Ask Me Help Desk - Nice guys finish last

Quote:

Originally Posted by huno

So I am still wondering why you ladies won't just go up to these guys and start conversations yourselves. We are in modern times now! Women need to step up and take the reins!

Just cause it would be REALLY nice if THEY would just be able to do that. Very much appreciated indeed! :)

We can do it if we want to (sometimes!), but it would be better the other way around. Can't explain it better, but yeah, it would be better. :rolleyes:

Yeah, I know... everybody says that.. modern times, bla bla bla... but still.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

Just cause it would be REALLY nice if THEY would just be able to do that. Very much appreciated indeed! :)

We can do it if we want to (sometimes!), but it would be better the other way around. Can't explain it better, but yeah, it would be better. :rolleyes:

Yeah, I know... everybody says that.. modern times, bla bla bla... but still.

No, I get it; I have female friends who absolutely will NOT talk to a guy first.

"I can't do that, I'm the GIRL!"

Well, if I could go back to the past and change my shyness I would, because I could have saved myself a lot of grief. I lost a lot of golden opportunities because of it.

I remember my first crush... this girl was GORGEOUS. Just stunningly beautiful, to this day I still think about her. I first saw her in the 9th grade, we had health class together. Anyway, we would always stare at each other in class but I could NOT talk to her to save my life; any time I passed her by in the halls or in class we'd look at each other. She even once sat nearby with her friends, said, "Oh, there's huno!" and they all turned and giggled.

The signs were obvious.

In the 10th grade we had P.E. and it was the same thing. One day, though, through some miracle of god I managed to compliment her; just a few sentences, nothing more. The next day, she came to ME and started asking about me, my classes, what I did, who my friends were and all that.

This went on for a while, and her friends would start smiling at me and all that. She'd talk to my friends about me. Join up with me to play in P.E. Meet me after class. All that.

This girl gave me the loaded gun--all I had to do was pull the trigger.

Of course, I didn't... :( :( :( and of course, she moved on. I spent the rest of high school trying to win her back, but it was far too late.

Let this be a lesson to all you shy guys out there: quit obsessing. Start acting. You get a short window of time and after that's over, it is OVER. Staring, wishing, hoping, pleading gets you nowhere. Move. Talk. Live, laugh, love. And when you get signals, ACT on them; don't sit there wondering what they might mean, if they were meant for you--screw all that. Just go for it.

Worst thing that can happen: she politely says "No thanks" and you move on.

--huno

P.S.: no, wait--the worst thing that can happen is you never ask her out and she ends up bitter, like kristynn. :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by huno

P.S.: no, wait--the worst thing that can happen is you never ask her out and she ends up bitter, like kristynn. :D

:( :( :( I regret some things too. Actually, my biggest regret has something to do with this. It's sad... Same as you, huno. :(

Now, do you understand why?

Well I think you can start by taking the initiative, kristynn. Just throw yourself out there. I imagine Canada's progressive, probably more so than the U.S.: be the one to initiate, to instigate, to converse!

Quote:

Originally Posted by huno

Well I think you can start by taking the initiative, kristynn. Just throw yourself out there. I imagine Canada's progressive, probably more so than the U.S.: be the one to initiate, to instigate, to conversate!

I am, I really am! But not always, and not when it's most needed :rolleyes:; and it's crazy how they become shy/intimidated/whatever that I just feel bad myself in the end. :rolleyes: Seriously...

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

Just cause it would be REALLY nice if THEY would just be able to do that. Very much appreciated indeed! :)

We can do it if we want to (sometimes!), but it would be better the other way around. Can't explain it better, but yeah, it would be better. :rolleyes:

Yeah, I know... everybody says that.. modern times, bla bla bla... but still.

Exactly! :D

Google David D'Angelo and subscribe to his mailings. Also has a downloadable book and program on CD. Mailings are free others cost.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ramblinguy

Google David D'Angelo and subscribe to his mailings. Also has a downloadable book and program on CD. Mailings are free others cost.

What is this?

What for?

I have wondered this for a long time. I even had an experiment. For 3 months I trweated every girl I met like complete . I was mean. Dry. I was horrrible (I didn't beaat them or anything). I got more friggen action and free dinners in that 3 months than in my WHOLE LIFE. I have asked other girls and they say it is the drama behind having a mean BF. I personally think the following makes sense:

A guy beats his GF and to make up for it. Buys her a puppy. There is no between. Either the guys is really bad or he is extra sweet. The girls only react the extra sweet and forget about why he is being extra sweet in the first place.

Nice guys do finish last, however, they finish last to a girl that does not deserve them. A girl who will choose an over you is not a girl you want at all. When you actually do find a girl that will choose you over an... then you finish more than first... you are on top of the world.

Nice guys develop great 'karma' and social network. S eventually become known as just that, s. people won't want to work with him or talk to him and he will have a trophy girl that can't stick up for herself.

Nice girls also finish last. Find a nice girl... if one is actually out there

Krystinn---this thought was originally intended for Zooropa1985. Sorry. The site I referred to is one that is intended to get guys to understand that women don't stay for wusses. Interesting reading. You should check it out, anyway.

Lol don't worry my friend, I don't need any help when it comes to the ladeez, was just wondering what others thought?

I don't know why so many girls like "bad boys" I just knowthat not every girl is like that. But nice guys don't finish last, because they will get a nice girl who will be there through everything. Nice guys get the girls that will stick around

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrennaBear

I don't know why so many girls like "bad boys"

Well, my theory is that girls like masculinity, strength, and ambition. But most girls confuse masculinity with stupidity, strength with drunken aggression, and ambition with the desire to hold the record for most tequila shots downed in the frat.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrennaBear

I just knowthat not every girl is like that. But nice guys don't finish last, because they will get a nice girl who will be there through everything. Nice guys get the girls that will stick around

Yes, but the problem is the number of nice girls is also dwindling. See, at one point there existed a surplus of nice guys and girls. People naturally want what they perceive as valuable and scarce, and so the nice guys and girls were slowly abandoned for morons and cheap sluts. These people have children and raise them to be morons and sluts, while the nice guys and girls, once abundant and in control of society, began to produce less and less offspring, thinning the pool of decent, law-abiding people in society.

Right now, we're in the peak of that downswing into social despair. My hope is that, eventually, nice guys and girls will be as scarce as the bottom-feeding chimps you all call "bad boys" once were and society'll be back to normal.

I hope it happens soon... I'm tired of being passed up for gang members in Escalades.

Nice guys finish. Who cares when. My best friend and I are nice guys who are drilling away at college now. Our old friends, who aren't nice guys, are drop-outs who are literally in jail or stuck raising kids with a wife that they don't love or care about.