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-   -   How to let go (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=161057)

  • Dec 9, 2007, 07:22 PM
    spartan24018
    How to let go
    How do you try NC when the girl still wants to be friends with you?
  • Dec 9, 2007, 09:54 PM
    AustProd6
    Say no thanks, you have enough friends. Have a nice life.
    :-)
    Simple really.
  • Dec 9, 2007, 10:18 PM
    Wondergirl
    You don't TRY NC. You DO NC.

    NC means NC. Don't answer. Don't even say goodbye. Walk away.
  • Dec 9, 2007, 11:11 PM
    Skell
    Wondergirl got it spot on. There isn't no trying. It's a done deal. Walk away and tell her to do likewise. You aren't interested in her friendship. That went out the door when she left you.
  • Dec 10, 2007, 09:20 AM
    talaniman
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by spartan24018
    How do you try NC when the girl still wants to be friends with you?

    As the others have pointed out, you DO no contact, and what she wants is no longer your problem, your healing, is the top priority.
  • Dec 10, 2007, 08:18 PM
    spartan24018
    Update: I'm trying no contact with her but it's only been for a few hours. She's been flirting a lot with another guy so that should keep her occupied. I'm just going to have nothing to do with her for a while and get my head back into place. Can anybody out there tell me how could girls break a guy's heart this bad, and move on so quickly?
  • Dec 10, 2007, 09:16 PM
    AustProd6
    Turn the tables around buddy. Seems she has control.
  • Dec 10, 2007, 09:29 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by spartan24018
    I'm just going to have nothing to do with her for a while

    No, not "for a while." For good. Forever.
  • Dec 10, 2007, 11:15 PM
    chave
    my x is the same, I said nc but kept kalling me, and stupid me answering his calls. But now he just gave up on us and said that it was OK. That he was not going to kall me no more, and... I don't know I miss him.
  • Dec 11, 2007, 07:08 AM
    talaniman
    If you mean why do people change, and want to do something different? They just do as there is a big world to explore. Your inexperience with dealing with your feelings has a lot to do with your pain also, add the expectation of a relationship lasting forever, and you have heartbreak, and of course, we are in shock about it too. Most times our exes have been think of leaving for a while before they tell us, so they have had time to get used to the idea, and are seldom in the shock we are, so it seems as if they are moving on more quick.
  • Dec 11, 2007, 03:25 PM
    spartan24018
    Update: I think the girl I was talking about could be leading her life into trouble. I think she likes this guy who has a reputation for using and abusing girls. I'm still friends with her (even though I haven't been in contact with her for a few days), should I help her out?
  • Dec 11, 2007, 03:28 PM
    Wondergirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by spartan24018
    Update: I think the girl I was talking about could be leading her life into trouble. I think she likes this guy who has a reputation for using and abusing girls. I'm still friends with her (even though I haven't been in contact with her for a few days), should I help her out?

    You don't give up, do you!

    (How are you friends with her? I missed that part.)
  • Dec 11, 2007, 08:00 PM
    talaniman
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by spartan24018
    Update: I think the girl I was talking about could be leading her life into trouble. I think she likes this guy who has a reputation for using and abusing girls. I'm still friends with her (even though I haven't been in contact with her for a few days), should I help her out?

    How is it your business?? Who made you her guardian angel?? Nice try, but stay out of her business. Did you actually think someone to tell you to go rescue the damsel in distress, and be a hero, and live happily ever after?:rolleyes:
  • Dec 11, 2007, 08:53 PM
    spartan24018
    Thanks talaniman for smacking me around a little bit, that helped. I'm sorry I couldn't move on as quickly as many of you guys would like me to, it's just a hard thing to do. It really hurts a lot...
  • Dec 11, 2007, 11:06 PM
    talaniman
    We know it does, and from being here as long as I have, you aren't the first one to try and rationalise an excuse to see the ex. You'll be okay, got any more tales of woe before I call it a day. Trust me it won't be long before you'll read these post and laugh your butt off.
  • Dec 12, 2007, 12:15 PM
    George_1950
    It seems that she isn't thinking about your heart.
  • Dec 12, 2007, 12:31 PM
    braingirl23
    Wats NC mean
  • Dec 12, 2007, 12:44 PM
    George_1950
    NC = no contact
  • Dec 17, 2007, 04:43 PM
    spartan24018
    Now she asks me what's wrong because I'm ignoring her and she's been involved with a lot of other guys, it just makes me really jealous. But I try not to show it. Why is she doing that?
  • Dec 17, 2007, 08:16 PM
    friend4u178
    She's trying to keep you as her backstop. That's what they do when they say they still want to be friends.

    You won't start to heal until you LET GO and start doing NC , don't get stuck on square one. I know its easy to say but it is a must for you to start your healing process.

    DON'T EVER be someone's backup , makes you look weak in her eyes as well.

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