[richard_rv]

Hey there,
I've been dating a girl for a month, and recently I asked her out, but the big thing is that she has a really bad trust issue, because she was cheated on in the past she finds it hard to trust me, which I fully understand.

But these mood swings are really starting to bug me, and I said to her I know that she is going to go through these mood swings, and that's something that I will put up with.

But its starting to really bug me , I want to know how to make it so much easier, Thanks
Richard

[ironhide262]

Well, you're dating a girl with a "really bad trust issue" and only have been dating a month.

As long as you're not giving her any reason to view you as a distrustful person there really is not much you can do. You got some flags here dude... she's has issues, hers not yours and she's the only one who can work towards fixing them. But, hey, this is why we date right? To get to know someone a bit better, mutual , compatibility, etc..

Again, you've only been dating a month... and you're putting up with all kinds of crap?! I suggest you leave this girl alone and let her work on her issues... it sucks but, lots of other girls out there to date and many of them don't have "mood swings".

[talaniman]

Usually the first few months or so are just a feeling out period, to have fun finding out about each other. That's how you get comfortable. But if she already has issues and ways that bug you, that is something to pay attention to.

I think its easier if you lowered your expectations, and not have notions on how this should be so soon into this. Maybe you may be moving to fast, and missing something you would need to know.

Paying attention and be aware of the adjustments you may have to make would make it easier, and a lot more fun. For whatever reason, consider maybe she is annoyed with you also.

Hard to tell in just a month, but never assume her feelings for you, are the same as the ones you have for her.

Its dating guy, not a life commitment.

[richard_rv]

Thanks for your answers guys I really am grateful I'm mean think I am confussed swell because at the beginning of this year I split with a 2 year relationship and we were both virgins but this girl I'm now dating has slept with like 7 or 8 and she says all of them but 2 have been from relationships and she says she has always been cheated and that being the thing with her trust issues and to get it on in the sack I am nervous about it

[talaniman]

She is more experienced, which don't sound as if they were all that great at all, than you are, so are you insecure about it? Or are you a bit worried that she will see you as she sees the others before you? Or do you see a sexual encounter as a commitment? I think she does, and I don't see you ready for that.

For sure it will intensify the good feelings of attractions between you, but when the lust fades, the moment of truth will have arrived. Likely one of you will expect more from the other. Good sex, makes the flaws less visible, for a while. But if there is nothing there besides lust, you can bet those flaws, if they annoy you now, will drive you nuts later.

Its easy to get into these things, but so hard to get out. And since you are already annoyed at some of her ways, you better think twice before you bring sex into this equation.

You sound like a good guy, and its better to step back and see what you are getting into before you jump into something that's more complicated than it seems.

Think with the big head guy, because the little head NEVER thinks, it just acts. Fact is I don't think you are all that comfortable with her and should back up, or slow down. I think there is a lot more to her that you don't know but need to.

When a female goes through many, she is looking for the one that stays. I doubt that's you. Not still fairly fresh from a long term relationship. At least slow down and honestly see if this is love, lust, or a training encounter by a more experienced female.

She may just want what she wants because she wants it. What do you expect from this? What do you want from her? You do not know if she deserves your heart, nor knows what to do with it.

Sounds all about lust to me.

[mmresd]

You are going to have to put up with it if you want to stay together. Is going to take sometime, if it takes too long maybe some counseling would be a good idea. If she is scarred, only a professional can work on disappearing that wound, either that or A LOT of time. It depends on how long you are willing to wait.

[richard_rv]

It's probably abit of both to be honest we haven't had intercourse only foreplay.. Well it might of gone to intercourse if I was able to get an erection but I didn't for some reason , I think I should just take things slowly and see how things go and I have promised myself to take it easy and not rush into the relationship and anything sexaul either , I'd just like a nice girl who likes me for who I am , but I'm going to take this slow and not get to serious just for now , I'm overwhelmed by the answers ! Nice one cheers fella's

[talaniman]

Get a check up, just in case. Doctors can be crucial for good sexual health.