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kaitrose · Oct 14, 2012, 11:28 PM

I've worked with this guy for two years now and lately (past six months or so) I've developed quite a crush on him. We have a mutual guy friend and he's who I usually go to for guy stuff. I just can't with this because the kid I have a crush on is my advice givers best friend.. Anyway, I told the mutual friend that I like my co-worker, his best friend, and he said he'd let him know if I wanted. Well, I didn't have the guts to tell him myself so I told him to fill him in. He did and my co-worker knew I had a crush on him for a few weeks before he said anything to me. When he did say something(we were working at the time), it went a little like this: "Hey, so mutual friend told me you like me." I blushed and nodded. "Oh he did?" "Yeah he did." "Yeah...I do." End of story. We continued to work. Then later he picked it back up: "I don't know if I want a relationship.." "oh yeah. Totally. I get it." "I..I might be dtf though." Holy crap! I about died. I just nodded and said okay. He asked me to hang out sometime and I said sure. Well weeks passed and nothing happened. We didn't hang out. Nada. Well just the other night he asked me again if I was dtf. I told him I wasn't sure. He then told me that his parents were going to be out of town and that I could come over. I was very hesitant but I accepted the offer because he said other people were going to be there too. Well he never called so we didn't hang out. So I guess the question in all of this is, would it be awkward to work with him if we did hook up? He's a very chill guy and I can play it cool but.. I don't know if I play it cool everyday. And would it be awkward during the act? Haha Do guys talk about their hook ups like girls? Help. Please. Anything will do. (Perferrably guys answer.)

joypulv · Oct 15, 2012, 05:44 AM

UGH. Don't go, don't have any more to do with him, lose the crush. He doesn't like you. He's trying to see if he can get some free easy sex.

Oh - and yes, guys do talk about their sexual conquests. They can be worse than women, especially when love isn't involved.

Maybe he has something of a heart and moral compass by not following through, knowing you have a crush and he doesn't.

DTF? Ugh, what is this world coming to.

kaitrose · Oct 15, 2012, 04:56 PM

I didn't go. He knows that I'm not "free easy sex" I have told him that I'm not looking for that. We've hung out before, just the two of us and things were fine. He didn't know about the crush at the time, but he still never tried anything.

Originally Posted by joypulv

UGH. Don't go, don't have any more to do with him, lose the crush. He doesn't like you. He's trying to see if he can get some free easy sex.

Oh - and yes, guys do talk about their sexual conquests. They can be worse than women, especially when love isn't involved.

Maybe he has something of a heart and moral compass by not following through, knowing you have a crush and he doesn't.

DTF? Ugh, what is this world coming to.

Emily Rae · Oct 15, 2012, 05:45 PM

Guy sounds like he's going to use you when he needs it. I would move on from that crush.. anyone who says "I might be DTF though" has just proven they don't care about you. Working will be fine if nothing happens and if it does it is up to you & him to continue a 'co-worker relationship'. I wouldn't go there, but it's up to you.

Emily Rae

kaitrose · Oct 15, 2012, 06:09 PM

Yeah. I understand that he wants sex. I mean, he spelled it out pretty clear for me. He flirts like crazy but has never tried anything. He seems like he'd be too shy to actually go through with it. Haha

Originally Posted by Emily Rae

Guy sounds like he's going to use you when he needs it. I would move on from that crush..anyone who says "I might be DTF though" has just proven they don't care about you. Working will be fine if nothing happens and if it does it is up to you & him to continue a 'co-worker relationship'. I wouldn't go there, but it's up to you.

Emily Rae

joypulv · Oct 17, 2012, 03:26 PM

You know, in some ways this is just very funny - here I am, 65 years old and revolted by DTF. Yet in the end you are cautious, and he is perhaps all macho bluff and equally cautious. So not much has changed over the years after all.
Maybe he's actually a nice guy!
Just take it slow - work is a dangerous place to start a relationship because of what happens if you have a fight or break up.

kaitrose · Oct 20, 2012, 12:21 AM

I myself am pretty revolted by dtf. Haha. He's not "macho buff" just average I guess. That's why I was so shocked when he asked me!
But thank you. I agree, work is a danger zone for romance. Nothing has happened and I'm almost positive nothing will.

Originally Posted by joypulv

You know, in some ways this is just very funny - here I am, 65 years old and revolted by DTF. Yet in the end you are cautious, and he is perhaps all macho bluff and equally cautious. So not much has changed over the years after all.
Maybe he's actually a nice guy!
Just take it slow - work is a dangerous place to start a relationship because of what happens if you have a fight or break up.