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Originally Posted by darkdays

Don't worry, I definitely will. I've lost my trust in women to be stable enough to have a family with.

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You already have four kids! How do you support them? Relationships shouldn't always mean having children. How in the worl do you think these innocent childre are feeling? You talk more about your feelings and only mention your kids when you are asked. You complain about the way you feel, but how do your children feel? Who supports them? How often do you see them?

Anyone can get a woman pregnant, but it takes a real man to be a Daddy. You are starting to tick me off dark. :mad:

When you say family, not sure what you mean, anymore. My dear friends are my family, too.

Priorities again. You and your son are family. Without her to confuse you.

Work on yourself, man.
Take the time.

Be that together person and look for that in others.

Only repeat good things, and look for more or them.

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

You already have four kids! How do you support them? Relationships shouldn't always mean having children. How in the worl do you think these innocent childre are feeling? You talk more about your feelings and only mention your kids when you are asked. You complain about the way you feel, but how do your children feel? Who supports them? How often do you see them?

Anyone can get a woman pregnant, but it takes a real man to be a Daddy. you are starting to tick me off dark. :mad:

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And your starting to tick me off Kat, and I don't really care for your codemning demeaner at all.
First of all, Im not on here because I have issues with my kids, because I don't. I came onto the relationships board to talk about the relationship, not my kids. I don't think I need to, I don't need to keep bringing up my kids to you to prove that I love and care for them to please you.
I support my kids, and I wanted them to have a family. I am the one in these relationships that was committed to giving them a family. I never left them, they left. I am a real man and a very good father, so where ever you get your little inclination that Im not, well, it's not coming from me. It seems you have personal issues.
Any woman can get knocked up, but it takes a real woman to give their child a family.

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Originally Posted by vanheart

When you say family, not sure what you mean, anymore. My dear friends are my family, too.

Priorities again. You and your son are family. Without her to confuse you.

Work on yourself, man.
Take the time.

Be that together person and look for that in others.

Only repeat good things, and look for more or them.

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When I say family, I mean my children growing up with their mother and father together. That's a family that they deserve. Having children and then breaking up is to me a dishonor to having the child in the first place.

Like I said, learning from things.

The things that don't go as planned. And why.

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Originally Posted by vanheart

Like I said, learning from things.

The things that dont go as planned. And why.

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Exactly, and that's why I don't want any more children. I've learned not to trust women as far as having a child with them.
Then, if the relationship breaks, no children are affected.
Women don't seem to me to be able to carry on life long commitments, and that's what I've learned from experience.

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Originally Posted by darkdays

And your starting to tick me off Kat, and I don't really care for your codemning demeaner at all.
First of all, Im not on here because I have issues with my kids, because I don't. I came onto the relationships board to talk about the relationship, not my kids. I don't think I need to, as a matter of fact I don't need to keep bringing up my kids to you to prove that I love and care for them to please you.
I support my kids, and I wanted them to have a family. I am the one in these relationships that was commited to giving them a family. I never left them, they left. I am a real man and a very good father, so where ever you get your little inclination that Im not, well, it's not coming from me. It seems you have personal issues.
Any woman can get knocked up, but it takes a real woman to give their child a family.

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My four kids are grown and living productive lives. My husband and I were always there for them. The had a stable homelife. A stable homelife is where the mother and father put their kids first. We aren't the ones here asking for help you are and you just seem to go on and on and on about how you feel and what's good for you. You also cannot take constructive criticism. Good luck.

You say you signed on here about your relationship, not to talk about kids.

Then talk about family.

Our whole existence is about relationships. From the day were able to formulate one. And the ones we have after, and how we went about them.

Concentrate on the things that matter most. Again priorities.

You got a new job right? And a new son?

Change is good.

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

My four kids are grown and living productive lives. My husband and I were always there for them. The had a stable homelife. A stable homelife is where the mother and father put their kids first. We aren't the ones here asking for help you are and you just seem to go on and on and on about how you feel and whats good for you. You also cannot take constructive criticism. Good luck.

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And I applaud you and your husband for doing what was right. Raising your children together. That's exactly throughout this whole thread I've been talking about and is pretty much the whole point. Trust me, if I didn't have a child with her, I would have never thought twice about the breakup. My whole persistence in trying to save this relationship was to give my child the family he deserves.
But, because of her immature attitude and lack of morals, it's impossible to give him that. When my ex-wife and I had our first born, I was instantaneously committed to doing what was right. And as far as any problems her and I would face in our relationship, my commitment says to work things out and evolve our lives together so not only can we have a better relationship, but our children have a solid foundation on which to grow up properly and happily in a secure family.
When my ex-girlfriend got pregnant, I made the same commitment.
I never had casual sex to any woman. It was love and commitment, so it wasn't like I was just out messing around.
It was them that couldn't maintain the commitment, not me. Understand?
As you and your husband had made that commitment, and you apparently know what it takes, so have I. But it takes two, doesn't it.
I did all I could do.

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Originally Posted by vanheart

You say you signed on here about your relationship, not to talk about kids.

Then talk about family.

Our whole existence is about relationships. From the day were able to formulate one. And the ones we have after, and how we went about them.

Concentrate on the things that matter most. Again priorities.

You got a new job right? And a new son?

Change is good.

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I am. Im putting the impossible past behind and moving on. New job, yes. My son, well he's two years old.

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Originally Posted by darkdays

And I applaud you and your husband for doing what was right. Raising your children together. That's exactly throughout this whole thread I've been talking about and is pretty much the whole point. Trust me, if I didn't have a child with her, I would have never thought twice about the breakup. My whole persistence in trying to save this relationship was to give my child the family he deserves.
But, because of her immature attitude and lack of morals, it's impossible to give him that. When my ex-wife and I had our first born, I was instantaneously commited to doing what was right. And as far as any problems her and I would face in our relationship, my commitment says to work things out and evolve our lives together so not only can we have a better relationship, but our children have a solid foundation on which to grow up properly and happily in a secure family.
When my ex-girlfriend got pregnant, I made the same exact commitment.
I never had casual sex to any woman. It was love and commitment, so it wasn't like I was just out messing around.
It was them that couldn't maintain the commitment, not me. Understand?
As you and your husband had made that commitment, and you apparently know what it takes, so have I. But it takes two, doesn't it.
I did all I could do.

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How many children do you have by the ex wife, ex girlfriend?

Just not the right women for you.

Maybe that's the whole thing. Need a woman & a family to complete.

Start with yourself first.

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Originally Posted by vanheart

Just not the right women for you.

Maybe thats the whole thing. Need a woman & a family to complete.

Start with yourself first.

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Exactly, couldn't agree more with that first sentence.

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Originally Posted by Kitkat22

How many children do you have by the ex wife, ex girlfriend?

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I have two sons and a daughter with my ex-wife. They are 12, 7, and 5
I have one son with my ex-girlfriend. He is 2

Very easy to blame the female for being flawed, but what's telling is the only thing they have in common is you. Hmm, wonder what factor that plays in the equation? Or what it says in your choice of females? Either way, it could stand a bit of honest evaluation.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

Very easy to blame the female for being flawed, but whats telling is the only thing they have in common is you. Hmm, wonder what factor that plays in the equation? Or what it says in your choice of females?? Either way, it could stand a bit of honest evaluation.

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Couldn't have said better! I mean that!:)

Hello?

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Originally Posted by vanheart

Hello?

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Sorry Van did I grab a thread?

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Originally Posted by talaniman

Very easy to blame the female for being flawed, but whats telling is the only thing they have in common is you. Hmm, wonder what factor that plays in the equation? Or what it says in your choice of females?? Either way, it could stand a bit of honest evaluation.

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Well Tal, in all honesty, I have evaluated it.
With my ex-wife, it was more of me working a lot and not giving her the time she needed, but at the time I had a lot going on with the new house and everything else we had, so I had to work a lot. She didn't want to work, so it was all my burden. Then she spent too much money at one time and put us into some debt. To save what we had, I had to cut her off all credit cards and bank accounts. If she wanted money, she had to ask me. I couldn't trust her. Needless to say, she got tired of that and left.
My ex-girlfriend had issues I knew nothing about until after she was already pregnant with our son. Too many issues to go into right now, it would be a book to write

Nope. I meant hellooooooooowww??