She still doesn't know what she wants.

vanheart · Nov 24, 2009, 07:51 PM

Exactly.
Don't worry about the 3%. Not great odds. Just time wasting. False hope.

Hopefully your next relationship will be 1000% Someone who is "ready"

Instead of trying to change someone or wait until they change, change yourself.

Oh, BTW, did I forget to mention to go NC forever..

lonelyman123 · Nov 24, 2009, 08:42 PM

Does nobody on here think that love is worth fighting for?

I wish · Nov 24, 2009, 08:58 PM

Love is worth fighting for if the other person feels the same way about you.

Love is worth fighting for if both of you are willing to put the same effort.

HeartTrips · Nov 24, 2009, 09:00 PM

You we believe love is worth fighting for so fight for it but fight for it correctly... realize its over now... and if this girl comes back... it will be a new relationship... what she is out there looking for right now... as you should... focus on only yourself... dont talk to her for a month or two... if you love her or she loves you... you guys will do that... going no contact and moving on is the only way you will win the fight for love...

lonelyman123 · Nov 24, 2009, 09:01 PM

I believe that she does feel the same way and is willing to put in the effort

We were nc for about a month then she contacted me and wanted to get together to talk

bswc · Nov 25, 2009, 06:54 AM

Ask her what is the topic about. Can you take it? Will it bring any good? 1 month is too short..
I took a talk with my ex when I was confused, I screwed myself pretty bad being desperate.

lonelyman123 · Nov 25, 2009, 04:59 PM

The holidays are going to be so hard

vanheart · Nov 25, 2009, 10:25 PM

"I believe that she does feel the same way and is willing to put in the effort"

Thats in your head. You can NEVER project others feelings.

The holidays are going to be so hard

As hard as you make them. Have fun instead.

Stay NC, be strong. Suck it up. Rebuilt who you are.
It isn't easy, but focus on what's really important, you.

That's the only way.

lonelyman123 · Nov 26, 2009, 07:50 PM

The hard part is I don't think ill ever find another woman :(

I wish · Nov 26, 2009, 08:19 PM

Originally Posted by lonelyman123

the hard part is i dont think ill ever find another woman :(

You really need to give yourself more time to recover. All break ups are difficult and we sometimes feel at an all-time low. But it will get easier. You need to be patient.

I wish that there was a magic potion too. But there isn't. Time is the key to healing.

jmw0713 · Nov 27, 2009, 07:34 AM

You will find another woman. Maybe not right away, but you will. They will be better than the last girl.

lonelyman123 · Nov 27, 2009, 07:43 PM

It will be hard to be better then the last one she was amazing

talaniman · Nov 27, 2009, 08:06 PM

Aw, geez guy, we know your heart is broken, but most people go through this same experience, and get beyond it, and have big fun, because we start to see how many females there really is when you stop focusing on just one. They are all fantastic in their own way, and in time you will find that out too.

vanheart · Nov 27, 2009, 10:57 PM

Yes, big fun!

Maybe the past was amazing, but getting dumped isn't amazing.

But enlightening...

The one you should focus on is you. Then who's right.

amicon · Nov 28, 2009, 12:11 AM

Look after yourself and heal from this, when you're ready somebody even more amazing will come into your life.

lonelyman123 · Nov 28, 2009, 07:08 AM

Are you guys saying nobody ever gets back together?

talaniman · Nov 28, 2009, 07:19 AM

If that's what they both want, its possible, but most people just get NEW partners.

Matter of fact, most people when they get dumped and heal from the break up, find better partners than the last one, and seldom want the exes back. Weird huh!

lonelyman123 · Nov 28, 2009, 07:21 AM

How do you know if that's what they both want?

I wish · Nov 28, 2009, 07:30 AM

Originally Posted by lonelyman123

how do you know if thats what they both want?

1) You already know what you want.

2) If the other person wanted to same thing, they will let you know.

If they don't tell you anything, it means they don't want the same thing.

You can't force two people to get back together. It will happen naturally. You don't need to search for it. It will come to you if it was going to happen.

Be patient with yourself. Right now you're desperately looking for signs that would be in your favor. You're in a tough situation, but you will get through it.

Focus on healing from your pains first before worrying about getting back together. Once you've healed from your pains, you will be in a better position to analyze the situation.

talaniman · Nov 28, 2009, 07:44 AM

Originally Posted by lonelyman123

how do you know if thats what they both want?

That's simple, they will be together.

Add your answer here.