Multiple threads merged.

My girlfriend; the love of my life has recently lost someone very close to her, and I couldn't be there for her when she really needed me. Now I risk losing her. She has mentioned that to be in a great and healthy relationship, I need to learn to not be selfish, to be able to put myself last and to take myself out of my comfort zone and stop taking the easyway out. She's moving out soon and I need to find some way that I can prove to her that I can do those things, I don't need to prove my love for her because true love can't be proven, it's just there if it's right. How can I not be selfish, and put her and her son first and how can I stop taking the easy way out of situations?

If you love her, it should constantly show in your actions. Love and actions work together. You don't have to keep proving it, because it's in your eyes, the smile on your face, your warmth and caring. You can tell her a thousand times a month how much you love her, but actions speak much louder than words. That special smile when you see her, hugging and kissing her, etc. It's always the little things you do such as listening if she has a problem and really caring and helping all you can. When she isn't feeling well, you should be there, and when she's down then you should be bringing laughter into the situation. You can't buy love and you can't force love on her if she doesn't love you back. If you respect yourself, have a good soul and heart then that's what sticks out and tells her what a great person you are and how much you love her. If she can't see that in you and doesn't treat you the same back, then you both haven't found that "special someone."

When you say you take the easy way out what exactly do you mean? Being there for a person(especially when they need you the most), having open communication, and being honest are some ways to showing a person you care. You know what you need to do to keep this girl so do it if it isn't too late. Do the opposite of what you been doing.

I mean by if I have to options of doing something, one might require a little more effort where the other is hassle free. It's like I avoid difficult situations.

I mean by if I have two options of doing something, one might require a little more effort where the other is hassle free. It's like I avoid difficult situations.

I can only suggest that you work on yourself,for yourself.

I don't know if that would save your relationship,change doesn't happen overnight.

If you really loved her, you wouldve been there for her especially if a family member died.

I was looking through my girlfriends phone pix, cause she's been taking pics of her self but won't let me see 'em and I know they're sexy by the outfits I see her taking in the bathroom. I discovered some nude ones and got excited, then I looked closer; it wasn't a mirror shot, I couldn't see the phone anywhere in the pic, and her hands are obviously not on it either. Some one has took nude photos pf her, so I believe she's cheating on me, and I want to know, if there is some kind of way to gt her to admit it, with out looking obvious. I feel ing crushed. She always accused me of cheating on her and I never had, but now I think she is cheating on me.

When you say she won't let you see the pictures,
How would you ask her about them?
How would she respond?

She has been real protective of her phone, so I figured something was up, but she basically said no, she's not photogenic like she always does.

Like she always says

My ex (we just broke up last week, hence why I'm here lol) would be very confrontational just from a simple question.

If you want to get the cat out of the bag, simply ask her directly "I saw nude pictures on your phone, how come you didn't want to share those with me?"

Most likely, it won't be worth the trouble, consider breaking ties.

Naw man, I want to not seem obvious that I found the pictures, but I need to say something that will get her to admit it herself.

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Originally Posted by abeknopf

naw man, I want to not seem obvious that I found the pictures, but I need to say something that will get her to admit it herself.

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What could you say that will make her admit it herself?

Plus, what would that even get you?

I had looked in my girlfriends phone to look at some sexy pics and accidentally changed some settings back to default. If she finds out and confronts me, what do I say so that she's not seriously pissed?

You go and confess, if you wait till she finds lut, there will be little you can say

You tell her what you did and why you did it.
Honesty is the best policy.

Tell her what you did, own up to it and take your punishment

looks like you have more on your mind then just snooping.

you need to talk to your girlfriend,and you both need to be honest.

one of the great phases I have learned on this site is, no trust = no relationship.

I would definitely confess BEFORE she finds out on her own.

Why were you snooping to begin with? Has she cheated in the past?

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Originally Posted by redhed35

looks like you have more on your mind then just snooping.

you need to talk to your girlfriend,and you both need to be honest.

one of the great phases i have learned on this site is, no trust = no relationship.

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This relationship is definitely not healthy.

This isn't as easy as just telling her what happened. I don't know how much trust she has in you being there for her. You also mention her 'moving out soon' and her son. What is actually going on in this relationship?

Communication is always a good place to start. Learning from your mistakes and moving on together is another good step. Is she really willing to work with you on the problems in the relationship?

Please keep all questions regarding the same issue in the same thread so that we can follow your story and give you appropriate advice.

You should start by owning up to your mistake. You violated her privacy, now it's time to face the consequences.

Secondly, if you have so many insecurities, to the point that you need to be snooping around, then you have much bigger issues than just confronting her about your snoop-fest.

Instead of sneaking around, be direct and work out your issues with her. Open communication is the way to go.