Should I leave my fiancé over text cheating
I am college student and was, until 4 days ago, going to be married in July. I just recently left my fiancé over some texts I learned about. I can't forget what he's done, and everyone is telling me to leave him, and I know I should, but he keeps telling me what a mistake it was and how he would never hurt me again, and I want to believe him. The thing is, he's made mistakes in the past and they just keep getting worse.
My ex is the only relationship I have ever had. I met him when he came to my church where my father was the preacher. I was 16 years old and he was 19. We started dating right away and were off and on for a while, until he moved to CA for 4 months (my dad thought I needed separation to see if I really loved him), but once he returned from CA, we were completely on. When I first met him, I was very young (obviously) and I was ambitious. I graduated a year early from school, so when we were first dating, I was applying to college. A lot of the problems we had early on were because I wanted to go to really good,prestigious schools , and I felt like he would hold me back, because he went to trade school. But, after I visited schools to make my decision, I decided to go to a school in state, rather than Duke or Bryn Mawr or NYU or wherever else I could have chosen. Since then, I've been sure that he was the one for me, and we were supposed to be together, and we've been planning a wedding. Before I made that decision to stay in-state (which I did not make because of him, in all honesty) he was always going home (he's originally from AZ) and sleeping with his ex girlfriends when we broke up, and even when we were together he would text them. He also had an inappropriate relationship with this girl from our town; it wasn't sexual or anything but I felt like it was his back up plan. Also, there was this girl from the internet that he met in MO at this conference, but I don't know if he went there to meet her. Anyway, because of those things I've had doubts about our relationship.
Recently though, I've been feeling really good about us. I love him so much and I didn't have any doubt or anything, and I was so happy to plan our wedding and pick out our dishes and stuff. But 4 days ago I learned that he had been texting my sister, in a sexual way. My sister is 15 and, as its just come of out, kind of a whore. She lost her virginity at 13 and she's been sneaking out and having sex with all these guys. Apparently she sent my ex suggestive texts all the time, and one time he made this sexual joke and she jumped on it. She sent him pics of her (really graphic) and tried to get him to have sex with her. He didn't start it, and he says he didn't mean what he said, but apparently he was texting her back pictures of his package and stuff and talking about taking her to a hotel or having her come to his bachelor party (when he was drunk.. ). I am so numb right now I can't believe what he's done. And I don't understand my sister. Why would she do that to me. When we were little she used to tell me horrible stuff like she hated me and she wanted me to die or get raped or run over by a car, but I always just thought she had an anger problem. This makes me feel like she has no love for me at all. NONE!
And my ex; he was the one person I felt like I could be myself around, and I didn't have to keep up this image of trying to be the best, the smartest and prettiest and skinniest. I've gained weight since I've come to school (like 10 pounds) but I still get hit on, so I don't understand why he wouldn't be happy with me. And he keeps saying it didn't feel real and he couldn't take it seriously, which is why he said some of the things he said to my sister, like it was porn or something and not real or serious. And he keeps saying he wasn't attracted to my sister. And I don't understand that, because why would he do and say things if he wasn't attracted to her? And then I get scared because my sis and I are so different, I don't see how he could be attracted to both of us. We are both pretty (not gorgeous, but pretty) but we are so diff. I'm 5'8" and 120 pounds and have long blondish hair and my sister is 5'3" and 116 pounds and has shoulder length brown hair. I mean her boobs and butt are bigger than mine and everything but I am more toned and still have boobs and everything, just smaller, and I always thought he liked my body type more. I'm so scared he's not really attracted to me and likes that kind of girl more. But he keeps begging me to forgive him but I don't know if I should. I want to, I love him so much, and I've built everything around him, and us. He's my best friend and really my only friend. I've moved a lot so the only other friends I have are in CA and Australia, and he's the only one I talk to everyday and share everything with. But I'm so scared that with his past behavior and stuff he won't change, and he will hurt me again, next time worse. What would I do if I was 30, and we had kids, and he did something? But I love him so much. I need help. But I understand if no one bothers to read this post its so long.