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-   -   We got back togeth.but am I paranoid? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=425236)

  • Oct 18, 2009, 07:23 AM
    benson1
    I see! Cause I was supporting him through txt about going back to uni so he is getting that support from me!
    He needs to miss me and the only way that might happen is if I let him miss me!
  • Oct 18, 2009, 07:27 AM
    redhed35
    Quote:

    I see! Cause I was supporting him through txt about going back to uni so he is getting that support from me!
    He needs to miss me and the only way that might happen is if I let him miss me!
    Eureka!

    However he may not miss you at all... keep that in mind.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 07:30 AM
    sully123

    Exactly, every time you are available, he knows that. He thinks in his mind, I don't have to worry, she is always there for me. Also, he can have this relationship anyway he wants it. You have to be strong! Believe me, I know it's hard. Don't you think he is going to start wondering oh, why hasn't she text me back, or why haven't I heard from her? All these things will starting running through his mind. That's if he really cares about you.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 07:33 AM
    benson1

    Yeah all of you ar right and I have to remember he might not miss me at all.
    Then I might stop missing him!
    Do u think its too late to claim back that power? Ie by me texting yesterday has that all went down the drain?
  • Oct 18, 2009, 07:38 AM
    talaniman

    Start today to do the right thing for yourself. Nothing wrong with starting over from the here and now.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 08:07 AM
    benson1

    Will he see that?
  • Oct 18, 2009, 08:16 AM
    redhed35
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by benson1 View Post
    Will he see that?

    You need to stop wondering what he will see,and if he even cares.

    Your doing this for you!

    No contact is not about the other person,its about you healing and moving on... he will become a distant memory, and you will be happy.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 08:22 AM
    Jayjay027

    You just have to concentrate on you, and by keeping contact with him, you aren't doing that.

    By not replying to his texts or contacting him, he will more than likely contact you again, but you need to focus on you, and focus on what you want. The time spent not contacting him should be put into making you feel better.

    I've joined two exercise classes and bought myself a LOT of new clothes, shoes etc... basically just spoiling myself. Do anything that you enjoy that doesn't involve him.
    If he wants you back, trust me, you'll know because he'll let you know. So far, he has offered you nothing but confusion and heartache.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 11:26 AM
    benson1

    Is it just me or is it only at night you start to feel really low.
    I went to the gym to keep busy
    But sitting at this time is a killer and when I really start to miss him. Must not contact!
  • Oct 18, 2009, 11:35 AM
    Jayjay027

    No your right. Night is worse.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 11:37 AM
    amicon
    Can you phone a friend?Its tough just sitting on your own.
    Must not contact is the right attitude though.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 11:57 AM
    benson1

    Yeah I do but I don't feel like talking to anyone.
    I just keep thinking about him. Again its because I know he is out because I was
    Meant to go with him! But I need to remember the guilt and self loathing I feel when I do contact him!
    Just feel he has all the power as he was the one txt then reminded me we are meant to have no contact.
    So I feel he has all the power
  • Oct 18, 2009, 12:16 PM
    amicon
    You have the power to stay away from contacting him.
    You may not feel this right now but you re being strong.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 12:23 PM
    benson1

    Yeah! Thank god for you guys!its helped so much! Ill be running everything by you all before I make any sort of move!
  • Oct 18, 2009, 12:36 PM
    amicon

    You re so welcome.
    Take care now.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 12:59 PM
    benson1

    Sorry I know I keep going on and on and on
    But when he started texting me about starting uni
    Then ended the conversation with 'remember no contact"
    It felt like a bit of a slap in the face cause I was offering support and he txt me.
    Does this show that he does not really care about me?
  • Oct 18, 2009, 01:14 PM
    Jayjay027

    Yes!

    He wanted your support and advice to benefit him - but if you want support and advice - "remember no contact"

    Blah to him. You deserve better.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 01:19 PM
    benson1

    It sucks! God I wish I just ignored him! Blah indeed! You heard from your ex?
  • Oct 18, 2009, 01:30 PM
    Jayjay027

    Yes actually. He was telling me today how his engine in his car has messed up and its going to cost a fortune to fix. I replied with "my heart bleeds" then he started saying how our relationship broke down because of the fights.

    FYI - the fights we had were in 2 stressful weeks leading up to the breakup, they were about uncooked chicken, the oven temperature, the fish being fed once or twice a day. Stupid things. Nothing worth breaking up over.
  • Oct 18, 2009, 01:34 PM
    benson1

    So is his reason for the break up because of fighting?

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