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-   -   It's Christmas (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=295613)

  • Dec 25, 2008, 10:42 AM
    411Help
    It's Christmas
    And I know we're all wondering if we should call our exs to wish them a merry christmas. For me... I really miss my ex and want to hear her voice. I just need some people to tell me how stupid I am and shouldn't do it..

    OH, MERRY XMAS TO EVERYBODY!! I HOPE NO CONTACT IS GOING WELL FOR YOU GUYS.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 10:46 AM
    LifeChangesMan
    Your stupid and shouldn't do it. (haha!)

    Merry Christmas!!
  • Dec 25, 2008, 10:53 AM
    411Help

    Is it really that bad to call them to wish them a merry xmas though?
  • Dec 25, 2008, 10:55 AM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by 411Help View Post
    is it really that bad to call them to wish them a merry xmas though?!

    Yes, especially for you but also for her.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 10:57 AM
    411Help

    Even if we want them back?
  • Dec 25, 2008, 11:02 AM
    LifeChangesMan
    Hey!

    Don't you dare contact your ex.

    ESPECIALLY IF YOU WANT THEM BACK!!

    The fear of losing you is probably the only thing you could have to your advantage, do you think your ex is expecting a generic merry christmas text from you (the answer is yes) or will it strike her mind more if you don't send one... hmmm think about it...

    But trust me about the sun screen!

    Happy Holidays!

    Yours Truly,
    LCM
  • Dec 25, 2008, 11:52 AM
    wolfgangqpublic

    If you feel that contact is necessary, a passive option is the way to go. AND KEEP IT BRIEF.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 12:00 PM
    debdoes

    DON'T DO IT! Especially if you want her back!
    LifeChangesMan is right! She probably is expecting a text from you, and when she doesn't get it I'm sure that will make her wonder... I keep talking myself out of sending a text to my ex as well. If it was that important to him or if he cared at all, HE WOULD send me one.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 12:20 PM
    TrueFaith

    Stick to no contact we can talk ourselfd into anything but it still does not make it right
  • Dec 25, 2008, 12:53 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    The reason for no contact is to help you get over them, to stop wanting them back, contact and going to places that remind you of them, merely makes it take so much longer
  • Dec 25, 2008, 01:14 PM
    bb4

    I would avoid it, but IF you must, make it not as personal as a phone call, something like a text, or an email. But I say don't do it.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 01:24 PM
    411Help

    Wow, congratulations to myself.. I called her and ended up talking for an hour and a half. LET ME TELL EVERYBODY. ITS NOT WORTH IT. IT WILL ONLY SET YOU BACK.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 01:29 PM
    jmw0713

    Yes it will. Did the same thing. Only talked for 20 minutes... but still feel like crap. Found out things I didn't want to know. My fault for that though... I asked about it.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 02:07 PM
    kctiger

    I just sent my ex a text saying, "Merry Christmas." She responded, of course. I don't care about getting her back. I have known her for a long timie, and today is the one day that I think I am allowed to wish everyone I know a truly Merry Christmas. I am genuine about it, have no desire whatsoever to actually get her back... buh bye!!
  • Dec 25, 2008, 02:24 PM
    debdoes

    Hmmm... really kc? That makes me want to text my ex even more because what you said makes sense. But I won't, I think that would set me back again even more.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 02:31 PM
    kctiger

    I don't think anyone should try it unless they think they can handle it. My ex for some reason has come to the conclusion that she is better than me (or at least she acts like it), so I have no dillusions she will EVER like me again. I don't care though... her fault, not mine.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 02:40 PM
    debdoes

    I'm all over the place with this one. I guess I'm dillusional, sometimes... One minute I can't see him never being with me again, then the next I'm thinking there is no way I will ever hear from again! I think about how he has text me that we will never happen again, but then he called me, so ? You think it would be a really bad idea if I did text him merry Xmas? Probably... then I wonder if he would maybe text me. I know he lost his phone and all his contacts, he never actually remembered my phone number. Tonight is going to be a test for me, I have to work and I know the shots will be flowing!
  • Dec 25, 2008, 02:43 PM
    kctiger

    The shots will be flowing...

    You sound like my type of girl! :) Marry Christmas to you!
  • Dec 25, 2008, 02:43 PM
    liz28

    I don't feel it necessary to contact your ex wishing them a Merry Christmas unless the two of you remained friends, and if anything, ended on good terms.

    If your going wish them a Merry Christmas then why stop there? What about the rest of holidays? New Year's is coming up. Oh, what about the Fourth of July, Thanksgiving?

    I contacted 2 of my exes but only because were friends. I've others exes but I wouldn't wish them a merry nothing. It's not from being bitter but I've enough people to send seasoning greeting to.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 03:03 PM
    jmw0713

    Christmas/New Years has a more sentimental aspect to it. More than any of the other holidays, with the exception maybe Thanksgiving. I know that I have fond and happy memories of spending Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years in the past with my ex and both of our families together. Sadly new memories will not be made and those old memories will not be easily forgotten... but they are still there. Hence the difficulty with dealing with the ex's on the holidays.

    I second shots. Maybe some eggnog. Definitely some Jack or Brandy!
  • Dec 25, 2008, 03:05 PM
    411Help

    I can't believe I'm spending my christmas moping around. Pathetic.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 03:09 PM
    jmw0713

    You're not the only one bro, a lot of people are. The holidays are the roughest time of year for the recently single or people who have lost a loved one.
  • Dec 25, 2008, 03:11 PM
    kctiger

    From Thanksgiving to Valentines Day is brutal for us that are recently separated... especially for the ones that were dumped. :(
  • Dec 26, 2008, 04:32 PM
    debdoes

    I made it through yesterday without sending a text! Of course I didn't get one from him... no surprise there... Although I was VERY tempted. Especially after my 10th shot... good thing it was really busy at work and I had no time to send one. Because once the buzz came on, I wanted to send a nasty text, his sister was there and completely ignored me. So in the state I was in, it would not have been good!

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