What's your plan?? That's what you need to do. So what's your plan?
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What's your plan?? That's what you need to do. So what's your plan?
For now get a summer job, get fit by going to the gym and go out more with my friends when I get home, I would like to meet new people, spend more time with my family and that's pretty much it I guess... seems pretty boring and routine... I'm going to keep NCing my ex and I don't even want to think about her anymore but sometmes I can't help it. Maybe find someone else afterwards when I'm done all of this I guess. Than finish school, and get a permanent job after that I don't know. Sounds like a boring lifeQuote:
Originally Posted by talaniman
Not very specific. What I was more interested in was the daily things you do for yourself besides the gym.
Young people seem to like to hang in crowds, but what you do without the crowd, may be a good idea to help speed the healing process, and give you some options as to new, and different people, places, and things to get involved in.
Are they're any community service organizations, that maybe deliver to older people, or clean lots, or something a strong young fellow might volunteer for?
I mean what good is a great bod, without the sound mind, and giving heart? Volunteering is truly an eye opener, and a great way to build character, meet good people, and be useful, and productive.
You aren't boring, you just don't know what to do with yourself. You had no problem giving some female your time, so give your time to someone that truly needs it.
Yah right now my daily routine is just school and during the summer I'm going to find a job. I guess I can try to volunteer in something to help the community out. Pretty much right now the whole time, I'm trying to focus on school and all with the exams coming up but I find it hard to lately with all the drama going on and all.Quote:
Originally Posted by talaniman
My advice, find as much stuff as you can do to keep yourself occupied. You have to WANT and be WILLING to sacrifice yourself to get over this, in my opinion. I have constantly been pushing and pushing myself to the limit just to get better, help others, and build an all around decent life for myself. Am I exhausted a lot, yes, but it beats staying in and crying myself to sleep playing some love songs...
Maybe join some student groups or clubs at school. That will help you meet new people and keep you distracted.
Thx KC and JMW but yah you've guys told me that already so many times lol and thanks for telling me I need a reminder lol.
Anyway guys... I got to admit recently I feel like the darkside keeps pulling me and I keep on feeling to break NC. Haven't yet though but I have urges to. I still want her back but I know for sure it won't happen anymore so why am I still tempted. I feel like I want to know what's going on with her life and it still hurts me to think of her and the other guy.
What can I do? >_< I need HELP!!
You have to remain strong. You can't turn off these feelings over night. You just have to know that you will get over this and allow time to do its work. The best way to get time to pass is by having fun. Now go out and do something fun!
Should I break NC or keep it? I'm afraid if I break NC ill go back to square one and feel more hurt than if I don't break it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by none12345
You will. And it will make you very vulnerable like it all first happened. I was in your shoes and yesterday broke NC. Now I'm back to day 1. grrrrr
My girl moved coast to coast for ME and after a year wanted space aka met another guy. She moved out to move with him after only knowing him a month.
Trust me man, she's not going to come running back and why would u want her to? All your feelings right now.. your reasons for being on here... its all her fault! Find someone better Don't BREAK NC
Yah my ex left me for some other guy too. I don't feel like I can be with her anymore. Oh what happened when you broke nc? How'd it happen?Quote:
Originally Posted by stillfading
I gave into all her texts. If you want to fight for her you have to do so by being strong and silent. If you contact her then she wins her game and knows you're still there waiting like a puppy to cuddle with again when he doesn't work out.
And they won't work out. I feel like crap for breaking NC. I disappointed myself.
She knows you still care. Trust me. You just got to hang in there. You can PM me if you need support, I know I do. Dude we are so much better than these people. They gave up a life of honest and pure love for curiosity and fun.
NC NC NC
I played text message terrorism too lol. Man we really have no choice once we start suspecting things, it's not fair to us. And look... we were BOTH right. Dude I can relate so much thank you for posting this when you did. Let them have each other and "find themselves" and all that BS. Its an excuse to soften the blow because YES they still love us and care. But they lack the commitment necessary to have a love that is worth US caring for. Our girls were cowards and living their lives on lies, can't change their minds or their answers. Just keep going going going NC
Yah. Okay. Our situation is so alike and I think we're going through the same thing. Even if she wants me back I don't think I can take her back anymore. I can try but I don't think it ll work out. We so deserve someone who will appreciate us and love us no matter what and be loyal and not bail on us for some other guy.Quote:
Originally Posted by stillfading
NC all the way. If we break it we would be just more hurt than if we don't? Actually I gave up so much for this girl too. I move away for her to be closer, I spent so much money on her and I'm a college student, I go see her 200 miles away and back and so much man. She gave me up without hesitation... I feel so used up.
Hey!
Don't break NC..! I started nc for 3 weeks, then thought I could have a friendly talk with him so I broke NC... now I have to start all over again! Trust me, you don't want to know what they are doing.. it'll just hurt you more! And why do we want more pain when we are already suffering everyday?
So keep up your NC and don't be like me... I felt so vulnerable after I talked to him... its like he moved on... but I'm still the same.. which makes me so weak... and I would hate for him to see me like this.. especially when he likes another girl... which makes me look even more bad..! So stay strong! NC NC
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GK5qy_X7R8
This is how I keep myself busy :) it made me feel better, hope it does the same for you!
is that you in the video? ^ that lifted my spirits
currently resisting her texts blah no more feeding her ego to boost her eternally lacking self esteem and guilt.
none, do u have email or a messenger? Would like to talk sometime man to help each other! I'm a college student as well
Yup that's me, it made me feel like a thousand times better when I watched it :)
yah I do. I got msn =P what's your email? Message me or something and ill add you!Quote:
Originally Posted by stillfading
Hearbroke your video was awesome. I am a musician (with real fans) and would love to chat with u sometime as well!
Well I'm a starting musician, but I like editing movies and making my own :) shoot me a pvt mssg with your email, and ill hit you back up with mineQuote:
Originally Posted by stillfading
I see the sight with a different light words cannot describe the way I'm feeling because I've been searching in my head for the words I thought she said for too long... I've finally see now that she's gone. I don't know if that makes any sense what I just said lol.
Day 2 has begun. None hold on man! It's time to be happy again! Like before u met her!
I see no option for private messaging on here :(Quote:
Originally Posted by heartbroke
There is Pm. Go to my profile and check the left side. Anyway yah still on NC gets harder each day buddy. You hold on too man. We deserve to be happy with someone that treats us right.Quote:
Originally Posted by stillfading
It gets harder at first, but then it starts getting easier.
Update~
Okay guys its been almost 4 weeks of NC. Sometimes things are starting to look up. Got a new set of wardrobe, haircut, latest novel to read but YET sometimes memories of her still come up and I feel the need to do something or she ll be out of my life for good.
I still believe I want her to be in my life and everything would be perfect YET at the same time I don't feel like I can be with her because she's treated me horribly and I deserve someone better.
Anyway, basically I'm still confused. Any suggestions guys? I feel tempted to break NC. Do you guys believe in the quote:
"If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, their your's forever. If they dont, they were never yours to begin with."
Anyway what do you think I should do guys?
Step away from the computer, put on those new clothes, and show off the haircut. Seen mom lately? The idea is to change what your thinking about with some activity that you enjoy.
Anyway last night I had dinner with my family. Something strange happened. We went out for dinner and when we had our fortune cookies, mine was the only one that had 2 slips inside...
The first one says "Stop searching. Happiness will come to you."
The second one says "Tell those you love that you do."
What do you guys think about this? Its kind of ironic isn't it. Do you think the second one is telling me to tell my ex I love her? O_O weird...
NO!! Tell your family you love them instead!
okies tal =PQuote:
Originally Posted by talaniman
Guys why is the dark side so strong? It keeps pulling me... Im still fighting it. Staying strong. NCing but I don't know how much more I can take >_<. What can I do??
Stay strong.
The fortune cookie is not telling you to make a fool of yourself.
Watch that Gives You Hell video some more...
Tell your mom you love her. (Tell someone who cares, you know?)
Okies survivor. Are you still in NC too?Quote:
Originally Posted by Survivor07
"Stop searching. Happiness will come to you."
What does that really mean? O_O How will you find something if you don't look for it? I don't get it >_<
I did NC. Had weak moments, broke it, kicked myself for it and did it again until I succeeded. I know how hard it is. But, it is the only way.
I think the fortune cookies' message is to just live your life... stop focusing on the past, which you can't change, and stop worrying about the future. Enjoy the now. If that makes sense... it's late.
It's like you can't go searching for love, it will find you, when you least expect it. That is true.
Besides... it's just a fortune cookie for entertainment value. Maybe you should play the lottery tomorrow! Lol
Quit searching for happiness and let it come to you through your actions and the new people who you meet and help along the way. Don't search too hard, because if you don't find what you're looking for, you will just let yourself down. Just take life day by day, right now, and roll with the punches and the rewards.
To Journal:
Its been a long time since I've talked to you. Its been roughly about 4 weeks. I wonder what you are doing and how are you. It hurts me to know that you are with another guy right now. I just tears me completely apart after everything that happened between me and you. We fought for the relationship so hard, we fought to be together even though we were so far away from each other. In the end, we past every arguments, we would always get through it no matter what.
Now, all of a sudden you have this new guy now. You gave up on our relationship for him. Tell me now. How do you really feel? Is it worth it? Do you even miss me at all? I bet you're having the time of your life, while I am here still hung up on you. I tried to get better and I think I am very slowly with the support of my friends and others that have been in the same situation. Why is it so hard to get over you baby? I just can't seem to let go no matter how hard I try.
You don't know how much you meant to me. I though we were going to have our perfect life together with the 4 kids you want, 2 boys and twin girls you always wanted. What happened to that? I thought we were going to get married, honeymoon to Hawaii, work to save up for our trip around the world. I just started crying again. I feel like such a baby and I feel so weak. Why did you thow me away like yesterdays newspaper. I thought I meant more to you than that. Now you're going to do all the things we wanted to with this new guy now?
I've had sleepless nights, unproductive days, nightmares, heartaches because of what happened. I guess this really is the end for us. Im not going to be in your life anymore and if you ask why, then you don't know a thing about me. Do you know how much hurt it will cause me just to be your friend and not your lover after everything we shared? Why do your friends matter so much to you? Why did you always pick them over me? Just because they told you they would be disappointed in you if you choose to be with me, you choose someone they are familiar with?
I was always there for you when this guy wasn't even in the picture. Why did you tell me you were going to be with me for the rest of your life, and then leave me? I try to stay strong for myself, but the thought of you and the could have beens always tear me down. Its too late now for us. If you decide you want to be with me afterwards, I'm sorry but I can't be with you anymore. You've broke my heart, I can't ever trust you anymore, your friends are always going to be in the way and I'm not coming back to you for you to leave me again or under your terms. I want to be happy not sad. I wish things could have turned out differently.
This is goodbye forever. Ill be waiting for my happiness to come find me without you. I still love you and I always will. I hope you find what you are looking for.
Ps. Jeff
(you don't know how hard it is to write this)
I don't know what you want to send as message to her, but I would be cautious cause she might get the wrong message. Think twice before sending this to her.
I think he was just venting a message he would have sent to her.
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