Ask Me Help Desk - Does she miss me?

Does she miss me?

I just have one last question for everyone. I have been separated from my ex for almost 4 months, she is away at college and her boyfriend of almost 3 months is here in town with me. Is it at all possible that her love for her new boyfriend could be a projection of what she wanted from me. He, as I know, is very nice and giving and caring. Im not saying she doesn't love, but could they be in-love. After 3 years of us being together she started to date him exactly 1 month after we broke up and like I said before, its long distance. What exactly I'm trying to ask here is how could she move on to a new boyfriend so soon and is it a rebound. And could she possibly start to miss us?

It most probably seems to be a rebound.

She probably does miss you, but the new B/f is a good way to keep herself distracted.

Just move on. I know its hard... my situation isn't much better... but mine is less then a week old.

After 4 moutns... yea. Its time to move on... she has.

Keep your chin up man, and keep yourself distracted.

The only way she will miss you is if you make yourself scarce. Something I wish I would do myself. She probably knows you still want her and that is a turn off. The only way to make things better is to move on. She'll never feel the loss if you do not even if she does not want to get back together.

Hi CF-96: Sounds like your really analizing this and I'd be doing the same thing but it's not a perfect science yet and we can never be sure. One thing we can be sure of is the fact that acting on any theory in this case would not be smart,

Best to find a soccer ball, name it Wilson and pretend your on a sunny island thousands of miles form her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jorgy22

It most probably seems to be a rebound.

She probably does miss you, but the new B/f is a good way to keep herself distracted.

Just move on. I know its hard.... my situation isn't much better... but mine is less then a week old.

After 4 moutns... yea. Its time to move on..... she has.

Keep your chin up man, and keep yourself distracted.

Yes I agree completely and I believe in the fact that if we are meant to get back together then destiny will bring us back in eachother's arms, if not then so be it, it will suck, but its meant to be.

Quote:

Originally Posted by statictable

Hi CF-96: Sounds like your really analizing this and I'd be doing the same thing but it's not a perfect science yet and we can never be sure. One thing we can be sure of is the fact that acting on any theory in this case would not be smart,

Best to find a soccer ball, name it Wilson and pretend your on a sunny island thousands of miles form her.

That's the scary part, no body knows, she could really never ever think of me and completely love him or it could be for show, but I have come to live by "hope for the best, expect the worst."

No she doesn't miss you! Your in her past now. Perhaps you should put her in yours!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skell

No she doesnt miss you! Your in her past now. Perhaps you should put her in yours!

OK I understand that, but what I don't get is how someone can push you away like that and act like nothing happened. I'm just trying to analize the situation, that's all. I don't feel like making the same mistake ever again.

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazyfighter96

ok i understand that, but what i dont get is how someone can push you away like that and act like nothing happened. im just trying to analize the situation, thats all. i dont feel like making the same mistake ever again.

I think that's what most of us are trying to figure out is how they can just move into another relationship like nothing ever happened between the two of you. I know I wonder about it daily.

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Originally Posted by MissingHim2Much

I think thats what most of us are trying to figure out is how they can just move into another relationship like nothing ever happened between the two of you. I know I wonder about it daily.

Yea and I still wake up just about everyday thinking wow, how did this happen. I sometimes feel the need to call her and talk to her, but none of it will make a difference. The future can be a scary thing, who knows what can happen, that's why we need to cherish today.

Quote:

Originally Posted by daveycool75

The only way she will miss you is if you make yourself scarce. Something I wish I would do myself. She probably knows you still want her and that is a turn off. The only way to make things better is to move on. She'll never feel the loss if you do not even if she does not want to get back together.

I see what you are saying, she knows sometimes I look at her myspace and she always puts how much she loves her new boyfriend all over it to make me jealous. I know this whole isn't an exact science, but I'm just trying figure out what my next step will be.

I think she took the next step already and you should take yours. For her to do what she is doing is immature and believe me it will bite her down the road.

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazyfighter96

she always puts how much she loves her new boyfriend all over it to make me jealous.

The fact that you think she does it to make you jealous says a lot about you, nothing about her. I'm guessing she does it to let the world know how much she loves her boyfriend.

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazyfighter96

im just trying figure out what my next step will be.

I'd say beat it on down the line.

A lot of us are wondering how an ex can move on so quickly, but I think if we understood it we would do it ourselves! Maybe its not for us to ever know.

Different for girls though isn't it. They can move on easier than us. That's how I've seen it over the years.

Quote:

Originally Posted by madaman

Alot of us are wondering how an ex can move on so quickly, but I think if we understood it we would do it ourselves! Maybe its not for us to ever know.

I think they move on quickly because if we want to believe it or not they have been moving on for months before they actually move on if that makes sense.

Me and my ex had been back and forth for months she kept saying she was having doubts etc... but blamed it all on herself. Whenever I took responsibility for anything she would counter with what I was doing shouldn't be as big an issue as it was. I think for me the worst thing I did was allow my life to become unbalanced while she maintained a better balance with her friends etc..

Quote:

Originally Posted by ordinaryguy

The fact that you think she does it to make you jealous says a lot about you, nothing about her. I'm guessing she does it to let the world know how much she loves her boyfriend.

I'd say beat it on down the line.

I agree with you there, but like I said before, she explodes over it, she is letting me know that she has found someone better and she doenst even know him that well to be in love.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kuulski

I think she took the next step already and you should take yours. For her to do what she is doing is immature and believe me it will bite her down the road.

Amen to that man, I am completely agreeing with you there, she is playing a game and its middle school crap. I'm not going to put myself on the same level and you are so right, its going to bite her in the end.

Comment on kuulski's post

Agree!

I know how you feel, I've been there. How do know so much about her relationship, and her guy? You need stop with the interest in her relationship. The more you think about her, and whether she is thinking of you, or missing you, its just going to eat you from the inside out. Its been 4 months, and your concerned that she isn't thinking of you. So what if she isn't! You need to starting thinking about yourself, and build your life without her.

Her relationship probably was on the rebound, but it seems it has become something more. Don't beat yourself up over it (If you are). Your single RIGHT? Go have some fun, and start thinking of number 1... e.g YOU.

Comment on Sean23's post

Good idea.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sean23

I know how you feel, ive been there. How do know so much about her relationship, and her guy? You need stop with the interest in her relationship. The more you think about her, and whether she is thinking of you, or missing you, its just going to eat you from the inside out. Its been 4 months, and your concerned that she isnt thinking of you. So what if she isnt! You need to starting thinking about urself, and build your life without her.

Her relationship probably was on the rebound, but it seems it has become something more. Dont beat urself up over it (If you are). Your single RIGHT? Go have some fun, and start thinking of number 1... e.g YOU.

I know the most important person right now is me. These 4 months have gone by so fast, I can't believe it. Its just hard for me to let go 100% and the thought of her letting go kills me inside.

I was in a relationship for 6 years my friend. Ended about 9 weeks ago. She broke up with me, and still don't really know why. I was blinded by love for about 6 weeks after she ended it, and I wanted her back so much. But I'm all right now, not 100%... but I'm better then I was, and I'm definitely thinking of her less.

Just be strong, you'l find someone else that will make your ex look like a stepping stone.

:)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sean23

I was in a relationship for 6 years my friend. Ended about 9 weeks ago. She broke up with me, and still dont really know why. I was blinded by love for about 6 weeks after she ended it, and I wanted her back so much. But im alright now, not 100%... but im better then I was, and im definitly thinking of her less.

Just be strong, you'l find someone else that will make your ex look like a stepping stone.

:)

Im really sorry to hear that, I think the reason Im having so much trouble letting go is because I was in a huge comfort zone with her and when she left I fell flat on my face, I couldn't do anything for a good 2 months, I still think about her everyday, but not as much and I don't get as sad. What hurt me the most was not ending our relationship, it was seeing her move on to another guy and now loving him. I do realize that her relationship with him shouldn't concern me and it doesn't matter what they do in their lives together. But, like I always say, it was meant to be. And if her and I are meant to get back together, fate will bring us back together, but if not then thanks for the memories. The scariest thing is the future.

All I can is you never know what the future holds. And don't even worry about trying to find someone else right now. You just have to battle through this, like me, and like most other people on here. Do you really think your girlfriends new relationship will last in the long run? Maybe... but maybe not. It doesn't matter. All I know is you just have to focus on yourself, and let time do the rest. Just don't wait for her, because it may never happen.

Be smart, be strong, and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sean23

All I can is you never know what the future holds. And dont even worry about trying to find someone else right now. You just have to battle through this, like me, and like most other people on here. Do you really think your girlfriends new relationship will last in the long run? Maybe... but maybe not. It doesnt matter. All I know is you just have to focus on yourself, and let time do the rest. Just dont wait for her, because it may never happen.

Be smart, be strong, and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Very true my friend, well said. In the long run I do not think it will last for her, but as you said it doesn't matter. I believe all situations will be resolved but in god's time not ours. Make sure you hang on as well and stay strong, your relationship was twice as long as mine. Good luck buddy.