There is the most beautiful girl in this planet. I love her so passionally that I will die for her. I play baseball and I go to the same school she goes to. One thing happened... I don't have as much time as I used to have to spend with her. Because the mentioned reasons. Now she started developing feelings for a different guy which is a "friend" she supposedly met in one of her classes. I love her so much that I will even kill myself... I have try so hard for more than 3 days to see what I did wrong she replies to me that she loves me. That she loves me and will never forget about me. But she is still talking to this guy and I don't know what to do... I don't want to lose her... should I do something to the guy... what should I doo please... help me... I will die if I don't get help quick...

Wait? What? Die? Am I reading this right?
First off, how old are you?
Secondly, you need to take a chill pill ASAP. Dying for a girl, please that's the stupidest thing I ever heard. No beauty in this world warrant that kind of action, and it is so superficial on top of that.

Here is what you need to do, apply No Contact right now because it seems you have some problems getting attached to her. Also you need to see a counselor or a psychiatric as soon as possible, you need all the help you can get.

I'm only 20 years old... but I've been dating her for like 1 year and 4 months... what other advice can you give me... please.. I love her man

I agree - chill out man! You want to kill yourself, you want to do something to the other guy... huh?

Firstly, why don't you try talking to her? If she's your GF and you've been dating - I'm assuming you talk? Talk to her for heaven's sake - ask her what's happening and let her answer.

Try and not act like a total desperado. You'll drive her away by acting sooooo deperate.

This sounds better but when I talk to her she says that she is confused

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Originally Posted by alexbeltre

This sounds better but when i talk to her she says that she is confuse

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So you leave her alone so you both can deal with your confusion. She is confused about another guy, you are confused about your life being worth anything... all over a female.

Walk away and get your head straight.

By acting needy and desperate you WILL lose her. A man, a real man, keeps his cool no matter what. Not only will she find that attractive but all the girls will.
Look, it's total bull to be crasy about her like that, I knew my ex 6 years and we dated 3 and I'm doing fine now. You should ask yourself why you are so dependent on her. Work out a bit, get your head straight.

You already had 1 year and 4 months together. So your feelings for her are pretty clear and she knows it.

She's the one who's confused. So what do you do? I suggest you leave her alone until she figures out what she wants. You don't need to confuse her more.

You also need some distance from her so that you can calm down. Some space would do both of you some good.

Thank you this really helped

Yea and don't go all crasy and suicidal on us, you know its bs.

Your 20, so don't let a confused female confuse you. Just back up, calm down, and get with your buds for a while, and just chill. Even if she doesn't get her act together the way you want, there are still other things to do that are a lot more fun than freaking out over a female.

If you give yourself a chance, there will be a lot more females who are as cute, but not as confused.

For now just chill.

Now I can't stop thinking about that person. I have calm down but it is killing me in the inside.

She is my love. She is my everything. For her. I love her. She recently said that she needed space I'm giving her some space but it is pretty hard for me to look at my cellphone. And not talk to her. I try to abstain. But I end it up sending a message at night I can't stop think of her I lover today. We had a class in the same building. And she told me she needed tools for her art class I gave my credict card to her so she can buy whatever she need then we had a small talk and told me we will talk in 2 day. Or weekend. I told her how much I love her. She said thatsge understand but I ask her if she feels the same way I feel about her ilove her I told her do you think this is a good sign that she will come back to me

So let me get this straight, girl breaks up with you and then asks for a favor, you give her your credit card to get whatever she needs? Dude, are you mental? I understand you love the girl, but this is pathetic, she is now using you.

There is an expression, why buy the cow when you get the milk for free. She left you, still has you by the balls and your wallet as well. What reason does she have to come back? You are a safety net, nothing more. If something better doesn't come along, she will come back but for now she's going to play the field, with other guys.

Hello Alex,

I am trying to get a better understaning here. What did she say when you asked her how she felt about you, please?

Thanks.

She s left you but she thinks you should fork out for things she needs in class? She s using you and the best thing you can do is ignore her.
Actions speak louder than words and her actions show she has no decency nor any respect for you.
Start treating this as a breakup and get yourself back on track.

Until they get merged: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...do-407479.html

Alex, No Contact means just that-No Contact. You cut all ties including but not limited to: phone (yes, cell phones and other people's phones, too), texting, email, Facebook, Myspace, snail mail, smoke signals, etc. You STOP giving her permission to use you and any resources you have including but not limited: home, car, credit card, heart, mind, etc.

You will feel much better if you get rid of this person and allow yourself to heal. It will hurt. It will not be easy. It will take time. It will be worth it when someday you find a woman who truly cares for you and not just what she can get from you.

Keep yourself busy both mentally and physically. Make new friends. Enjoy being yourself instead of her marionette. You might be surprised at how good it can feel to finally declare yourself free.

I want to accept. That I want to be free but this girl is my life I love her she is breaking my heart. How can I go about it so I can get better

Read my guide to NC. "Rules and FAQs about NC"

You delete her off your darn Facebook
Delete her number off your phone
Don't pick up the phone
If you cannot do the two above, put your phone in a desk and forget it
Don't be a doormat for her(ie giving her money)

In short, take back your balls

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Originally Posted by alexbeltre

I want to accept. That i want to be free but this girl is my life i love her she is breaking my heart. How can i go about it so i can get better

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This person is NOT your life. She is not responsible for keeping your heart beating and your brain functioning. YOU are responsible for your own life.

Don't let her break your heart. IT is YOUR heart not hers.

Rome has some great tips.

Something, you need to do is to change your perspective of the relationship and her. You will not die without her. You will be much happier when you get her out of your life.

She's not going to respect you until you respect yourself. And quite frankly, having respect for yourself is more important than getting her back. As others have suggested, the first think you need to do is go NC. The second thing you need to do is NOT be her doormat. You may think that giving her your credit card to buy stuff is going to "win" her over, but it really just shows that you are weak and it won't change her decision. I know, I've been there... I had slacked on a gift I was going to get my ex, and after we broke up I gave her a gift card that I had won to go towards it (more or less because I felt I owed, which I kind of did / didn't, but a part of me thought it would help too). It won't help, look out for yourself and stop trying to control what other people are doing / feel for you. And ease off the suicide talk, nobody is worth that.

She callme and wanted to slleep with me I went she said ahe did it cuase she fwlt bad but I'm still with her I love her. She is my life what can I do to not lose her I love her

I can't stay away from her she is my life my happiness. How I can get her back,. I know I have done many thongs that are not right I give her money. Presents. I cry to her I have gotten on my knees just for her love I got to the point of saying that I don't want to leave. I love her she says that she does too but she wants some space so can figure out things. But she is still talking to this guy she met while I was a baseball practice. I love her. I want her back.

Please help me

Please be patient. This is not a chat room. We volunteer our free time here and many people may be working or spending time with family.

It may take a few hours or more to get a response.

The emotions are flying high right now. Allow yourself to heal so that you will feel more objective about your situation.

You're still in the early stage of the recovery process so it's normal to have these feelings. What you can do to help is to stick with no contact and be patient with yourself. There's no magic potion to heal.

Secondly, you can't force her to get back with you. If she wanted you back, she will find you. It's her choice. You can't "do" things to "win" her back.

Before you ever get someone back, you have to get some dignity and self respect back. Begging never works. She will never miss that, but might want to get away from it.

This isn't the end of the world, stop acting like it. Now leave her alone all the way, till you can regroup, and get your act together.

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Originally Posted by alexbeltre

I can't stay away from her she is my life my happiness. How i can get her back ,.. I know i have done many thongs that are not right i give her money. Presents. I cry to her i have gotten on my knees just for her love i got to the point of saying that i dont want to leave. I love her she says that she does too but she wants some space so can figure out things. But she is still talking to this guy she met while i was a baseball practice. I love her. I want her back.

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I went through a slightly similar phase myself. My boyfriend wanted to break up and I was not ready to let go. After the initial begging I decided that its more important to have dignity and self confidence then love for which I have to beg. I told him I am fine with his decision since I have done all I could anyway. I let him be and I genuinely started to move on (doesn't mean I started dating but I started to take back the control over my life and stopped trying to control the relationship. He came back to me within a week's time saying that he wants to be with me and with no one and nowhere else. That was three years ago. We are still together. I don't know if this will work for you (hopefully it does when she sees that you are moving on) but even if she doesn't come back these thoughts will help you because once you have the self confidence you will know that everything will pass no matter how bad you feel right now.

Hope this helps

Quote:

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Originally Posted by alexbeltre

I can't stay away from her she is my life my happiness. How i can get her back ,.. I know i have done many thongs that are not right i give her money. Presents. I cry to her i have gotten on my knees just for her love i got to the point of saying that i dont want to leave. I love her she says that she does too but she wants some space so can figure out things. But she is still talking to this guy she met while i was a baseball practice. I love her. I want her back.

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If you make someone else responsible for your life and happiness then you will always be sad and miserable.

By crying and pleading you give her all the power and take it all away from yourself. No woman loves a cry baby, so stop being a wimp and start being a man.

Take a deep breath, take a teaspoon of concrete and harden the F up. No one is responsible for your life or your happiness but yourself.

I went through a hard patch like this a while ago. I know how you feel. The thing with me was that started taking days off work. I didn't feel like doing anything. Mind you for me it was a brake up. If you feel that you are having these thoughts. I would suggest you go see a medical doctor. A friend of mine took me when she saw I was so down. They understand because we are not the only ones to have felt anxiety like this. Go see one as soon as possible. They will be able to prescribe something mild that will help you deal better with this.

As expected she is the love of my life. I did everything I could do for a week to get her back.. Bit I think she was seeing me for pity. She says she loves me. But that. She is interested. In that guy she just me. She also says that. She loves me a lot but. I have to give her time. And I told her to stop seeing. Everyone. Or the other guy too so she can think... She told me that. She was not. But I know she will she hides text messages from her and her cousing are pushing her Away from me. It feels. Like everyone is my enemy what. Can I do to get her back.? I love her I don't want to lose her :(:(:(

Alex you ve already been given a lot of good advice regarding this situation-will you please read it again?

Don't look for someone else to love you. Look for what you love about yourself and if you find that you are happy within, you will notice that she probably doesn't deserve you. If you are reading this and saying that it is a bunch of bull, then you are not happy with yourself and you will rarely be happy with someone else. Figure out what it is that you don't like about you and realize that it is not too late to change. LOVE YOU and she will be begging you to let her back.

I love this girl and would like to get back with her... but I haven't talked to her for a week she said that she needed space... before she told me that I bought some flowers which I haven't sent to her.. should I send it to he I love her.. so much I want her back in my life.. . some advice??

Is this the same girl you think is pregnant?

Your girlfriend?

Or is it someone else?

She asked for space,so no flowers.

Leave her alone buddy!! And your threads have been merged but the next one on the same subject will be deleted. No need to start new questions when you can post on this thread.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

Leave her alone buddy!!!! And your threads have been merged but the next one on the same subject will be deleted. No need to start new questions when you can post on this thread.

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Jeez! If iIwas 'his girl' I'd be running for the hills. No wonder she wants space!

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Originally Posted by alexbeltre

i love this girl and would like to get back with her...... but i haven't talked to her for a week she said that she needed space ... before she told me that i bought some flowers which i haven't sent to her .. should i send it to he i love her .. so much i want her back in my life .. .some advice ???

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You are slowly but surely becoming the boyfriend every girl fears, the stalker, the desperate pathetic guy that won't take "go away" for an answer.

You want her back but you're doing everything in your power to drive her away.

You say that you want her back in your life, that you love her so much. What about her? She has wants too, and she doesn't want you.

Back off, go to no contact. If she comes back then you can try again, if she doesn't then you'll eventually find someone else to love.

After reading all your posts I have to say, this isn't love, this is obsession and it's getting out of hand.

You need to get some help.

Exactly. This is not love, this is obsession. I was guilty of it, most are.

Remember though, LESS IS MORE. The less you do, the more it speaks.

... and hang out with more male friends dammit.