Believe me... I can feel your pain all over... It sucks... I am at 1 month and a half of no contact... I still saw a photo of us kissing by mistake on my phone so I deleted it quick... feeling down now. I hate this feeling of missing her... just hang in there with me.

Emopunk, I had a look at your thread. I know exactly how you feel, I miss her something awful. I just came back from a party, and all I could think of was whether she was at a party tonight, how much I would like to have her with me etc. Life these days is mostly about passing time and trying to keep myself from thinking about her. I know it will get better, for the both of us, but it will take some time.

I've been majorly depressed lately. It's not like before, there's a different kind of pain, not as intense, but worse in a way. I can't help but to think that she may have moved on. I read this on here the other day:

Quote:

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From a female and from my own perspective, usually when a woman leaves a guy it usually means she has moved on.
I think women in general give their all when in a relationship, but will be willing to take it all with her and leave when she feels the need to do so.

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I'm trying not to worry about it, but it's like the polar bear thing. I wish I could go away somewhere, but I have my exams coming up next week.

You are beginning to realise and accept that it is over. That underlying hope of getting back together is getting crushed as time goes by and that's why you feel the pain. The fear that she might have moved on is there because if she has then all this is definitely real and permanent. Don't fall into the trap of trying to analyse what the fact she might have moved on that fast says about your relationship. Believe me I have gone down that path and it won't lead anywhere. The truth is that she is no longer in a relationship and is free to move on as are you.

Just try and focus on your exams. I know its hard but you can do this

Yes, focus on your school work, try hanging out with your other friends for support, and soon or a later your hurt will be gone. You are still young and there are so many fish in the ocean that you can catch.

Busterite, I think you were pretty much spot on with your post, I guess I've been realizing that it is in fact over, and I've been truly desperate because it is. And 2ndTime, thanks, I know, I try to socialize and to keep my mind off things.

Well, just signed up for a climbing class tomorrow. Hopefully that will help me keep my mind off things for a bit.

Keeping busy and learning new skills help. Have a good time.

Well, in a move showing total lack of insight into my own abilities, I just ordered a guitar and a play guide. Hopefully I'll make something more of it than just learning the first 10 seconds of Nothing Else Matters... :p

Sometimes, you can turn a emotional case into a creative outlet. I think you are doing right by channeling your emotion into hobby.

Yeah just keep channeling that emotion in a positive way man, it gets easier trust me. The best motivation for me personally is people either not thinking I'm good enough, or turning me down, etc... nothing else lights a fire under me more. You just have to use it in a positive way, and then eventually you just start doing things because you realize that they make you happy. Hang in there, and just vent here if needed! :)

Well, here comes the venting. Why is it always hardest in the morning? It's like everyday I get up, it hits me again. I still cry pretty much everyday. I've become better at steering my thoughts over to other things, so that might be a sign of improvement, but I still frequently have moments where I miss her so much it hurts. I sometimes feel like calling her just to hear her voice. I know it would mess me up even more, so I'm not actually going to do it. It just sucks that she's got so much stuff going on in her life - and may be over me by now for that matter - while I'm stuck here because everyone's busy with their exams. I don't know, maybe I'm just feeling down because I've been sick and haven't had the chance to exercise.

Sorry to hear you've been sick that can make you feel a bit down,try not to dwell on her moving on but on YOU moving on instead.
Make plans to do something you really enjoy every day-you are getting over this ,it just takes time.

Thanks for the support, both of you, all of you. It really goes a long way.

I know I shouldn't dwell on it, and that's why I try to get my mind over on other things, and keep myself occupied. Maybe I'm being impatient, but I just didn't expect this kind of dip a month and half after the break-up. I think I mentioned it, but I spent a month abroad from her this summer with little contact, and my feelings had subsided quite substantially when I got back, so I was expecting to feel better by now. I'm having trouble letting go as well, but I'll just have to try to load up on happy memories and see where it takes me. Thanks again.

It's understandable that mornings are always the worst. I'm definitely past the grief stage, but I still say it's a 60/40 split between she is not the first thing I think of in the morning, to yes I do still think of her when I wake up. Chalk it up to the sleeping in the same bed 97% of the 13 months we were together I guess. Just keep staying busy and hang out with friends. My break up happened about 6 months ago... and then she waffled for about 2.5 months before finally calling it off that she couldn't be in my life at all... and me going NC. I've only just recently started noticing hot girls checking me out, and flirting with me... so it is definitely a process my man. Just let it all out, by I can tell you from experience IT DOES GET BETTER! Just take it one day at a time! :)

Yesterday, I got wasted for the first time in two months. Although it was too soon and I got a little depressed by the end of the evening, I still had a great time. And for the first time since the break-up, I saw this hot girl that I liked. Signs of improvement I hope.

Anyway, do you guys think it's possible to maintain a friendship with an ex without any undercurrents of other stuff? I'm not ready for it yet, not even by a long shot, but I'm not sure if I want her to disappear from my life completely.

Only after a complete, and thorough healing process, where the goal is acceptance, can you achieve any sort of friendship with the ex. Any efforts to be friends before that is a recipe for disaster.

Of course there is always a risk, your partner, or ex will not be as willing as you to be the kinds of friends you want them to be, for whatever reason.

That's why the acceptance is so important, as it still may not work out the way you want it to.

I sometimes find myself wondering if my ex is missing me, or even thinking about me. It probably sounds stupid, but I occasionally wonder how she's going to remember me. I'm pretty sure she had another boyfriend before me, so I wasn't the first, and she's so young. I'm worried I'll just be that guy she dated for a while in high school, a good memory of her teen days perhaps, but nothing more.

I'm afraid that's probably another one of those questions that you might never get the answer to.
Try not to overthink this,once you're over the breakup,she'll be a memory as well.

It hurts to think about, so I know I shouldn't and I try not to, but sometimes I have to face those feelings just to get rid of that nagging pain.