Ask Me Help Desk - The Joys of Being Single.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

Boy the joys of being single is really turning into a battle of the sexes.

I don't think it really has anything to do with gender. I'm sure gay and lesbian couples that live together have all the same issues. It's the neat freaks versus the slobs.

Quote:

Originally Posted by redhed35

1.i dont have to sleep on the wet patch!

That too me way too long to get...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Romefalls19

The hair products kill me! I like things put away neatly. So maybe the woman on here can explain a few things to me.

1. When you take off your shoes, why is it so hard to put them back into the closet? They have friends there, they like it there, I promise.

2. How many different hair products are needed? I mean, hair spray, hair gel, hair gel for curls, hair gel for frizz, hair gel for the Monday of the third month and 4 week of the year! Come ON!

3. How many different types of make up need to be applied daily? I sometimes wonder if my fiance actually has a face.

4. Why is it that guys can shower, get dressed, watch a TV show and be ready to go, before your hair is even done?

Did you not read how men and women shower? :p

My shoes actually stay wherever I take them off, but I can do that because I live alone now, and trust me it's going to stay that way. :D

Now, this next one made me laugh. What is the average length of most mens hair?. and a girls? My hair is down to the middle of my back. It takes 10 minutes just to wash it and put conditioner in. If I didn't do that, you wouldn't want to see the amount of hair that would be in that drain. Also, I don't want a migrane by the time I've combed it out if it isn't conditioned. Then a lot of us have to put in a color protector, or we would be spending more money going to get it colored or get highlights more often. Then there is the facial scrub so we can get whatever makeup was on before, off. Then we're at shaving the legs. That takes 5 minutes at the least, unless we want our legs bleeding all over the floor! Now we can finally use the soap or shower gel.

Then out of the shower and try and comb through all of that hair. Then all of those products you guys talk about. If we didn't use these, it would take us even longer to get ready. It makes it easier to style, and keeps it from hanging in our faces, or flying all over the place and all over you guys. Then we have to put on lotion, and a face moisturizer so we don't have bags under our eyes, or lines on our face earlier than necessary. Then it's time to to your face! Some foundation with SPF, maybe some eyeliner or a bit of eyeshadow, mascara, a little bronzer, lip stick, lip gloss.

Okay, now it's time to dry and style our hair. Now depending on where you want to take us, this can take a short time or a very long time. Also, it depends on the type of hair we have. Me, well my hair is bone straight and fine. If I want it to do anything at all with it, I need volumizer, and some gel or mousse. Then some scrunching spray if I just want to scrunch it dry. That is the most quick way. It's a whole different story if I want it straight, or curly that day. Then maybe we can get dressed! This again will depend on where you are taking us!

Tired yet? Us too! :p

But you guys would not want it any other way just to get out of the door faster ALL of the time. Trust me, you wouldn't. You guys should thank us for making you wait! We do it for you you know! :D

Ps: There are a bunch of things I left out too!

This post has definitely brightened my spirit.

MRS.S

Quote:

Originally Posted by kctiger

Bathroom clutter is right! I don't know how many freaking hair utensils it takes to make your hair look good...hair dryer, curling iron, hair straightener...am I missing anything (and of course they must all be plugged in and going at the same time)?? The 80 different lotions, hair chemical bottles and such everywhere...AHHHH

Well KC, We do have fab technology these days you know eg:

you can get your hair relaxed or curlyed up at the salon= no hair products, no hair utensils, just ONE hairdryer- a quick blast of 5 minutes and its all done lol.

Has anyone ever seen any of the movie stars or singers without hair and makeup? Eeeekkkk! There are so many of them that you wouldn't even recognise!

(Hi Zee :))

That's me.

Kristin Kreuk without make-up.

Sorry ladies... some guys are just so good looking naturally that make up would flat out be an insult...

Of course, there are certain women that have that ability as well ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by starbuck8

Has anyone ever seen any of the movie stars or singers without hair and makeup? Eeeekkkk!! There are so many of them that you wouldn't even recognise!

I think that's great for the people that try so hard to be like them [and to remind us that celebrities are people too].

I don't remember who said this but she said something amongst the lines of "I looked on the cover of a magazine and I said to myself 'I wish I looked like her'- and it was me."

MRS.S

I would add that I can sleep as wild as I want and don't have to worry about hearing complaints about my snoring.

I forgot to add that I would be able to watch Lifetime all I want on the big TV even when a game is on.

Quote:

Originally Posted by liz28

I would add that I can sleep as wild as I want and don't have to worry about hearing complaints about my snoring.

Aww you snore? I drool when I'm really tired.

MRS.S

Quote:

Originally Posted by mudweiser

Aww you snore? I drool when I'm really tired.

MRS.S

Yeah and when I am really tired, forget about it.

I have to say that it's nice to sleep in a bed without crusty 20 layer thick, feeling like sandpaper feet, rubbing up and down my smooth calves. UGH.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

I have to say that it's nice to sleep in a bed without crusty 20 layer thick, feeling like sandpaper feet, rubbing up and down my smooth calves. UGH.

Haha- what about the farting? I believe no one posted anything about the farting yet..

MRS.S

::hides head::

I am worse than my partner.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mudweiser

haha- what about the farting? I believe no one posted anything about the farting yet..

MRS.S

Or the burping. You can let it all out.

You gals sure do know how to turn a guy on...

Quote:

Originally Posted by kctiger

You gals sure do know how to turn a guy on...

:o:o:o:o

I may have cured my addiction in one post.

I will never be able to show my screen name in public again.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kctiger

You gals sure do know how to turn a guy on...

I thought guys like it when a girl was comfortable... :p

MRS.S

I have a friend,she's a good roundy type of a woman,brown hair blues eyes pale skin.. I think she is attractive, and yet when she's goes out for a night on the tiles,its fake tan (dark oak kind of a colour) brown contact lenses,hair extenstions,push up bra,tummy tuck jeans,fake nails,5 inch heels and a whole lot of attitude..

I asked her why? Who are you doing this for?

If her answer was because it made her feel good,well,fair enough.. but she said men don't like the natural look..

I think she's wrong,natural is good.Not hairy back natural! But,you know what I mean.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

::hides head::

I am worse than my partner.

Sometimes I think my husband is sleeping and then I hear him start giggling. Then we both lay there laughing for a minute.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZoeMarie

sometimes I think my husband is sleeping and then I hear him start giggling. then we both lay there laughing for a minute.

Hey no husband talk allowed this is single life we're talking about [just kidding]:p

Redhead I think you forgot the little chicken inserts that goes in the bra [giggles]
http://lindasmerchandise.com/images/72-7007.jpg

MRS.S

Yeah I know. Sorry... I figured we were so far off track at some points that it was OK.

It's our counterparts that remind us of the joys of when we were single, so they are allowed. :D

Just thought of another good reason for being single.. I don't have to clench my buttocks in bed,hold in my tummy and try and lie in a sexy 'hey baby' pose after eating a heavy meal and a few drinks.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

It's our counterparts that remind us of the joys of when we were single, so they are allowed. :D

I had to spread the rep, but exactly! LMAO

Redhead, I get your point. This girl on my block looks like a clown to me. She goes taning all the time but I think she stays in there too long because her complexion is unreal.

I don't know why but I never been into make-up. The most I wear is lipstick or plain old lip gross. I have tons of lip gross because I buy a bagfull all the time.

I don't like fake nails, can't type nor draw blood from patients, so I don't bother. The only thing I do righteously is get my toes done twice a month--whether or not if I am with someone.

Farting in bed without being judged

Quote:

Originally Posted by redhed35

just thought of another good reason for being single..i dont have to clench my buttocks in bed,hold in my tummy and try and lie in a sexy 'hey baby' pose after eating a heavy meal and a few drinks.

That was fuuny. I guess you don't have to impress them by buying all those sexy undergarments. Before I meant my fiancé I wore strictly boyshorts and mostly sport bras.

Now I wear sexy bras and thongs. The only down side to wearing thongs is that goes deeper in your butt when you fart-this is most uncomfortable feeling, especially if your out somewhere.

If things work out with the lovely brendan the thongs will be whipped out big time!

Ah man,what if I end up on the relationship crisis thread.. (im not even going to think about that.. positive positive positive) and please god one day ill be holding in the farts.

Quote:

Originally Posted by redhed35

if things work out with the lovely brendan the thongs will be whipped out big time!

ah man,what if i end up on the relationship crisis thread..(im not even going to think about that..positive positive positive) and please god one day ill be holding in the farts.!

Things that make you go huh?

Quote:

Originally Posted by redhed35

if things work out with the lovely brendan the thongs will be whipped out big time!

ah man,what if i end up on the relationship crisis thread..(im not even going to think about that..positive positive positive) and please god one day ill be holding in the farts.!

Um, ah, what? :confused:

Quote:

Originally Posted by redhed35

redhed35 agrees: ok ok! im infatuated with brendan,i somehow have to bring him into a conversation!

With an infatuation like this, you may end up on the relationship thread...

Always good to calm yourself.

Too clingy and infatuated too quickly, can have a man running for the nearest exit.

Also, this is not a "conversation" this is a question and answer site, not a chat room, not a place to just randomly write something that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mudweiser

I think you forgot the little chicken inserts that goes in the bra [giggles]
http://lindasmerchandise.com/images/72-7007.jpg

MRS.S

I can see the look on a guy a face if you take the silicone inserts out, priceless.

Is it bad that I don't notice a difference between the before and after, except the tan on the second picture?

Hmmm. ;)

In the after photo her breast looks a little more fuller and it gives it a lift. But then again the after photo might not be the same set of breasts from before because the after photo do looke more taner than the before photo.The silicone breast is a scam. Shame on them!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Is it bad that I don't notice a difference between the before and after, except the tan on the second picture?

Hmmm. ;)

Oh there's a difference all right Alty... :cool:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Altenweg

Is it bad that I don't notice a difference between the before and after, except the tan on the second picture?

Hmmm. ;)

I wouldn't call it "bad". I'd say it indicates that you probably aren't a man trapped in a woman's body. Which is a good thing, right?

Comments on this post
Altenweg agrees: Leave it to you to notice M.
starbuck8 agrees: I knew you would sniff that out! lol

You 2 have to stop picking on me ;)

starbuck8 agrees: I don't know! Have you ever spoken to her on the phone? Her voice is rather deep! haha! ::hiding::

LMAO... funny starby :) oops did Alty hear that :eek: ::running away::