I have major feelings for this guy, I'm so in love with him that I would do anything for him. Me and him have our ups and downs though, we barely see each other because of my parents, my parents are really strict and there really hard on me and it affects me and him from seeing each other. We always talk about how we feel, but he's always saying time is getting short or he's wasting his time, every time he brings it up to me I cry and my heart begins to pound really fast and I'm to the point too where I don't know what to do anymore. I think about things that has happened between me and him, I can never stop thinking about him and what has happened because all I want is for things to be right.. He's always pointing out the things I do wrong and I try working on the problems that I do wrong but he's always coming at me with more stuff that I do wrong, I don't know how to overcome all of this or what to do, all I do is try I try for him because I care about him so much and I love him very deeply with all my heart and soul... I just need some advice on what too do??

This does not sound like a good relationship, especially since he is always on you about stuff.
How old are you and how often do you see him?

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Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

This does not sound like a good relationship, especially since he is always on you about stuff.
How old are you and how often do you see him?

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I am 18 and he's 17 and we see each other in school and after I get done with my job.

I just don't understand at all, I mean he says that he's just wasting time... I mean if he's wasting time with me, then why is he still with me?

He's always saying explain how I feel but its hard to explain how I feel to him because he's always coming at me with the wrong things I do. I mean I want to try and explain things to him but I think so much about things and I don't even know where to begin..

He does not sound like a very nice guy. Why are you still with someone who treats you so poorly. Are you having sex with him?

Noooooo we haven't done that yet at all ma'am, were not even thinking about that right now... I mean we have talked about it but as far as doing it, noo not at all. He says he don't mean to hurt me, he just wants me to realize that I can be open with him but its sooo hard when you have a lot on your mind... I mean he lied to me like a couple of weeks ago and I was more upset then mad at him.. He has this girl and there fiends and well her name is mia, and theymet by his friends and stuff and well one day I was on the phone with him and all of a sudden he brings her up to me because they live right beside each other almost and he was like I got to get off here Im going to call you back and I was okay and well it got me thinking ohh he's going to hang with her or why else would he bring her up? After that I texted him and asked him are you hanging with her and he said NOO! I was okay, well I was going to into and stuff that day I got off picked him up and we went to the park and he was texting her while we were hanging and that makes me sad and mad at the same time because why would any guy text another girl while ahnging with someone you have feelings for ? So I grabbed his phone and he was liike NOOO I ran out the car and looked at the essages and it wasn't bad but they did hang,they were hanging at park and so I threw the phone at him and walked to sit down on the bench to think about some things and I began to get emotional and it took like 10 minutes for him to come to because he knew I caught him and it was rele cold that day and so he brought me my hoody and I was like why did you lie to me? He said because I knew how you would have reacted if I told you and I doo react a lot about some things that's aren't even that big of a deal but he should have been honest with me from the start and now he's bee=ing honest with me and everything because he knew he did wrong...

Work*

What should I say to him? I mean what would you say to him if you were in my position?

How long have you been dating this guy? Think you need to leave him alone as he does not seem to be good for you and you don't seem happy with him.

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Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

How long have you been dating this guy? Think you need to leave him alone as he does not seem to be good for you and you don't seem happy with him.

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Its been a year and I am happy, I'm happy when Im around him its just that he acts like I'm the only one doing wrong.

Its going to be 2 years this January

Maybe he is trying to make excuses to break up. If you are always doing wrong, why is he still with you?
You can't be that happy if he is always on you about stuff. You need to decide if he is worth all of this drama. Maybe you need some space and time away from him.

Well what would you say to him, if you were in my position?

Ask him if he is wasting his time and if you are so bad, why is he still with you?
Tell him he would appreciate it if he would stop being critical or just leave you alone.

I asked him why,he was like do you want me to give up? I was like noo.

I just want to say something that will crush him and make him realize you know what he is doing..

Tell him to stop criticizing you or leave.
I think he gets a kick out of criticizing you because you let him. What kind of things does he criticize you about?

I think your right, umm well he says I repeat myself a lot, he says I say dumb crap and do dumb crap.

Ohh and apparently that mia girl is more like open then me and when he told me that I was like WOW. He was like I don't like her like that though. I mean he don't bring her up a lot but he brings her up once in a blue moon..

He belittles you and you don't do that to people you care about. You need to leave him alone.
He does this because you let him, Tell him to get lost. He is not the only guy in the world.

Yeah, I think your right. I know he's not the only guy in the world, but its hard to let go of a guy you care about a lot. What should I tell him?

How can I stop him from doing that to me?

When he does it, tell him to stop or leave and mean it. He will either stop or he'll leave.
You have to be seriously tired of being treated this way. Until you are, there is nothing I can tell you.

Okay I want to thank you so much for this, you really helped out a lot when nobody else can and I really appreciate it.(:

You're welcome. I wish you well.

What do if the guy you like says "I'm going to give you week to change" I don't know what I'm doing wrong?

My name is Amber, I am 18 years old. I'm having major problems with this guy that Ive been talking to about a year now. My feelings for him are very strong, I Love him very dearly. I know I might be to young for love, but in my opinion loving someone doesn't have an age. I stress everyday because me and him have our ups and downs, he's always saying I say dumb things or do dumb things, he's always coming at me with stuff I do wrong, I try everyday to fix with whatever I'm doing wrong but he comes at me with more wrong I do.. To be honest, I don't think he see's what wrong he is doing to me... I get so emotional and I have headaches because all I want to do is make things right with him and make things better for us and our relationship. He says he don't mean to hurt me by telling me about what I do wrong or what I say that is dumb, but to be honest it hurts me whether he's not trying to hurt me or not.. He says that I'm not the type of girl to explain how I feel to him, but how am I suppose to if he's coming at me with all this negativity? I think so much and its so hard to put what all I think about into words... He says I always think negative about what he says, but the stuff he says like calling me dumb, that's being negative... Sometimes I wonder what to? Or how can I change this? To make things more better for us..

Why are you taking all the responsibility for this relationship?

I'd say, "Goodbye and have a nice life."

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Why are you taking all the responsibility for this relationship?

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Apparently I'm doing something wrong...

I agree with Wondergirl. Why stay in a bad relationship with someone so narrow minded and selfish? Life's too short - so go have fun.

I think you are right!

fieldsar, I merged your threads together to keep all of the advice in one place since it is all dealing with the same relationship and person.

I think you have learned a valuable lesson about what you don't want in a relationship. Let this boyfriend go and allow yourself to heal.

I love him too much 2 do that, I just need a break though

What about him causes you to love him?

What is there inside you that is willing to lose yourself in him and his demands?

I mean he can be good, its just that sometimes I do take some things he says way out of proportion. Like for example like if he says something that's not mean I take it way of proportion and think it is. I love his personality, I love how he can be caring for me and make me feel better when I'm down.. Everything about him makes me feel COMPLETE and happy and I just want him to change something's about about him that he does.

Anytime some one tells you they are going to leave you if you don't change, or I'm giving you a week to change, that is a sign that person is not into you. That is controlling.
You should not have to change who you are to keep someone interested. It certainly is not going to make you happy. Is he willing to change who he is to make you happy? I would guess not.
You need to leave this guy alone.