Yes bella-some days suck!tomorrow s another day though and I think you ve been doing really well!

If they are getting married in a church, there is no reason for you not to attend the church ceremony.

It is not closed to the public when a marriage is taking place, unless things have recently changed.

You can go and watch them get married, which is the important part, without an invite.

Wow bella thank you so much for all of this! I'm 3 days out of a 2year relatioship and I feel empowered by your post! I went through the same motions as you - feeling sick, couldn't eat, crying all the time, bargining with myself if I had done things differently we'd still be together, checking his Facebook all the time, checking my phone for texts all the time, always thinking of him, sometimes talking about him as though he was still my boyfriend, understanding why we broke up and that it wasn't a healthy reltonship, working out how much of a loser he was to me for the last 2 months of the reltionship, he also 'couldn't sleep' with me in the bed and was a selfish loser for the last 6 months - except my ex was really immature I was his first relationship and he didn't know how to treat women. Understanding that I deserve better! Keeping NC for 3 weeks - until exams are over then we might talk, realising who my true friends are, as I had a lot of mutual friends with him. I'm now looking in better shape then ever and have the whole summer ahead of me to really get those heads turning, I am going to be strong and gorgeous when I next see him. I feel like a massive weight is off my shoulders and even though I think about him still and get sad about "not waking up in his arms" and all those lame romantic things, I know there is an absolute sweetheart out there somewhere, waiting for me, who is going to cherish me with all of their heart! And there is someone out there for you too bella, I just know it!
And thank-you so much again for all your fantastic posts and everyone else's support! It has helped me more than you would ever believe and I know it would help others too! U must be doing so well by now! All the best!

Hey Jenny,

I'm SOO glad that my posts helped you! I am doing a lot better now. After he was a jack a$$ in August it made it so easy for me to justnot want to talk to him anymore. He just wasn't the guy Iknew anymore. Then he started dating someone knew and it hurt but helped me a lot to just move on. I was hanging out with another guy this passed month - but he was kind of flaky and had his own break up problems to deal with.

I actually ran into my ex last night for the first time since my last post. One of my friends warned me he would be out with his girlfriend wher we were going but I said I'd go anyway. Said hi to him he gave me a hug asked how I was doing - chatted for a bit then I went on my way. Saw him later in the night too - it was all civil. Feelings come rushing back but not nearly as bad (and his girlfriend stood him up which kind of made me happy hahahahahha).

So today I kind of missed him - NOTHING like before - but I know there are plenty of better men out there! Best thing to do is get in shape - go to the gym and be healthy and good looking for all those other guys - be happy with who you are before dating someone else so you know you are being treated right.

If you ever need any help - def send me a message! GOOD LUCK!

Good that you got that one over with, Bella.

Rock on... No missing, yes.

Get reaquainted with yourself & what is important when it comes to guys & what you want.

Ya know what's helped for me is to live in the moment. Not too far in the past or future. Break down those feelings when they enter. Am I digging this moment? Why not? "Oh yeah"

Good luck.

Van

Probably cause of BS...



Van

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bella99

Best thing to do is get in shape - go to the gym and be healthy and good looking for all those other guys -

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Glad your doing so well Bella , and what you said above is so true.


Time may heal all wounds but a steady daily routine makes a really good bandage.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bella99

but I know there are plenty of better men out there! Best thing to do is get in shape - go to the gym and be healthy and good looking for all those other guys - be happy with who you are before dating someone else so you know you are being treated right.

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Yea! There is still good men out there like me! Wait... no, I'm not available, I'm planning to stay single... sorry girls :( .

So this is totally random -but my ex JUST sent me a text - he is apparently golfing with my boss today. How random is that? (they aren't close friends or anything) I think he just was still on the mailing list for the golf tourny from when we were going out - and now he is on my boss's foursome.

Talk about random!

Don't fall into the trap!! I did and it was NOT fun!

I'm not golfing with him - and I have no hopes of hanging out with him either - he is already dating someone else. I just thought it was random he decided to go golf with my boss.

Yup-strange but that's life. Good to know you're OK again.

Who cares, let him.

I hate those days where you just randomly feel kind of lonely. I'm sure everyone has them - that's my day today. No real good reason for it, and I know better by now, but just can't get rid of the feeling.

I know there are lots of great guys out there that I have yet to meet, and believe me, I'm not in any rush. Just today is kind blah. The fact that today is Monday probably isn't helping.

Be strong. It happens to the best of us. It's more than normal. I usually go to the gym during these days and then I feel better, or I call all my friends and see which one is available for a walk in town.

Another point, you shouldn't look for someone because you are lonely. You need to be able to feel great alone before you date.

You I'm not looking for anyone currently - someone comes along they do. It's just one of those mondays where I don't feel like doing anything productive, and blah.

I have work all day and class all night, so can't do anything fun today :( I think that is contributing to the way I feel. So much to do in the next few weeks (I have work, 2 grad classes and I'm moving), just not enough time for fun. Today would be a great day for a hike.

I know what you mean lol, I have time where I'm down also when I have too much work. I try to go to the gym though at least for 1 hour, so that I feel better in myself.

Here's a hint: plan a trip but in the far future, you'll see your day will go much better.

I hope everyone has a great holiday! Thanks for all of your help this year!

I'm doing pretty well right now - tiny ups and downs but nothing like a few months ago, so thank you all for your help.

Good news Bella!
Happy Holidays to you !

Glad to hear it.
Cheers, Bella.
Same to you.

Just in time to enjoy the holifay season.

The holidays are always a bit more tough but I think being single for the holidays is more fun - more holiday parties! Hahhaha. Have a great one!

More holiday parties and more money to spend on other things. Plus, there is less to stress out about, because you don't have to shop for the "perfect" gift.

Bring on the eggnog.

So, I have the choice of going to a new years eve party with all of my friends, but my exbf and his new girlfriend will be there. I'm still on the fence about it. But last night I actually went out to dinner with them (and some other friends). His girlfriend, Kate, and I had never really been introduced so I took it upon myself to introduce myself and strike up conversation. Wanted to see if I could stomach hanging out with them for NYE. She was really nice to me, and he was pretty nice to me as well. He treated me like old times when he wasn't a jerk. Sucks that she's so nice (if you know what I mean). But at least they didn't try to make me feel weird, so maybe down the line we can all be friends. We have so many friends in common, that if they stay together we need to be friends or it will just always be awkward.

Still don't know about the party though. I'll know every person there - and I kind of want to go do something where I won't know everyone. So I might go up to Brooklyn. Kind of feel like starting the New Year out fresh with different people. My old roommate lives up there so might go.

So it was nice that everythign was OK between each of us, but you know there is still that faint pang of jealousy.

Happy New Year everyone - time for a fresh start.

Happy New Year my dear!
And I'd go for the Brooklyn option-meet new people.
All the best.x

Your state is really small. Go to Brooklyn, meet new people it's usually much fun also.

So just thought I'd provide an update on my situation. As of last night, I have been single for a year now. Honestly, I've been in a great mood recently. Last night for a little bit I did feel a little upset over how terrible last year was, and how I wish I would have handled it differently. I was mad at my ex last for ruining a good portion of my year.

He actually texted me last week for the first time in a year to see if I wanted to go out - I just responded - I won't be home. I think we could probably be friends in the coming months but I really just would like to continue to do my own thing and leave him alone.

Lots of guys are floating around for dates this past month or two, so it's nice to have things normal, fun, and flirty. I'm looking forward to having a great summer with no drama, and no emotions similar to last year :)

Took me a long time to get over that guy, haven't talked to him or seen him since mid-december, and I really feel great. Everything happens for a reason. Learned a lot about myself this year.

Good for you.

Same here, going on a year for me.

That's nice! I almost got into a year being single, I guess you guys beat me :(.

Unfortunately - my mom passed away last week - I posted it under bereavement but some of you guys on this thread have been so helpful with break ups - figured id let you know. If u have ever experienced losing a parent - take a look at my thread there, and let me know what you think. This is so rough - pretty different from how I felt when my ex and I broke up though - I was more immediately sad then - right now I guess it hasn't hit me how this will impact me for the rest of my life just yet. :-(

Im sorry.
Yeah I know what its like. And a brother that died too.
Don't think we are ever truly prepared.

My best,
Van