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-   -   We have a rocky relationship or what? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=378132)

  • Sep 8, 2009, 11:00 AM
    amicon
    What next indeed?you ve tried two ways of communicating with her and neither got a response.she s moved on is my take on this.sorry.
  • Sep 8, 2009, 02:19 PM
    harriejansen

    She answered my mail: Hi, thanks for the info, regards, F

    Now that is a short answer! Tomorrow I'll try to call again.
  • Sep 8, 2009, 02:30 PM
    twomommyshell

    There must be a reason there is trust issues. You must consider your partner when being in a relationship. Trust is everything. Giving up to easy is not good ether relationships take allot of work.
  • Sep 10, 2009, 11:55 AM
    harriejansen

    So far attempts to contact have been futile... I feel OK anyway, doing a lot of sports etc.

    Just sent her a sms: Hi I am in town these days maybe we can have a drink, would like to meet again

    And she silent... I drove past her house, she is in town, but what can I do?
  • Sep 10, 2009, 12:41 PM
    amicon

    Not a lot the ball s in her court and either she gets in touch or she doesn't.its that simple.
  • Sep 11, 2009, 03:35 AM
    harriejansen

    Well, I have my answers! I tried to call her today, she didn't answer, so I called again and then sent her a message, please answer, she then sent me a message: what part of me not wanting to see you or talk to you do you not understand! And don't dare to come here because I will take measures.

    ?? Well, I needed this to be able to move on. I am flabbergasted really by so much agressiveness. Thanks guys!
  • Sep 11, 2009, 04:55 AM
    amicon

    There s your answer and now you can get your life back for real.all the best.
  • Sep 12, 2009, 06:12 AM
    harriejansen

    Wauw today I am having a really bad day... it is true that contact sets you back...

    I can still not grasp why she is so aggressive, guess I shouldn't think about it and get myself back on my feet again, really hard today.
  • Sep 12, 2009, 06:29 AM
    amicon
    Yes feeling the way you are today is understandable-thats why no contact is the best thing.I don't think dwelling upon how she feels is a good for you-hard as this sounds you should move on now.
  • Sep 12, 2009, 06:29 AM
    N0help4u

    Yeah that is why it is bad to contact it is merely a set back and accomplished nothing.
    She may have felt she needed the aggressiveness to be assertive to make sure you got the message without question.
  • Sep 13, 2009, 12:29 PM
    harriejansen

    Hi friends, have had a bad weekend but I feel I am getting better. Maybe it wasn't that bad to try the contact, at least I have a clear answer.

    I still can't understand her need to be so incredibly rude. I know I am delusional probably, but to be that rude means she must be hurt? It is not like I have been bombarding her with messages or something like that.
  • Sep 13, 2009, 01:13 PM
    amicon

    Yes you have an answer-and whether she s hurt is no longer important.time to move on now.look after you and heal.
  • Sep 13, 2009, 06:12 PM
    talaniman

    I don't think she is hurt, or was rude.

    I thought you could handle rejection because you had nothing to lose?
  • Sep 13, 2009, 07:16 PM
    harriejansen

    Haha yes Tal, I thought I could handle it. I think I can but I felt the blow!

    And I do think it is not necessary to be rude and threatening. Anyway, I have difficulty with this, have to get it out of my mind.
  • Sep 13, 2009, 07:59 PM
    talaniman

    That's what happens when you push and don't take the hints a female gives to be nice, and let you down easy. You kept pushing and she got harsh, no biggie. Now you know.
  • Sep 14, 2009, 02:00 AM
    harriejansen

    Well, I am very likely to bump into her sooner or later, what then? All my other exes I always talk to?
  • Sep 14, 2009, 03:17 AM
    amicon
    Should you bump into her say hello and walk away.thats all it takes.
  • Sep 16, 2009, 12:53 AM
    harriejansen

    Just venting a little bit. I am still waking up with her in my mind, several times a night. It is hard to move on without knowing what exactly went wrong. I am sitting here 300 metres from her house, I must admit I have drove by, even have seen her sitting in her balcony, alone, the weekend. In a couple of days I will leave again to see my kids for 2 weeks. I do not feel that bad actually, just frustrated about what could have been and the way it ended, and specially here nasty way of refusing to even talk about it, even if I have not at all flooded her with calls, mails, etc. I hope maybe some day to be able to understand what happened. I Thanks for being here friends, this board has helped me a lot.
  • Sep 16, 2009, 01:02 AM
    amicon
    I think you re going to have to come to terms with the fact that you ll probably never get answers to your questions.In the long run it doesn't really matter what the answers might or might not be.We can only come up with our own answers to our own questions and try to learn from our o mistakes and hopefully have better relationships in the future.
  • Sep 16, 2009, 08:04 AM
    talaniman

    Her being so close will make no contact harder, as those old feelings will be stirred up again every time you see her house, or car, or a glimpse of her, but its about you being able to give yourself time, and a lot of it.

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