What next indeed?you ve tried two ways of communicating with her and neither got a response.she s moved on is my take on this.sorry.

She answered my mail: Hi, thanks for the info, regards, F

Now that is a short answer! Tomorrow I'll try to call again.

There must be a reason there is trust issues. You must consider your partner when being in a relationship. Trust is everything. Giving up to easy is not good ether relationships take allot of work.

So far attempts to contact have been futile... I feel OK anyway, doing a lot of sports etc.

Just sent her a sms: Hi I am in town these days maybe we can have a drink, would like to meet again

And she silent... I drove past her house, she is in town, but what can I do?

Not a lot the ball s in her court and either she gets in touch or she doesn't.its that simple.

Well, I have my answers! I tried to call her today, she didn't answer, so I called again and then sent her a message, please answer, she then sent me a message: what part of me not wanting to see you or talk to you do you not understand! And don't dare to come here because I will take measures.

?? Well, I needed this to be able to move on. I am flabbergasted really by so much agressiveness. Thanks guys!

There s your answer and now you can get your life back for real.all the best.

Wauw today I am having a really bad day... it is true that contact sets you back...

I can still not grasp why she is so aggressive, guess I shouldn't think about it and get myself back on my feet again, really hard today.

Yes feeling the way you are today is understandable-thats why no contact is the best thing.I don't think dwelling upon how she feels is a good for you-hard as this sounds you should move on now.

Yeah that is why it is bad to contact it is merely a set back and accomplished nothing.
She may have felt she needed the aggressiveness to be assertive to make sure you got the message without question.

Hi friends, have had a bad weekend but I feel I am getting better. Maybe it wasn't that bad to try the contact, at least I have a clear answer.

I still can't understand her need to be so incredibly rude. I know I am delusional probably, but to be that rude means she must be hurt? It is not like I have been bombarding her with messages or something like that.

Yes you have an answer-and whether she s hurt is no longer important.time to move on now.look after you and heal.

I don't think she is hurt, or was rude.

I thought you could handle rejection because you had nothing to lose?

Haha yes Tal, I thought I could handle it. I think I can but I felt the blow!

And I do think it is not necessary to be rude and threatening. Anyway, I have difficulty with this, have to get it out of my mind.

That's what happens when you push and don't take the hints a female gives to be nice, and let you down easy. You kept pushing and she got harsh, no biggie. Now you know.

Well, I am very likely to bump into her sooner or later, what then? All my other exes I always talk to?

Should you bump into her say hello and walk away.thats all it takes.

Just venting a little bit. I am still waking up with her in my mind, several times a night. It is hard to move on without knowing what exactly went wrong. I am sitting here 300 metres from her house, I must admit I have drove by, even have seen her sitting in her balcony, alone, the weekend. In a couple of days I will leave again to see my kids for 2 weeks. I do not feel that bad actually, just frustrated about what could have been and the way it ended, and specially here nasty way of refusing to even talk about it, even if I have not at all flooded her with calls, mails, etc. I hope maybe some day to be able to understand what happened. I Thanks for being here friends, this board has helped me a lot.

I think you re going to have to come to terms with the fact that you ll probably never get answers to your questions.In the long run it doesn't really matter what the answers might or might not be.We can only come up with our own answers to our own questions and try to learn from our o mistakes and hopefully have better relationships in the future.

Her being so close will make no contact harder, as those old feelings will be stirred up again every time you see her house, or car, or a glimpse of her, but its about you being able to give yourself time, and a lot of it.

Yep, will be going away for 2 weeks again this weekend, that might help. I guess her refusal to even talk to me must mean she has another. Knowing for sure would make it easier.

Whether she is with somebody else is speculation and irrelevant.What you know for a fact is that she doesn't want any contact.So you have to take it from there,and start building yourself up again.

But its not your business what she does. Why do you need her having other interests, to make your moving on easier? That's something that's YOUR decision, no matter what she is doing.

I think it is because, during our previous break which lasted 2 months, she was even more clear in not wanting anything to do with me, but came back... My mind is against my (and yours!) better judgement playing that game with me still, that she'll be back and we'll make it the third time around... that's why I almost hope she is with somebody else... does that make sense?

Ok friends, I got my distraction... my ex wife is trying to change the schedule of our kids, in stead of 2 weeks on, 2 weeks off, changing every week. That would mean for me to drive 2000 km a month in stead of 1000... Anyway, keeps my mind off the ex girlfriend to be busy with this new issue. Feeling a lot better.

Hey good you re feeling better only way to go-thats a lot of driving ; keep the music going!

You are in emotional roller coaster between child custody and break up in a foreign country. You will need strong nerve. As you know, you will be getting better as time goes by. I always stick with the old cliché, everything happens for purpose, and everything has cost. You will get paid well since you have tried hard. Take care yourself!

When I was a little girl, I thought grown ups do not have issues just like they do not have to do their homework. Ha ha. What an innocent misunderstanding. Being a cool grown up is not that easy. That's why our life is interesting. Oh, well.

Friends, I am doing OK, much much better then when I first came here. Still thinking a lot of her though, also waking up at night with her in my head etc.

Knowing my story, do you guys think I ever hear from her again? Even just to check up? Just wondering what you think.

NO! Because if your both doing your own things you'll be to busy living, except for the occasional thoughts.

Maybe you end up as friends for life, maybe you won't. Maybe you fall for the next hot potato you meet, or she does. You never know so be in a place where you can deal with whatever happens in an adult, clear headed way.

I think you ve got a touch of what I d call relationship hangover-nobody knows what may happen in the future-which is probably a blessing in disguise?

I am having a very nostalgic day today, it still feels so weird that the last time we saw each other, June 8th!! We were totally all over each other and then never spoke again... pfffff... c'est la vie...

Nostalgia s OK but don't get stuck there.que sera sera -and life still goes on.

It is a rainy day here, that is not very often the case... how are you doing! See that you are very active on the board!

I'm good thanks. It's a great board and it s helped me get back on my feet very quickly. Trying to help others a great way to regain your selfrespect! :-) how are your kids?

Kids are great, running around with friends. I am quite good also, lots of mountainbiking and gym, lost 5 kilos, am strong, look like an adolescent myself! But... as you know, I have that nagging issue in the back (and front) of my head!

Yup I get that but what can you do? Me being an impatient person I just let it go when I ve tried my best.
And I believe you did try but it wasn't happening and that's sad but there you are.
Sometimes we have to chalk things up to good/bad memories and move on Harrie. :-( x

Friends, I still have her in my head, can't help looking indirectly at her Facebook (I look at a page of a girlfriend of hers where she occasionaly writes on) I know that is bad but... I'd like sooooo much to be able to talk to her but we know what happened when I tried... sigh... it just does not feel "over" yet for me! I'll keep up the no contact... but I do feel that as time goes by she flies away...

Stop stalking her on Facebook! That's not No Contact, its unnecessary torture.

Every time you check out FB you take a mega step in the wrong direction.
You know the drill find the strength to stick to it.

Thanks, I know I shouldn't, I feel fine though, funcioning normal again, so it is not that I am an emotional wreck anymore, just curious about her, thinking about her yes. I'll try to get a grip on that, I think it will fade in time, it is already happening.