal punishment) (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=718144)

  • Nov 20, 2012, 09:47 AM
    millat hossain
    Teacher-student (corporal punishment)
    Assalamu alaikum, its millat. Its my 1st time. So mistakes are probable, I ask for your forgiveness in advance. Well, now my Q. To what extent is a teacher allowed to punish his naughty, disobedient, or ill mannered student physically e.g. beating or slapping? Jazakallahu khair. millat hossain
  • Nov 20, 2012, 10:24 AM
    Curlyben
    Really depends on your location, but corporeal punishment, i.e. striking, has been BANNED in most educational establishments and countries.
  • Dec 11, 2012, 03:15 AM
    Silver Lining
    A child is considered to be the incarnation of God and hence, no corporal punishment is acceptable.
  • Dec 11, 2012, 07:52 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Silver Lining View Post
    A child is considered to be the incarnation of God and hence, no corporal punishment is acceptable.

    From the bible, spare the rod and spoil the child, in Christianity, corporal punishment is not only acceptable but recommended.

    But in schools, it will depend on what country, it is still used in some places.
  • Dec 11, 2012, 07:55 AM
    J_9
    In my country, if you lay your hand on my child you will have to answer to me! Not your God or your Allah... ME!
  • Dec 11, 2012, 08:06 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    From the bible, spare the rod and spoil the child

    No, this is not from the Bible.

    From Wiktionary --

    This phrase is from a 17th century poem by Samuel Butler called “Hudibras”. In the poem, a love affair is likened to a child, and spanking is commended as a way to make the love grow stronger. The actual verse reads:

    "What medicine else can cure the fits
    Of lovers when they lose their wits?
    Love is a boy by poets styled
    Then spare the rod and spoil the child."
  • Dec 11, 2012, 08:24 AM
    J_9
    Quote:

    in Christianity, corporal punishment is not only acceptable but recommended.
    Maybe in your Christianity, but not mine! Oh how this makes my blood pressure rise!
  • Dec 11, 2012, 08:39 AM
    J_9
    I have only raised my hand to any of my 4 children on a minimal amount of occasions. I have 2 Iraqi war veterans, a child with a 4.0 GPA in college and a 10 year old on the honor roll at school. I have found that talking and reasoning with the child so much more effective than fear. Children should never fear their elders, but rather communicate with them on a level that is equivalent to the age of the child.

    With proper communication, such as in any relationship, there is a better understanding of right and wrong.

    Chuck, if it's okay to beat your kid because they are not behaving in a manner that is not appropriate to you, would it be appropriate to beat your wife because she does not agree with you? Communication is the key to any relationship, be it the parent/child, spouse vs. spouse, or the teacher vs. student.
  • Dec 11, 2012, 08:51 AM
    Alty
    I agree with J9. If you so much as lay a finger on my child you better be prepared to meet God in person.

    I know that some countries still allow children to be abused by their teachers, but for anyone to think this is okay, or acceptable, is just ludicrous.
  • Dec 11, 2012, 09:56 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    Chuck, if it's okay to beat your kid because they are not behaving in a manner that is not appropriate to you, would it be appropriate to beat your wife because she does not agree with you? Communication is the key to any relationship, be it the parent/child, spouse vs. spouse, or the teacher vs. student.

    And with smaller children -- and even older ones, rather than a solid wallop on the backside, the parent's moving his or her body to interact with the child, move him to a safer place, etc. is much more effective. Of course, that means Dad and Mom (or Teacher) have to get off their lazy butts...
  • Dec 12, 2012, 04:59 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    Spanking a child ( not beating or abuse) is a wonderful punishment and one that is gravely missed in most of society in the too liberal world. That alone is a major problem with society and why children have as many issues as they do.

    And yes Christians must believe this, because it is in the bible and the word of God.
  • Dec 12, 2012, 08:52 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    And yes Christians must believe this, because it is in the bible and the word of God.

    No, as much as I love you, this is just not true.
  • Dec 12, 2012, 08:56 AM
    J_9
    This is where I have to agree to disagree. While I do believe in spanking when it necessary, in the case of danger for instance, I believe it is best to talk to/with the child so that they understand what they did was wrong and why.

    Yes, I have spanked my children when it came down to dangerous situations, but other than that there is nothing wrong with a discussion as to how and/or why their behavior is inappropriate.
  • Dec 12, 2012, 01:03 PM
    Alty
    I have to add to what J9 said. I have also spanked my children, but believe that talking is always the first step. If they don't learn from that then the punishment escalates. Spanking is always the last resort.

    Having said that, I'm the parent. If I choose to spank my children when they're misbehaving, then that's my right. But a teacher? A teacher has absolutely no right whatsoever to lay his/her hands on my child! Ever! I don't care if that teacher is Christian, Muslim, Jewish, or God himself!
  • Dec 16, 2012, 06:15 AM
    Silver Lining
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    From the bible, spare the rod and spoil the child, in Christianity, corporal punishment is not only acceptable but recommended.

    But in schools, it will depend on what country, it is still used in some places.

    Depends on how u interpret...

    What it really means is, if one does not discipline a child he or she will never learn obedience,, doesn't mean corporal punishment is acceptable n recommended

    I'd take it the positive way,,

    Spare the Rod and Spoil The Child,,

    I'd take it as Save the rod for something else, and pamper the child so much that u spoil the child with love,,
  • Dec 16, 2012, 08:15 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Silver Lining View Post
    Spare the Rod and Spoil The Child,,,

    I'd take it as Save the rod for something else, and pamper the child so much that u spoil the child with love,,,

    As I said earlier in this thread. "Spare the rod and spoil the child" is NOT found in the Bible.
  • Dec 16, 2012, 08:22 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    I have to add to what J9 said. I have also spanked my children, but believe that talking is always the first step. If they don't learn from that then the punishment escalates. Spanking is always the last resort.

    Even before talking, when a child is very small and headed toward the street or toward a family heirloom, a swat on the behind and a sharp NO might deter him for the next time, but the parent has to actually get off his chair and remove that child from danger or mayhem or mischief -- I probably lost all my baby weight just being aware of where the child was and picking up/moving him rather than shouting NO from my recliner or hoping repeated spankings taught him something.
  • Dec 16, 2012, 12:01 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Even before talking, when a child is very small and headed toward the street or toward a family heirloom, a swat on the behind and a sharp NO might deter him for the next time, but the parent has to actually get off his chair and remove that child from danger or mayhem or mischief -- I probably lost all my baby weight just being aware of where the child was and picking up/moving him rather than shouting NO from my recliner or hoping repeated spankings taught him something.

    I completely agree.

    I can count on one hand the number of times I've actually spanked my kids. Both kids. One hand, and I have fingers left over.

    Jared got his first spank when he was around 2, almost 3. We were in the front yard, I was weeding, he was playing. I had spent a lot of time teaching Jared that the boundary lines are the yard, to the sidewalk. The street is off limits.

    Well, on that day I was weeding, and Jared was playing with a ball. The ball rolled onto the street and Jared ran after it. We live in a cul-de-sac, not many cars going by, but as luck would have it, as Jared ran after his ball, and my back was turned for a second (a second is all it takes) my neighbor was pulling into our cul-de-sac. Thankfully she saw Jared, and stopped.

    I was shaken to the core. At that point I have to say, I spanked him because I really wanted him to never ever ever forget. I also spanked him because of my fear. I could have lost him!

    Around an hour later, when my heart rate went back to normal, and I thought about it, I felt horrible. I sat my little boy down, and I apologized to him. I told him that I spanked him because I was so afraid. I spanked him because I could have lost him.

    Of course he didn't understand what I was saying at that time, but he's now 14, and he remembers that day. He also understands, now, why I did it.

    He reached that understanding this summer, when we were walking our dogs, Chewy and Rascal. Rascal was still a very small puppy. Chewy a beagle, 3 at the time, was pulling like he always does. Well, the leash broke. It snapped in two. Chewy took off running, Jared and Sydney running after him. Chewy ran into the street, a busy street. Sydney was about to run after him, and Jared stopped her.

    Obviously it all ended well, we caught Chewy, and everyone was okay. But afterwards Jared said to me "That was the scariest thing ever. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't stop Chewy, I almost couldn't stop Sydney. They both could have been killed! I was so scared". I asked him "didn't you want to smack them both on the butt so they'd learn to never do it again? Not because you were angry, but because they scared you that much." He said yes, and that's when he understood. :)
  • Dec 16, 2012, 10:01 PM
    Silver Lining
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    As I said earlier in this thread. "Spare the rod and spoil the child" is NOT found in the Bible.

    Hey Wondergirl,

    I read your previous post and yet replied since SOME insist that the phrase is from the bible,, if THEY believe it is indeed from the bible, then I feel they are reading the Bible upside down because no word of God (Bhagavad Geeta, Bible, Quran etc) says that one should hurt a child to take the child in the right path,, It is people who read it and interpret the wrong way and also teach the wrong methods who need to understand their mistake,,
  • Dec 16, 2012, 10:06 PM
    Wondergirl
    That phrase is not in the Bible. It is from a secular poem.

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