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-   -   She left me for someone else but I still love her (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=153010)

  • Nov 20, 2007, 11:13 PM
    adam hall
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    Hi, my girlfriend and I had been dating for almost 2 months when she left me for another guy and i still love her and i want her back but it hurts so much to see her go.

    Would anybody be able to give me some sdvice on how to get over the break-up and move on?

    Thanks

    You know what man, you shouldn't anticipate getting her back soon. But be sure in the long run-if you rearly care. It won't be easy! the fact that she left for someone else implies that she found something in that guy that fasinate her that is sadly larking in you. You need to know what it is learn it and master it better than that person. Evidence this chartacter to her indirectly. For know forget your pain and just be friends with her care for her and she will learn how to fall in love with you again. SURELY YOU CAN DO THAT,A HALF WIT CAN
  • Nov 20, 2007, 11:15 PM
    adam hall
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by adam hall
    you know what man, you shouldn't anticipate getting her back soon. But be sure in the long run-if you rearly care. it won't be easy!.the fact that she left for someone else implies that she found something in that guy that fasinate her that is sadly larking in you. You need to know what it is learn it and master it better than that person. evidence this chartacter to her indirectly. For know forget your pain and just be friends with her care for her and she will learn how to fall in love with you again. SURELY YOU CAN DO THAT,A HALF WIT CAN

    Good luck
  • Nov 21, 2007, 05:29 AM
    schwartzyms
    Yea, but I'm done with, I'm putting my feelings aside, and I just have to live my life because with everything that's happened, I'm just not intrested anymore, and yea I still care for her, but I must learn to forget those feelings
  • Nov 21, 2007, 06:32 AM
    schwartzyms
    I'm so porud of myself this morning, I woke up at 7:00 to see that I had a text message from her which she sent at 6:30 and I'm so proud of myself that I haven't answerd :)
  • Nov 21, 2007, 06:40 AM
    jen phoenix
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    Hi, my girlfriend and I had been dating for almost 2 months when she left me for another guy and i still love her and i want her back but it hurts so much to see her go.

    Would anybody be able to give me some sdvice on how to get over the break-up and move on?

    Thanks

    Just leave her.. trust in the saying that if you love a person,let her go.if she comes back to you then you're destined and for each other..
  • Nov 21, 2007, 06:42 AM
    schwartzyms
    Yea, good point. I've let her go already and I have just started NC with her this morning, and I'm proud of myself cause I haven't answered her text message :).. like the urge to answer her just like dissappeared over night
  • Nov 21, 2007, 04:37 PM
    friend4u178
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    yea, good point. I've let her go already and i have just started NC with her this morning, and im proud of myself cause i havent answered her text message :).. like the urge to answer her just like dissappeared over night

    Good for you , and you should be proud. Now don't spoil it by contacting when you get the urge.
  • Nov 21, 2007, 04:41 PM
    schwartzyms
    Oh man did I get the urge like 10 minutes ago, but I'm happy because instead of contacting her I went out to the living room and hung out with my sister... im working really hard at this
  • Nov 22, 2007, 08:29 AM
    schwartzyms
    I have a problem :(... I think I'm starting to like someone else, and the girl I'm starting to like, is very close to my ex
  • Nov 22, 2007, 08:31 AM
    schwartzyms
    But the one I'm starting to like lives like 2-3 miles from me, not over 1000
  • Nov 22, 2007, 08:43 AM
    Miss Sparkle
    I broke up with a long term boyfriend, I cried all the time, if a song came on the radio that reminded me of him id get so upset. But I do believe that everything happens for a reason and I met someone new, maybe it was fate or something that I had to go through the break up to find that special person. I would advise you to fill your day with things to do, if your mind is always occupied then you won't have time to think about this girl xxxx
  • Nov 22, 2007, 09:36 AM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Miss Sparkle
    I broke up with a long term boyfriend, i cried all the time, if a song came on the radio that reminded me of him id get so upset. But i do belive that everything happens for a reason and i met someone new, maybe it was fate or something that i had to go through the break up to find that special person. I would advise u to fill your day with things to do, if your mind is always occupied then you wont have time to think about this girl xxxx

    I don't believe in fate. Im someone who believes in "we, humans, are made to make our fate the way we want. it all depends the way we act". As for you, maybe your boyfriend was the bad one, maybe you were the bad one, or maybe there was no bad side, but your lifes were just apart and they crossed just for a couple of minutes in this 1 hour long life.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 11:50 AM
    schwartzyms
    I have the same problem with some songs...


    The girl I'm starting to like now likes one of my friends, but he doesn't know that she likes him and she has had sex before, "from what ive been told from my ex."

    Any tips on how to get her to notice me?

    I'm not that great with girls that I'm not really close to, me and my ex were very close that's wh yi was able to ask her out, I just don't know how to ask people that aren't that close to me out
  • Nov 22, 2007, 11:50 AM
    schwartzyms
    Oh and, happy thanksgiving everyone!!
  • Nov 22, 2007, 12:21 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    i have the same problem with some songs....


    The girl im starting to like now likes one of my friends, but he doesnt know that she likes him and she has had sex before, "from what ive been told from my ex."

    Any tips on how to get her to notice me?

    I'm not that great with girls that im not really close to, me and my ex were very close thats wh yi was able to ask her out, i just dont know how to ask people that arent that close to me out

    To whom are you crying yet ? Be a man, for god's sake! Again, you go to someone who likes someone else! What the hell are you doing? Wasn't the first hurt just enough??
  • Nov 22, 2007, 12:55 PM
    schwartzyms
    I don't know if I like her yet that's the thing, she's a really nice and helpful personm

    Yea I guess it is a stupid thing for me to do, and yea I really don't want to go through the first hurt again

    I think my ex finally got the picture that I'm doing "NC" she texted me a lot yesterday but today I haven't gotten one which I'm sort of happy about and sort of sad about
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:11 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    i dont know if i like her yet thats the thing, shes a really nice and helpful personm

    yea i guess it is a stupid thing for me to do, and yea i really dont want to go through the first hurt again

    i think my ex finally got the picture that im doing "NC" she texted me alot yesterday but today i havent gotten one which im sort of happy about and sort of sad about

    Do you hate this ex of yours? Or you still like her to the point to consider her to be with you again?? Why are you going NC? You may think she calls you, because as someone here said "she cares about you, but as a friend". COMMON!

    Read this, and look at my posts about this topic "NC, friends or Friendly". There are a lot of things to be debatet, but as I still don't see any debate, I still believe it's the best way to act with an ex. Stop being childish, disrespecting her, because she left you. She may had her own reasons for leaving you. And the way you talk to us, that reason was because you were a wuss to her.

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...tml#post728128
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:18 PM
    schwartzyms
    I'm starting to understand here,I don't have feelings for my ex in the way of my wanting to be with her again anymore, I just want to be friends, and I don't hate her, I never did, I don't mean to dissrespect her, and how am I being a wuss?
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:23 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    im starting to understand here,i dont have feelings for my ex in the way of my wanting to be with her again anymore, i just want to be friends, and i dont hate her, i never did, i dont mean to dissrespect her, and how am i being a wuss?

    Don't be offended if I called you wuss. You were, in some point during the relation. We all have been. And we all have been dumped. Is the moment when we don't take care anymore of our masculity, how to act around the woman, how to be the male, keep the attraction, the spark, etc. I was in your shoes. It just doesn't work that way. Lets make a question here. How is it possible, that every guy here, who acted just like me and you, has been dumped from their ex??
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:27 PM
    schwartzyms
    I'm not offended by "wuss" at all, I was just wanted to know...

    Yea, probably like you said in your other post that you told me to read we lost the "spark", or we just became unaware of our needs and just focused on her which I've realized is a very dumb and pathetic thing to do, to stop caring about yourself is just like overdosing on painkillers or something, just without the deathly consequences
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:30 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    i'm not offended by "wuss" at all, i was just wanted to know...

    yea, probably like you said in your other post that you told me to read we lost the "spark", or we just became unaware of our needs and just focused on her which i've realized is a very dumb and pathetic thing to do, to stop caring about yourself is just like overdosing on painkillers or something, just without the deathly consequences

    I can't say anything else. I just say read the whole posts of mine. There are answers of what to do. If they work or not, its another thing. But in the same time, NC won't bring you anything new, nor the friendship. Friendly, makes a difference.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:34 PM
    schwartzyms
    Yea, I have lost the feelings of getting back together with her, now I just want to be friends, but I'm just not sure if I should break the NC yet, it worked for me these past 3-4 days
  • Nov 22, 2007, 01:39 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    yea, i have lost the feelings of getting back together with her, now i just want to be friends, but im just not sure if i should break the NC yet, it worked for me these past 3-4 days

    No you didn't. You just can't lose the feelings for someone during the night, or as you say, during the last 3-4 days. Common, you were the one who came here like crying and asked us how to move on, and get over the breakup. Helloooo. Don't be so superficial. You know how you feel deep down. Anyway, do what you think its best to do, but I say, reconsider the whole thing. She is still there, waiting for a call.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 02:03 PM
    schwartzyms
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Matteus
    but i say, reconsider the whole thing. she is still there, waiting for a call.



    What do you mean by that?
  • Nov 22, 2007, 02:06 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    what do you mean by that?

    You see, it was interesting to you what I mean by that. Read my posts, and than you will understand what I mean with that.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 02:13 PM
    schwartzyms
    Do you mean that she's waiting for a call to see how I feel or something?
  • Nov 22, 2007, 02:16 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    do you mean that she's waiting for a call to see how i feel or something?

    Do you want to learn something about your life and yourself?? Read my posts! And don't be so UNBEARABLE to know what I mean. I won't tell you more, read the posts! And find some truth there.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 02:52 PM
    schwartzyms
    Aww dang it, aright, thanks for the help man
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:14 PM
    friend4u178
    No contact is to heal YOU , not make her want you back. I believe as do many others that if you still want to be with her in a relationship (and don't kid yourself) you can't be friends with her right now. When you have healed and no longer want her as a GF sure then you can be friends. But if you be friends while you still want her you will read all sorts of things into what she says and her actions , this only gives you false hope.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:19 PM
    schwartzyms
    I no longer want her as my girlfriend, I'm done with that, I can't take it anymore so I just let it go and deep down I just don't feel that way anymore, ever since this break up I've taken a different aspect to life and I've noticed that I like different kinds of music, different things its just an amazing feeling and I'm happy because I'm accomplishing all of this without her and I'm no longer mentally attatched, I still don't know if I should end the NC today or end it tomorrow, because I feel healed and I'm not kidding myself
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:21 PM
    friend4u178
    Well it's good that you have healed in 5 days
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:23 PM
    schwartzyms
    I feel so good and it's like I never felt this way before, yea I was happy before the relationship and happy during it but now I just feel happier and you know, I may have conquered this myself but it would have been 10x harder without your guys's advice, id probably still be at square 1
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:23 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by friend4u178
    Well it's good that you have healed in 5 days

    That's what I said to him. It looks more like angry than healing. I don't know, but doesn't sound good. I guess he found someone else, as an emotional flow. I don't know, but in 5 days you can't heal yourself.
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:23 PM
    schwartzyms
    Thank you so much, to everyone who has posted on this question
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:24 PM
    Matteus
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    Thank you so much, to everyone who has posted on this question

    Goodbye!
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:25 PM
    friend4u178
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    Thank you so much, to everyone who has posted on this question

    Pleasure , glad we could help!
  • Nov 22, 2007, 03:25 PM
    schwartzyms
    Goodbye! It was a nice and positive experience talking to all of you...


    And HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!
  • Nov 22, 2007, 07:09 PM
    schwartzyms
    I think I just figured something out, I don't think I ever loved her, I think it was infatuation because there's no way I could have gotten over someone that I love in 5 days
  • Nov 22, 2007, 07:12 PM
    friend4u178
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by schwartzyms
    i think i just figured something out, i don't think i ever loved her, i think it was infatuation because theres no way i could have gotten over someone that i love in 5 days

    I think you may have just nailed it , just took you 5 days longer than us for you to work it out :-) Good luck!
  • Nov 23, 2007, 06:23 AM
    schwartzyms
    This is a hard day, even though I'm over her, it's still hard not to like cry because today was supposed to be our 2nd month

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