This is becoming very irritating
Ok, I'm perfectly fine. Really. I've been ridiculously busy. My attitude about life is very positive, I'm good. I've met so many girls since my last ex. A decent amount of them have liked me too. Ready... here's what's driving me insane. I can't stop comparing them to my ex. Her negative traits were heartbreaking and I have too much pride to go back to someone that would even attempt to treat me the way she did, but man those good traits were intoxicating. She was funny as hell (I mean really clever). Extremely well read and intelligent. Very, very cute. The funniest, no... the smartest, no... the prettiest, no, but man her specific chemistry spoke to me. Ok, scales of justice. She wasn't stable (mentally, or otherwise). Half the time, I didn't even like how she made me feel (worried, irritated, pressured, unappreciated, etc.). It didn't feel like there was enough room in the relationship for me.
I'm not a superficial person. I take the time to really get to know people. At the same time, I really only form strong bonds with like 1% of the people I meet. Probably not abnormal, but it holds true with the opposite sex as well. Yeah sure, I could date any number of girls, but I know pretty early on whether I'd be serious about them or not. I just don't want to waste anyone's time, or hurt anyone's feelings. Damn. I don't think about her all of the time anymore. It's only every once in a while now. Despite everything, I get this urge to contact her, in the hopes that she has changed. I know. She hasn't, at least more than likely she hasn't. I'm not idealizing her. I don't need therapy. I just know, that some of her traits are always going to charm me. What does one do in my present situation?