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-   -   Love triangle, I love her but she doesn't like me back and it really hurts me (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=288432)

  • Dec 4, 2008, 03:37 PM
    DtheDevil
    Love triangle, I love her but she doesn't like me back and it really hurts me
    Hi all, I think I'm in a love triangle, where I love a girl who loves another guy, but that guy doesn't love her that much as I love her. My story began with this girl, she moved to my house to study in my town, as her parents were far away from her and her parents were also my parents' friends. So me and her lived under the same roof for like 3 months. I had some fun with her, I even slept with her once (no sex)but it was for only 30 minutes. She lived in my sis's room. At first, I wasn't that interested in her, but the more I get to know her, the more I like her. I've always been protecting her and helping her with every issue. But it seems that she's not interested in me. Then she went to different school from me and she fell in love with a guy. He's quite popular, no wonder, she likes him. I dun have anything, I'm seventeen years old, she's sixteen years old, and that guy is at the same age as her, he's more good looking than me, is more popular and everything. When she moved to another house, she mailed me that she missed me so much, that day I had big crush on her, I even cried when she said that. After some days I confessed to her that I like her and she said that it's so funny that I like her and she considers me as her friend only. Then she tried to avoid me, but I've always followed her, when she has some problems, it was my responsibility to be punished from her problems. Then my cousin has developed some feelings towards her and he can get to her house whenever he wants unlike me. Now, she's not avoiding me anymore, but still, she said she only wants me to be her neutral friend, not close anymore, when I heard that I cried the whole week, suffered from depression and had to see a psychologist. She was also sad when she was rejected by that guy... so I get to him and ing kneel in front of him and beg him to like her a bit... for at least 2 weeks, so he agreed and he asked : Why are you doing that when you love her 10 000 times than I do. OMG, I'm crazy into her, but I dun want her to be sad. My cousin even slept in her room few times. I'm getting jealous of them, how lucky these 2 guys are. You know, I would give my life for her, to me, my life is nothing compared to her. Her parents beated me, because they thought that I was the one who slept with her in her room,she asked me to say it that it was me... because she didn't want my cousin to have some problems. OMG, isn't this enough? I wanted to forget her but it's so hard, I know I won't ever get her, but I want to at least satisfy her and make her happy. Everyone said that I'm stupid and so... Her parents forbid me to see her and my parents also forbid me to see her. I'm really down now, I've never had a girlfriend and so... I love her, but she doesn't feel anything towards me, and it hurts me so much that I wish to kill myself and never exist. I cried every single day, when I call her she doesn't respond and when write a sms text to her she doesn't reply too and when my cousin write to her she reply so quickly. OMG, maaaan, I just want her to be at least my friend, I would be happy if she would ever hug me or hold my hand. It hurts me though... Í've even broke my arm when I tried to save her from a car accident, but it seems like she would never appreciate that what I'm doing to her. But that's fine, I dun need her to appreciate that I just want her to be my friend and stop ignoring me. When she was sick, I sold my mobile phone to buy her medicine, whoch was really expensive. I need some help, she still ignores me, I want to help if there's something what would help me to get over her. Or what would be better, how would I get her?
  • Dec 4, 2008, 03:52 PM
    TrueFaith

    You know the best way out of a Love triangel.


    Dont be part of it

    You want to kill your self? over a girl because she does not like you? are you really that weak? A your not gonna fight and get back on your feet? you just gonna give up like a wimp?? Yuck! you have as much self confidance as Cornackly depressed lemming!

    Dude you beged the other guy to like her?

    Man! What are you doing. She likes you only as a friend

    I would total distances myself from her.
    You have a serious crush on her.
    And it is going to keep on eating at you if you do not stop your actions right now

    What you have done is not healthy.. you know the reason why.. both parents have stop you from seeing her

    Its because You are acting like a Nutter!
    With major issues

    I would give my life for her? What typ of crap is that. Kid get your head out of your A@@ and out of this movie world you live in


    Yeah you love her? You don't love her its an Obsession!. and yeah it hurts that she does not want to be with you.. still does not mean you should act
    Like this

    You sold your phone to get her meds? Dude that's so pathetic.
    You are acting like a hurt lost puppy
    And that is not attractive!

    But for you to act like this? Come off it.

    You can forget her being your friend after the way you acted. you can't control your feelings



    But you can control how you ACT! and you my friend. acted like a total nut job. with an obsessive mind and a worped sence of reality

    So kid. Get your head back down to eath. Right.
    Stop talking to her
    Break of contact

    Before they call the police. And stop you from going near her.

    Don't think I'm being hard on you..
    We all hurt when someone does not give back our love.

    But you have No right to act the way you Have!
  • Dec 4, 2008, 05:01 PM
    Ruislip

    Hey dude... you've got it bad. There's no shame in that though so stop beating yourself up. You need to re focus. Look at yourself in the mirror an look into your eyes... Do you really like what you see? Think of your actions lately.. again ask yourself are you proud of them? If she was doing this stuff to you could you honestly take her seriously? Until you can answer NO to these Q's you should not even breathe in her direction! You need my young friend to get your seflf bsck to ground zero and work on becoming a more centred individual. She liked you once so there will be others who like you more in the future only if you create that space by growing and moving on! It's not easy but it is doable so Just do it! Young Sir and You'll be pleasantly surprised! :)...
  • Dec 4, 2008, 05:07 PM
    Alty

    She's a user. She asks you to do things for her that get you in trouble. Why do you love someone like that?

    You deserve to be with someone that loves you as much as you love them. She's not even good friendship material.

    Love hurts, especially when it isn't returned. You have to stop trying to contact her and get on with your life.

    As long as you try to remain friends, you'll never move on.

    No contact, heal, get therapy, move on.
  • Dec 4, 2008, 05:09 PM
    talaniman
    You definitely need a better way to deal with your feelings.

    Never make a person a priority in your life, while allowing them to make you an option in theirs.
  • Dec 4, 2008, 05:15 PM
    Alty

    Darnit Tal, I still have to spread the rep. I agree 100%.
  • Dec 5, 2008, 10:59 AM
    DtheDevil

    Yeah yeah, I know it's pathetic and it's not that I'm not trying to forget her... I still need some help
  • Dec 5, 2008, 11:04 AM
    kctiger

    Devil, I know exactly how you feel man. It takes awhile, but you need to realize you will get over this, and you MOST IMPORTANTLY need to realize your life is much more that just her. You aren't pathetic. You have learned how to love, which, believe it or not, is an accomplishment in itself. Life is hard, and without these small challenges we wouldn't learn anything. Why do we fall?? So we can learn to pick ourselves back up. You are a good guy, you had the capacity to love. That makes you special. Now you just need to realize that you are good enough for anyone. Learn to love yourself. No one is worth your life! Keep your chin up and believe in yourself!! Life will get better, trust me. Good things happen to good people, and you are a good person my friend.
  • Dec 5, 2008, 12:36 PM
    talaniman

    Read the stickies at the beginning of this forum, or click on the link in my signature. Let us know if it fits your situation.
  • Dec 5, 2008, 01:55 PM
    MrJaNgLeS7

    Hey man I know how you feel I thought I loved some one too but she didn't feel the same way about me so I forgot her I moved on and you need to do the same thing. After I moved on I found someone who I can say I love and she loves me back. Keep this in mind man there are more fish in the sea. Trust me man there is someone out there for you and only u. u just got to forget about her and go on with your life and the person that will love you will find u.
  • Dec 5, 2008, 03:37 PM
    TrueFaith

    Hey look nothing comes easy in this life
    We all have to go threw this.

    But trust me. It can only get better.

    Regards
  • Dec 6, 2008, 04:18 AM
    DtheDevil

    But I don't how much time it takes to get over, I'm having her in my mind every single seconds OMG, even now I'm thinking of her, when I'm at school, I'm also thinking of her... Do u know what would help me to forget her, and thanks all for advice
  • Dec 6, 2008, 05:33 AM
    talaniman

    Did you read the stickies?
  • Dec 7, 2008, 07:45 AM
    DtheDevil

    Yeah, I read them, today I met her with her boyfriend, OMG, I feel so jealous T.T.
  • Dec 7, 2008, 07:46 AM
    kctiger

    You met with her BF... why?
  • Dec 7, 2008, 10:44 AM
    DtheDevil

    I just met them by chance, I wanted to go to cinema to relieve my stress and depression, to forget about her, but I met her with her BF in cinema, how they were holding their hands,OMG, it hurts so much, it hurts... I can't describe the pain which I'm holding in my chest... I think I'm the worst bad lucker in the world, just when I tried to forget about her, I met her and her BF in the cinema, OMG... when I saw them I ran home quickly and cried along my way at home... I feel so embarrassed, so many people saw me
  • Dec 7, 2008, 01:41 PM
    Alty

    This isn't love, this is obsession. Only you can get through this but not if you keep thinking you have a chance.

    It really may be time to get therapy to help you through this. It doesn't seem like you are capable of doing this alone.
  • Dec 7, 2008, 02:46 PM
    talaniman
    Your putting way too much importance on her, and not enough on you.
  • Dec 7, 2008, 03:05 PM
    TrueFaith

    You think you have the worst luck in the world?

    Kid get some perspective
    There are people in this world
    That have lost there familys

    There homes
    There jobs

    Everything.

    And you say you have bad luck just because you met a girl that you like, and she is with a boyfriend?

    As I said before. Get your head back down to earth kid.

    Your life isn't that bad.

    Worst luck. HA!
    You have no idea what pain is
  • Dec 7, 2008, 09:21 PM
    Alty

    I agree True Faith, 100%. Loving someone who doesn't love you back isn't bad luck, it happens, to all of us! It's how you deal with it that matters.

    You can wallow in self pity (like you're doing) or move on, forget about her and find someone who cares about you as much as you care about her.

    Only you are holding yourself back from happiness, no one else.

    As long as you keep obsessing about this girl you don't have a future with anyone, even yourself.
  • Dec 8, 2008, 06:51 AM
    kctiger

    I know how you feel, and it does hurt. I think what you have to remember now is that it can't get any worse. This was probably the last thing you wanted to see, and you saw it. Does it suck? YES. It is absolutely painful and cuts you deep. The good news... you can only go up from here. You have pretty much hit rock bottom now, so as bad as the storm was, the center of it has passed. Clearer days will be ahead if you can be proactive enough to let this go and focus on your own life. This is the progression of life, people breaking up and getting with other people. It was bound to happen, now learn to accept that and start making yourself happy. Who is to say, that she doesn't walk into a movie theater a few months from now and you are with your new girlfriend... I am sure that would sting her a bit too. No one wants to see that, but it is reality.
  • Dec 9, 2008, 01:12 PM
    DtheDevil

    Well, I've chosen to go to study overseas, so I think I won't meet her anymore, which would help me a lot. It's also my first loving someone and also first time being rejected. At first, I didn't how it would feel, I didn't know that it would hurt this much. And thank you all for the advice.
  • Dec 10, 2008, 12:53 PM
    DtheDevil

    OMG, today I met with her again and she hug me and cried and said ", just find another girl, I can't take it seeing u being hurt because of me" hahhaha, she just talked to me and cried and hug me... omg... this is joke... hahha... I'm like a toy with her
  • Dec 10, 2008, 12:55 PM
    kctiger

    Get her out of your life man. She is trying to make you think she feels bad... Whatever! I would have just laughed in her face.
  • Dec 11, 2008, 01:53 PM
    DtheDevil

    Kctiger you're right, today she hurt me really bad. Why does she appear in front of me with her fake tears, when I was just about to forget her, OMG, why is she trying to harm me? Why is she toying with my feelings? Is that because I loved her too much? Are my feelings towards her a bad thing? Did it hurt her? OMG, I can't rid of her, I deleted her contact, everything, why must she always appear with her boyfriend in front of me, why is she always so? What bad things did I do to her? WHYYYYYYYYYY? OMG, I cried the whole night, have temperature and don't know what else. I want to have a happy Christmas. She destroyed my heart, played with my feelings, misused me, am I that bad person? Or what? But why do I still love her? Why? Even though I knew those tears were fake ones, I felt so... OMG, I need someone who would give me a shoulder on which I can cry.
  • Dec 11, 2008, 02:01 PM
    kctiger

    You are all right, trust me. Cry it out if you have to. I know it sucks, but these bad times don't last forever, and when they pass the good times are even sweeter!! Vent away my friend!
  • Dec 11, 2008, 02:10 PM
    DtheDevil

    OMG, I want to forget about her so hard, I dun want to have these emotions, it hurts, it hurts. It hurts bad... it hurts that bad that my personality is changing and everything, who would say that from a inexperienced, happy guy... become this person now. I wrote to her: " Don't toy with me anymore, I'm also a person with a soul, don't you feel bad doing these things to me? It hurts when you don't that what I'm feeling towards, but what hurts more, is that you're ruining my personality. I love you so much, yet, u still wanna hurt me".
  • Dec 11, 2008, 02:11 PM
    kctiger

    Quit talking to her man! She doesn't care. Do NOT let her win by showing that it hurts you. Screw her... do not let her win, period! Breathe and calm down a bit, I know it is hard, but you can do it.
  • Dec 11, 2008, 02:12 PM
    DtheDevil

    Yeah thanks I will do it, but you know, I still feel some love towards her, but it fades away day by day, so I'm happy about it. You were a big help, really.
  • Dec 11, 2008, 02:16 PM
    kctiger

    Dude, I know exactly what you are going through, trust me. It takes time, but it will get better. Life has a funny way of working things out... unpredictable, yes. But in the end, we will be much happier!
  • Dec 14, 2008, 03:16 AM
    DtheDevil

    Her boyfriend dumped her, that stupid bastard. OMG, I think it's harder to forget her, then to get her by hardworking. Now I will try my best to persuade her. I think I won't be hurt anymore, as now as I am, I am hurt at the highest level and can't be sadder anymore. So I will try haaaaaaaaaaard. I will never give up on her, until she will marry someone
  • Dec 17, 2008, 07:37 AM
    AlexLovesU
    I know how you feel man , and the solution is very simple.
    It worked for me and I hope it will work for you too.

    Ask some other girls out and hopefully you will keep in touch with one of them.Sooner or later you will forget about her... Other girls will make you forget about her, and who knows , if you get to love one of them , maybe they will love you back.
  • Dec 18, 2008, 10:25 AM
    DtheDevil

    OMG :( I broke my leg. I was talking with her and she said that she would love me back if I jumped out of the window (4th floor), because I said that I would do everything for her so she would like me back. I jumped, but still she doesn't love me. And she said that I'm a stupid retard. :( She lied to me. Why did I believe her? This Xmas and new Year I think I won't be able to go anywhere as my leg is.. . My friend know this and he cried in front of me, OMG. Things are getting more and more complicated, I've tried to like other girls, buy it is so hard. :(
  • Dec 18, 2008, 10:27 AM
    kctiger

    You jumped out of a window for her? Are you serious? Get professional help NOW! You are lucky I am not in front of you right now. She is not worth it, so quit letting her make you weaker than you are. You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for!!
  • Dec 18, 2008, 11:33 AM
    talaniman

    Just when you think... nevermind!
  • Dec 18, 2008, 11:41 AM
    TrueFaith

    You jumped out a window
    I'm sorry but that is really pathetic

    I really don't feel sorry for weak people like you
    I have been threw more than you can imagen. And I have always fought

    You disgust me boy
  • Jan 10, 2009, 06:41 PM
    DtheDevil

    I fought like hell, she is manipulating my love... my leg will be OK in a month, gosh, one sided love hurts, her boyfriend beat me up... he went to my house and beat me up... it sucks.. I hatethis world
  • Jan 10, 2009, 06:43 PM
    kctiger
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by DtheDevil View Post
    I fought like hell, she is manipulating my love.................my leg will be ok in a month, gosh, one sided love hurts, her bf beat me up....he went to my house and beat me up...it sucks..I hatethis world

    All right... now am starting to think this is all BS. I smell a rat!

    Either way, you need to grow up, and quit acting like this. If this is true, then leave her alone. You are borderline stalkerish...

    Get some help man, none of us on here are getting any sense into you.
  • Jan 10, 2009, 06:54 PM
    Alty

    Quote:

    You are borderline stalkerish...
    I think we've crossed into full on stalker.

    DtheDevil, if you aren't a troll then you need serious help. You are letting the supposed love of someone ruin your entire life. This isn't love, this is obsession, and you need help!

    Rejection is part of life, get used to it, this won't be the last time. You either suck it up, move on, get over it, or you end up hurting yourself and others around you.

    You are the only one who has the power to change this, so buck up and do it already. No more pity party, it's time to grow a spine and start living your life without her in it.

    As for jumping out a window, what did you think that would accomplish, her pity love?

    Really, get professional help!
  • Jan 10, 2009, 06:58 PM
    TrueFaith

    Yeah I think this sounds like b s as well
    You should grow up

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