[HellHound82]

OK, I met the girl of my dreams about 8 months ago, problem was she was already with another guy. After a few days of talking to her I admitted to her that I loved her and she said she felt the same way. She left her boyfriend, who in my opinion cares more about WOW than he does for her, and we started dating. After about a month she tells me that she is in love with both of us and feels bad about leaving him the way she did, sho she dumped me to go back to him. Now we have to keep it a secret that we even talk because he is scared she will leave him again and has forbidden her from talking to anyone in her past. We still text each other almost daily and she still says she loves me but refuses to leave him again. Is there any way I can get her back?

[amicon]

Look at the facts:She breaks up with her boyfriend to be with you- then dumps you to go back to him whilst keeping up secret text messaging with you.Does this sound healthy to you?Why would you want to be with someone who plays two guys?Leave the mess behind and in the future don't get involved with someone who s already in a relationship.

[HellHound82]

She wasn't in a relationship at first, I was scared and waited and she met him before I told her how I felt

[redhed35]

she wasnt in a relationship at first, i was scared and waited and she met him before i told her how i felt

Your making excuses for her..

She's using you and cheating on him...

For your own mental and emotional health walk away,this is a threesome that will only get worse.

[Gemini54]

I think that she's playing you both and that she's being dishonest. Is this what the girl of your dreams does? Sounds like a bad dream to me.

[I wish]

Harshness warning

1) She's flip-flopping her feelings. This is what we call a triangle.

2) You're now her backup plan, just in case it doesn't work out with this guy she can always come crying back to you.

3) She's messing with your mind. How can you even believe her anymore?

Stop being her dormat. Stop being her safety net. Have some self-respect and go find someone else who's not "all of the above".

[talaniman]

is there any way I can get her back?

Relax, she is already back, as your secret text buddy. That's all she wants you to have of her. Don't worry, if her official b/f cuts up to bad, you might get moved up the food chain.

Until then, be happy with being second fiddle.

If you can't realize your being played, then I'm not going to tell you.

[HellHound82]

Thanks all... moment of weakness

[Gemini54]

thanx all.... moment of weakness

We all have them...

[HellHound82]

OK, I think I already know the answer but I felt the need for input anyway, the girl I mentioned in my last post is single again and says she wants me back... should I give her another chance?

[I wish]

Threads merged
Please keep all your questions about the same issue in the same thread.

If she just broke up, then give her some space to allow her to recover from the break up. Let her contact you if she needs to talk, but don't put any pressure on her.

[Reactor]

Well, your going to do it anyway, so if you wish upon immediate gratification now, and tortoreous pain later, be our guest.

[DerelictHerds]

Well, your going to do it anyways, so if you wish upon immediate gratification now, and tortoreous pain later, be our guest.

Bingo

[ohsohappy]

I really think you should try to pursue this girl. She obviously can not make up her mind, and she's using your infatuation for her to her advantage to keep playing games. You don't wan tto get mixed up with this, she's got some issues, don't make them yours. Good luck with this one. :)

[unaffected]

ok, i think i already know the answer but i felt the need for input anyway, the girl i mentioned in my last post is single again and says she wants me back.... should i give her another chance?

She is single... for now. You could "give her another chance", and she could do the same thing all over again. It's a vicious cycle. And if you give her another chance, and she doesn't go back to the ex, she may find another "secret text buddy" to replace the open position, since you got promoted.

I would stay away from her. She's a player!!

[talaniman]

Why, what has changed?

Move forward, not back, as you already know what she is about.

[HellHound82]

Like I said fugured I knew the answer, just wanted to know if anyone thought that I should

[EliteMatchmaker]

The fact is: She was never fully available in the 1st place. How many conversations have you actually with her boyfriend? Could you possibly what he cares about? Perhaps you are basing on what information she, "the middle man" has conveniently provided. Maybe he's nice guy, just like you. After all, you have the same tastes. 1st things, never criticize negatively somebody that you're in love has seen or is seeing. Basically you're saying something about there choices in men, which ultimately comes right back to you. It casts doubt in there mind about their choice in you. Support yourself 1st and worry about her later. Is she there to fully step up to the plate and worry about you. Passive aggressive (returning to what she failed to finish, her boyfriend), tactics always leave you, not in 1st and not really even in last place, nowhere, that's where they leave you. She's is beginning a pattern of having her cake and eating it too. Worry less about her and more about you and suddenly her true colors will be clear on her decision regarding your relationship. All the best -- EM

[HellHound82]

I have had plenty of conversations with him, we used to be friends. Anyway it is over I am not going to give her another chance

[abc_abc_abc]

2) You're now her backup plan, just in case it doesn't work out with this guy she can always come crying back to you.

Agree 100%