Ask Me Help Desk - Open Letter to your 'Ex'

Open Letter to my Ex

I was thinking, for those of you, who still have some residual feelings, about the breakup of your relationship, what do you think about, posting an open letter to your Ex (leaving their name out of course) right here. Get out all those emotions you are keeping in, ask those questions that are in your head, say the things you wish you could say. Type it up, post it, and truly try and cleanse yourself of those thoughts and emotions preventing you from moving forward.

What I am hoping by suggesting this, is for those who really need to get that last bit of hurt out, who have been tempted to contact their ex to ask that unanswered question , perhaps it will help to do an open letter to your Ex. This could be your way of YOU closing this chapter and on your way to days where it truly is all about you!

If this isn't a good idea :o I would understand. Honest. I just want all of your hurts to leave you and this thought popped in my head as a way that may be able to help. I don't know :rolleyes: To be honest, in reading some of your post, I have been tempted to write the letter myself to some of these ex's... geeez.
So what do you think? Any one feel like starting the “ Open letter to my Ex” thread?

Allheart, I think this is a great idea since writing is very cathartic. I look forward to reading some letters!!

Here's my contribution:

Dear ex,
Die in a fire.

Yours truly

Quote:

Originally Posted by ForeverZero

Here's my contribution:

Dear ex,
Die in a fire.

Yours truly

LMAO - Now see don't you feel better. I was hoping for some humor as well. Good for you. OMG!!

P.S. Tell that guy you're dating I hope he chokes.

I wish I could be bitter towards my ex... seems like it would be easier.

My letter would probably say something like, I wish you wouldn't see me as such a bad person since I didn't really do anything wrong. Haha now I sound pathetic.

Dear Ex-
I hope you get hit by a bus.. since everything was always my fault. Oh yea and I hope one day someone beats you the way you did me. I used to be mad at myself for letting you treat me this way, now Im mad at you for always being an . I hope your woman learns fast about you before you smack her around and call her stupid and she realizes its too late to run away because you will stalk her for the rest of her life as well. And oh yea its been 5 years please leave me alone. Im trying so hard to move on but you keep popping your head into my life> I want to get married and forget you ever existed!!

To my ex's,

Thank you for giving me the greatest gift of all. Freedom.

God, I could do this all day,

To my ex's

No matter how much time I spent with you and no matter how lost I could get in your eyes, I could never go completely insane like you are.

Love always

Dear ex,

Well, I see your life hasn't changed for the better since you split up with me. You said it yourself you haven't changed, still think you are 17, and take no responsibility for yourself or your future. I really doubt anyone will put up with what I did, and I think you lost a big part of your life when you lost me. I looked after you, supported you and was always there for you. So, you loved me but were not in love with me, we were too different, you said you changed into an a*****e near the end, you wanted a clean break but you wanted us to still be friends, you wanted me to still email you, - no wonder I was and still am a bit confused! You never would speak about your problems in your life, you just let them all pile up, and would get angry. I was the top of your list i.e. I think you thought life would be easier/better without me, Well is it?

wap : )

Hey I am in a really funny mood today, how about we send our exes a batch of spiders for Valentines day ha ha ! I am evil! Oh OK, I could never be evil I know!

My darling ex,
Well one year ago we were planning our wedding and today I sit here getting mails about how you found my photo from when I was a child and funny things that have been happening to you recently.
What the f*** is going on!
Did you not realise all the f****** hurt and damage you caused me when you left me to cancel everything and tell everyone while you f****** off and then if that was not bad enough to f*** me 3 months after that and have the nerve to call it love and feelings.

I hope your f****** life nowadays is all that you thought it would be and that you will seriously think before you tell someone else that you love her every day for 2 years , that she were the best thing that ever happened to you, want to be with her forever,and ask her to marry you. Get out of your dream world and start living in reality.

Your dear ex who is still alive today , I believe any other girl who had to put up with this situation would have ended her life by this stage.

You guys are doing so great with this. Do you know what the great things is, you can get it all out, not have to worry, what will they think , or will they respond or maybe I shouldn't say that. Guess what, say it…and free yourself from all of it. This can be your way of getting some internal control back. Good for all of you and go for it!!

Hoping this helps.

Allheart

Thanks allheart! Seriously therauputic.
Ahhh I feel better.

I would feel better if we all pay 10p for charity and line up to throw custards pies in their faces!

Gosh I nearly feel like sending it to him!!

Wow Rol, so honest! I can imagine you saying this to him face to face with a frying pan/rolling pin in your hand! Ha ha! Yeah, it's a shame we didn't get angry with them face to face or by phone/email - we are so polite aren't we?

Well when I talked with him at the end of October I did say some of those things, and told him how he will never find someone like me again, and in a few a years he will realise it but by then it will be too late, he agreed with what I said. I did raise my voice and get angry and it was the first time in our relationship that he saw that. Luckily there was no pan/rolling pin nearby lol ;-)

And it felt good to finally get angry with him as I had bottled in those feelings for 5 months.
It kind of helped me get to the next stage of healing and let him face the reality of what he had done.

Good for you Rol. I just got annoyed because my ex sweeps things under the carpet. When I saw him last month, he had obviously still been doing that, and just working to take his mind off things. Problems don't go away, you have to deal with things.

Dear Ex idiot type person…

You came home to a half empty house and when you left this morning you had no idea when you returned I and the cat would be gone.
I have no regrets well just one I left the rabbit but at least I know you took care of it, it was about all you were capable of doing.
I think the only thing in our 10 years together that you did right was take me to the edge of the pasture that showed me new life even though you did it without realising.
What I have now is 20 zillion times better than anything you could have given me and the best thing of all is I am loved by an honest man.
All I can hope is you learnt from why I left and you now treat your wife with a lot more respect than you ever did me and that your mother isn't as evil to her.
May you and your family be eternally happy and once again I thank you for setting me free into the arms of a man that really is a man.

Laura.

Dear Ex,

How does it feel now to be the poster boy for herpes? Guess life wasn't so bad with me after all! (he contracted herpes from his new wife and had the gall to accuse me of giving it to him before the divorce - just to prove him wrong, I went and got tested and mailed the resuilts not only to him but to his doctor and his biotch of a mother).

Allheart, I love this thread... You are a genius!!

Here goes,

Dear ex,

Thanks for revealing your true colours. In time you will realise what was special about me! Oh... if you want to do better than me, I suggest you change that picture of you laying half naked on a bed on that website. It is like a pervert or user magnet!

Your loving and caring ex,

***Thanks Allheart>>you made my day!! :)

Dear Mr. Handsome,

Thank you so much for being my first love. There is no one that I would have wanted to trust my heart to for the first time, then you. You were older and wiser than me, and protected me from things I never needed to be exposed to. I thought you were the most handsomest man from day one!! And so did all the girls, oh and so did you < LOL!! I know I was 21, but my mind was far younger, thank you for never getting frustrated or exposing my vulnerabilities.

Not sure why our roads went in different directions, but they did. I do have one regret, and that is not thanking you, for loving me in return, for putting a smile on my face and in my heart, for never being unkind to me or making me feel silly when I was being silly. Mostly, for having that twinkle in your eye, when you looked at me, I will forever cherish that memory. As well as the memory of you.

May you be resting in peace right now. I know that you are. What you think of me now, huh? Grew up a bit didn’t I. Watch over me, if you can and I will continue to pray for you.

You will forever be special to me, you will forever have a place in my heart.

Rest well Sweetheart (and don’t be chasing all the pretty angels)

Thanks rol - keep in mind - mine is about 20 years ago... so as time passes, thankfully
I can only remember the things that made me smile :)

Hugs to you.

Did he die?

Quote:

Originally Posted by rol

did he die?

He did, a couple years back. I had lost contact with him, but did hear of his passing.
He was about 20 years older than me. He's at peace.

Hope I didn't make anyone sad.!

Keep those letters coming!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Allheart

He did, a couple years back. I had lost contact with him, but did hear of his passing.
He was about 20 years older than me. He's at peace.

Hope I didn't make anyone sad.!!!

Keep those letters coming !!!!

Ok its off topic but can I post a letter to my dad?

Dear ex,

I can't believe your feelings can come and go so fast, as if our relationship was a joke or something. When we first broke up, you said you wanted to remain friends, now I feel like you wish I would just disappear. I'm moving on, and I don't want to get back together. But I just think is sad about how much you have changed. I guess I never really got to know the real you. I gave you the space you wanted, yet you're still being so cold. Oh well, at least now I can accept that it's over.

I think your current lifestyle is really screw up though. I feel like you get high, so you can skip class and avoid to see me. I know you smoke pot everyday, just don't know how much. I hate how you would stay up all night to chill out with your friends, almost like everyday. I never knew how much of a pothead you are, and how much you rely on having company with your friends to be happy.

I wonder how you feel about me now, and if you ever meant anything that you once promised me. But those doesn't matter now, because they are things from the past.

So I hope you keep meeting b*tches from now on, and thanks for screwing with a poor innocent girl's heart. You stupid pothead!

Dear ex,

I've put your pictures to good use and ironically at the same time improved my dart game!

Always in your heart.

Quote:

Originally Posted by curlybenswife

Ok its off topic but can i post a letter to my dad??

ABSOLUELTY!! Get writing girl!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Allheart

You guys are doing so great with this. Do you know what the great things is, you can get it all out, not have to worry, what will they think , or will they respond or maybe I shouldn’t say that. Guess what, say it…and free yourself from all of it. This can be your way of getting some internal control back. Good for all of you and go for it !!!

Hoping this helps.

Allheart

Okay in that vain I was holding this back and I'm going to type it. It's going to offend someone so if your easily offended stop now. Read at your own risk...

Dearest ex's... All of you. And the ones who weren't official ex's but still used me,

You know that old phrase that goes, "I wouldn't pee on you if you were on fire." Well I just want you to know that if you were on fire, you have nothing to worry about, because I would still pee on you.

Forever and Always a special place in my heart,
Chuff

Quote:

Originally Posted by Allheart

He did, a couple years back. I had lost contact with him, but did hear of his passing.
He was about 20 years older than me. He's at peace.

Hope I didn't make anyone sad.!!!

Keep those letters coming !!!!

Chuuuuuf no I didn't make you sad!! Sad is not allowed :)

He was HOT! LOL :) and I was dupid :) but he loved me anyway :) He just had this way of walking... oh my!!

Ha ha that was the best yet Chuff!!
Pee on them all!!

What a great thread you have started DR Allheart.

<<Hope I didn't make anyone sad.! >>

Yes!!
But I was so angry earlier that I've kind of evened up a bit and back to normal now ;-)

Quote:

Originally Posted by talaniman

What a great thread you have started DR Allheart.

Thanks Tal ;)

Wanted to do something, and short of me writing some of these ex's a letter, felt it may be a little more productive and what is turning out to be fun ( uh thanks Chuff), having the folks write the letters themselves. And what a fine job they are doing!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Allheart

Chuuuuuf no I didn't make you sad!!! Sad is not allowed :)

He was HOT !! LOL :) and I was dupid :) but he loved me anyway :) He just had this way of walking...oh my!!!

No, I wasn't sad at all. In fact I was very motivated to know that it is possible to date someone 20 years younger. That is my goal. When I'm 40 I want to date a 20 year old.

In fact I'm kind of surprised more women don't in a way. Older men are more mature, know what they want, and finacially comfortable. And I think many people would disagree with this but I'd think an older man would be less likely to cheat because he doesn't have the desire to hook up with every one he sees like many 20 year guys. I'd peg the older guy to be more loyal in that regard.

When I was 20 through 22 or 23 I went out with a woman who was 12 years older than me. I never gave it much thought. I worked with a beautiful girl who went out with a guy for 5 years that was 18 years older than her. She actually mentioned to me that guys in their 20's weren't mature and that was one of the things he liked about him.

Quote:

Originally Posted by chuff

No, I wasn't sad at all. In fact I was very motivated to know that it is possible to date someone 20 years younger. That is my goal. When I'm 40 I want to date a 20 year old.

In fact I'm kind of surprised more women don't in a way. Older men are more mature, know what they want, and finacially comfortable. And I think many people would disagree with this but I'd think an older man would be less likely to cheat because he doesn't have the desire to hook up with every one he sees like many 20 year guys. I'd peg the older guy to be more loyal in that regard.

When I was 20 through 22 or 23 I went out with a woman who was 12 years older than me. I never gave it much thought. I worked with a beautiful girl who went out with a guy for 5 years that was 18 years older than her. She actually mentioned to me that guys in their 20's weren't mature and that was one of the things he liked about him.

Chuff,

That's why I am so grateful to him. I felt safe. If that makes sense. I was very fortunate to fall that way. I really needed that maturity. All that you said was very true. Plus.. he was hot.. hee hee LOL. But I again am grateful. My head honestly was filled with nothing but air at that time, trusted and just loved the whole world , so at least I had some mature wisdom there to guide me a little better.

<<In fact I'm kind of surprised more women don't in a way. Older men are more mature, know what they want, and finacially comfortable>>

Well personally most of the early 30 something men I know these days are seriously in mid life crisis!! I'm actually beginning to think maybe it starts early these days before they settle down. So its true a guy of 40 is not a bad idea! Or get a young one and train him in!! ;-)

My Dearest Ann Marie (Yes this is a real ex)

After I picked up the pieces I was left with some of your clothing. I decided to do the right thing and donate them to a homeless shelter. When I got there I pulled out your clothes to display that were no holes in them. The homeless guy then said, "Hey don't these belong to Ann Marie?" Then another homeless guy said, "Yeah I'd recognize those anywhere they were always on the ground under the bridge!"

I guess I'm not surprised.
Chuff