From engagement rings to break up? My story
My boyfriend and I had been dating for just over 2 years... we had a wonderful relationship for the most part. In January we started to argue a bit- mostly because his partying habits had escalated recently. I mentioned it to him and he said he had been unhappy about fighting too... so much so that he confessed he had looked for an angagement ring for me, had it set, but the fighting began and he panicked- called the jeweler and had it sold to someone else!!
At first I almost choked on my food that day that he had he even told me that during our lunch chat. Then he said that's where he was emotionally and wanted to work on things to get there again- I agreed and for the next few months things were great. We planned a nice vacation together- well, I planned it. But we had a great time on it in may. What freaked me about it was that he had asked his friends (married couple) to join us. Normally id have no problem with that but the fact that they were BIG party people made me a bit uneasy as I had planned this trip to be relaxing for US. He reassured me that it wouldn't jeoprodize our time together- and for the most part it didn't. Minus one night where I said, "please lets compromise on going to bed by 3am so we can have a nice beach day tomorrow." he agreed but when 3 am rolled around he was begging me to stay out later!! I refused- which made me look like a bratty girlfriend, but whatever, we had a deal!
Anyway, a month later I find myself frustrated with the fact that I feel I'm putting all the effort in any plans together for us, and I decided to mention it to him. I also mentioned that he hadn't signed up for one class to finish his degree (class never transferred but he walked at graduation). I told him I had helped him get the info for th class and he obvs. Had the money from the stimulus check- I just didn't get hwy he wouldn't take the class. He flipped on me and said he just didn't want to- I said he didn't want to better himself and I shouldn't have to push him to do so. Mind u- I'm 25, he's 26. This was a class from 2005!
The conversation escalated to our break up- he said he wasn't happy, he didn't feel excited anymore about hanging out with (THAT KILLED ME), he was content with his life right now, he wasn't sure what he wanted anymore. Every time I tried to compromise or suggest a fix to an issue- he could take the class online id help, we could make plans we both liked to do, we could party in ways we both enjoyed- he'd just say he didn't know. I asked how could you go from wanting the same things I did out of this to not knowing?? He said he thought he wanted a life together soon, but now that he's 26 he wasn't sure. I told him he obviously didn't want to try anymore and he wanted to break up- so he should just say it. At this point we were both hysterically crying and he finally said "my gut is telling me we should break up and if i realize in time i made the biggest mistake of my life, i'll come crawling back to you begging for forgiveness."
I was devastated and all I could manage to say was "its not me this time its you. this your issue.....but please come back to me." and I left.
This was a month and a half ago. I've been miserable... ive been doing evrything I can not to call (its been 10 days now with nc), trying to talk to family, hang out with friends, etc... maybe it was cold feet? Maybe I nagged too much? WHAT HAPPENED??