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-   -   He loves me one day and not the next ? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=328744)

  • Mar 16, 2009, 05:51 AM
    imaloneandscare

    Well I've cleaned my house, took the dog out, pegged washing out etc. Why should it be me that has to keep busy and feel lke shat all the time when h's the one that lies, cheats and plays me for a complete fool

    He is probably at that woman's house right now cosying up to her ggggggrrrrrrrrrrrr
  • Mar 16, 2009, 06:27 AM
    imaloneandscare

    I'm having a moment of weakness and was going to text my ex and ask why he isn't interested when I said I was worried that I may have cancer but decided to rant on here instead as I've been told to do in earlier posts!!

    It hurts that he don't care that I could be seriously ill, how could anyone be that cruel??
  • Mar 16, 2009, 07:21 AM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by imaloneandscare View Post
    im having a moment of weakness and was going to text my ex and ask why he isnt interested when i said i was worried that i may have cancer but decided to rant on here instead as ive been told to do in earlier posts !!!!!

    It hurts that he dont care that i could be seriously ill, how could anyone be that cruel ???



    My husband was in and out of the hospital, often in critical condition, for over 5 years. I saw family after family, friend after friend, walk away from other patients because the family/friends "couldn't handle it." I saw people who were (literally) dying alone and afraid.

    Now that I'm a widow I find I make people nervous - if "it" happened to me, "it" could happen to them.

    It's a sad fact of life but not everyone is honorable, not everyone has the fortitude to stay when times get tough, not everyone can handle "it."

    I'm sure you're hurt and angry - how can people behave like this? But they do and I saw it with my own eyes.
  • Mar 16, 2009, 08:21 AM
    talaniman

    When do you face the fact he is a jerk, and player, and learn from the experience, instead of expecting him to be there for you, which is why you tell him your fears, and not a doctor. That's not realistic, nor practical.

    Sorry to break your rant, but playing with a snake, and wondering why he bit you, is not realistic
  • Mar 16, 2009, 09:34 AM
    starbuck8
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by imaloneandscare View Post
    im having a moment of weakness and was going to text my ex and ask why he isnt interested when i said i was worried that i may have cancer but decided to rant on here instead as ive been told to do in earlier posts !!!!!

    It hurts that he dont care that i could be seriously ill, how could anyone be that cruel ???

    I'm sorry, but you seem to be having more time on your hands to sit and worry about him, and him being with someone else, instead of going to the Dr. to determine the nature of this lump! Cancer is only speculation on your part, at this point in time. If I found a lump and was so worried about it being cancer, the last thing on my mind would be my loser boyfriend and who he's sleeping with! Why haven't you gone to the Dr. Honestly, to me this sounds like you are crying wolf in order to get his attention! If it turns out to be cancer, then I am truly sorry, but you won't know until you have a diagnosis will you! Why are you still sitting around and dwelling on him, instead of getting yourself in to see your Dr.

    We have sat and listened to your story, and we have given you our advice. You don't seem to want to take it. When given a list of things to do to occupy your time, you came up with a bunch of excuses why you couldn't do almost all of these things. It's time to shat or get off the pot!
  • Mar 16, 2009, 09:39 AM
    imaloneandscare
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    When do you face the fact he is a jerk, and player, and learn from the experience, instead of expecting him to be there for you, which is why you tell him your fears, and not a doctor. Thats not realistic, nor practical.

    Sorry to break your rant, but playing with a snake, and wondering why he bit you, is not realistic

    I'm an idiot I know, when someone says they love you, you think that they mean it. I wouldn't say that to someone unless I meant it. Only last weekend he was telling me that he loved me and missed me so much and that my friends "having a go at him" have ended any chances of us getting back together.

    It makes me mad that he hasn't got the guts to say to me, look I can't be with just one person so its not fair on you for us to be in a relationship. When I found out he was back friends with this girl (his ex as well, he started seeing her when with me) I text him asking him what the hell was going on, why was he getting in touch with her and at the same time asking for us to getback together? Now I'm not sure if it was him or her that instigated the contact on Facebook, but even if it was her then he should have said look I'm trying to get back with my ex so now is not a good time to be friends on here.

    Then there is the woman he is going on holiday with (friend he and she's says, but I'm sure each want more), why was he planning a holiday with her and at the same time (weekend before last) begging me via text/calls) to come back to him, that he loves me and misses me so much, that I'm the other half of him and he isn't met anyone like me ever before.

    I found out that this other ex (who has cerebal palsy and lives approx 200 miles away) was going to come down in April for his 30th birthday but obviousley not now she found out about his lying cheating scumbag ways. When he was begging me to come back last week he asked me to come to his birthday, I asked why and he replied that he wanted "to show me off, as I was the most beautiful person that he ever had the pleasure of meeting"

    God why am I such a walkover for him, I know that you are going to say I am because I let myself?? Well not anymore people. Im taking control and riding off into the sunset. Im starting to eat and I don't want to see his face ever again.

    I won't lie, the thought of him bouncing from woman to woman kills me inside and I don't know how I'm ever going to get over that gut renching feeling, we've been on and off for 2 yrs, I asked him why we always keep bouncing back to each other and he says "love thats why", at times he does the most amazing things for me and is so kind but more times than not he just lies and ignores my texts until it suits him and his lifestyle to reply, and I'm there lying in bed waiting for him to call/text.

    God I'm so down at the moment, some parts of the day I think I'm OK and will get through this, I keep myself busy and at the end of the housework and dog walking etc I look at my watch and realise I've only "killed" 1 hour whch felt like a lifetime

    Sorry again for the ranting, I suppose I'm better ranting on here then texting him eh xxx

    Thanks again for all your help and advice xxxx
  • Mar 16, 2009, 09:48 AM
    imaloneandscare
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by starbuck8 View Post
    I'm sorry, but you seem to be having more time on your hands to sit and worry about him, and him being with someone else, instead of going to the Dr. to determine the nature of this lump! Cancer is only speculation on your part, at this point in time. If I found a lump and was so worried about it being cancer, the last thing on my mind would be my loser boyfriend and who he's sleeping with! Why haven't you gone to the Dr.? Honestly, to me this sounds like you are crying wolf in order to get his attention! If it turns out to be cancer, then I am truly sorry, but you won't know until you have a diagnosis will you!? Why are you still sitting around and dwelling on him, instead of getting yourself in to see your Dr.?

    We have sat and listened to your story, and we have given you our advice. You don't seem to want to take it. When given a list of things to do to occupy your time, you came up with a bunch of excuses why you couldn't do almost all of these things. It's time to shat or get off the pot!

    Maybe I am trying to frighten him into text me and asking me if I'm OK, if I did that last week then I didn't do it intentionally, I really did think that it maybe cancer, I never told him I had it just that I'm scared that I could. Either way, I told him that last Friday and haven't heard from him since so that speaks volumes to me.

    Im going to keep an eye on the lump and if it hasn't gone in a week then I'm off to the doctors, you are right, maybe I used the lump to get some attention from this creep which I regret now. I just hope it isn't cancer tbh.

    As for the list, I was trying to be negative, I've tried most of things on the list and I'm going to take up a hobby as suggested, I'm doing my very best to keep busy and active, my poor dog is walked to the bone and I'm surprised he has any paws left but heaint complaining lol!!
  • Mar 16, 2009, 09:50 AM
    imaloneandscare

    I meant above as for the list I Wasn't trying to be negative!! Sorry damn laptop keys lol xx
  • Mar 17, 2009, 04:05 AM
    imaloneandscare

    Well, I'm on day 4 of NC, I didn't thik I've ever get to this day without contacting him. Im still so very raw and nothing I do seems to make me forget him but I suppose at least I've gained a little self respect back if nothing else??

    It does not help being made redundant, I've got too much time on my hands and I know it, I'm trying to keep busy, last night the dog received another 2 hour walk

    Thanks for listening to my rants folks, its much appreciated xx
  • Mar 17, 2009, 07:17 AM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by imaloneandscare View Post
    well, im on day 4 of NC, i didnt thik ive ever get to this day tbh without contacting him. Im still so very raw and nothing I do seems to make me forget him but I suppose at least ive gained a little self respect back if nothing else ???

    It does not help being made redundant, ive got too much time on my hands and i know it, im trying to keep busy, last night the dog recieved another 2 hour walk

    Thanks for listening to my rants folks, its much appreciated xx



    When I got divorced years ago I walked the LEGS off my dogs - so I know what you mean.

    Hang in there!
  • Mar 17, 2009, 07:50 AM
    talaniman
    Seems your married, and already having this affair. So what's the real truth, and why do you have to change user names for more feedback? Can you explain why you left the info of your marriage out? Was it shame, or just trying to get a loser ex back?

    That leave me with the impression of you being a liar, and a cheater, who got dumped by your booty on the side. Is that an accurate assumption on my part??

    You cheated, he cheats, and your wondering why this is so messy? Being dishonest, and selfish, usually does complicate things.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 08:03 AM
    imaloneandscare
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Seems your married, and already having this affair. So whats the real truth, and why do you have to change user names for more feedback? Can you explain why you left the info of your marriage out? Was it shame, or just trying to get a loser ex back?

    That leave me with the impression of you being a liar, and a cheater, who got dumped by your booty on the side. Is that an accurate assumption on my part???

    You cheated, he cheats, and your wondering why this is so messy? Being dishonest, and selfish, usually does complicate things.

    I'm sorry, I really don't understand what you mean. Ive never opened two accounts and I'm being honest with you. Im not a liar, I've told everyone the truth.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 08:41 AM
    talaniman

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-330301-2.html,

    So you didn't make this post then?
  • Mar 17, 2009, 08:55 AM
    starbuck8
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-330301-2.html,

    So you didn't make this post then?

    Good catch with finding the other thread! I had this feeling from almost the very beginning. There were just too many inconsistancies here, and things just didn't add up at all.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 09:13 AM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by starbuck8 View Post
    Good catch with finding the other thread! I had this feeling from almost the very beginning. There were just too many inconsistancies here, and things just didn't add up at all.



    And what is the joy of taking up people's time and energy, getting them involved in pretend situations, unless you have some really serious mental problems?

    I suspect the OP will next set her hair on fire to get attention!
  • Mar 17, 2009, 09:30 AM
    tickle

    I stayed away from this one mostly because OP just wouldn't give up posting one new situation after another. I had to grit my teeth every time she came on again and someone responded !

    Tick
  • Mar 17, 2009, 09:59 AM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by tickle View Post
    I stayed away from this one mostly because OP just wouldnt give up posting one new situation after another. I had to grit my teeth every time she came on again and someone responded !

    tick



    I certainly wouldn't have responded if someone had given me the heads up but I had no sense of any of this until today.

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