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-   -   What should I do to get my boyfriend back? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=88407)

  • May 7, 2007, 06:54 AM
    sypher373
    Samnaomi,

    Something that took me a really long time to realize may help you out. You certainly seem to have a lot of questions. What should I do, what if he does this, what if he does that, how do I react, how will I forgive him if he comes back, what if he's messing around with other girls, etc, etc, etc. I know what its like to have all these questions running through your head.

    In three months, I have finally learned something which helps me to just not care, and calm down. You MUST realize that whatever he is doing, saying, is going to do and say is completely out of your control. Nothing you do will affect how he is going to act. Once I realized this, it is much easier to say to yourself: "Why am I going to worry about what I can't control?". Whatever he is doing, is not your problem anymore. Let it go, work on yourself.

    I know that this probably won't sink in to you, but I'm hoping I can spare you some of the time it took me to finally discover this logic.
  • May 7, 2007, 06:56 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    I will just say this, if I was the boyfriend and every day, day in and day out my girlfirend accused me of cheating because the phone was being used all the time, I would most likely break up also. A lot of trust issues there,and sadly after you burn enough bridges behind you in a relationship you can not always go back, and if you do, it seldoms works and is not normally the same. And you keep calling and calling and calling back every time he hung up.
    Sorry I may vote with the boyfriend on this one, but in any case all of the damage is done now and you need to move on, but also perhaps take this as a lesson on more trust in a relationship. If he had a new girlfriend, he would have beenn seeing her and you would have heard about it .
  • May 7, 2007, 07:04 AM
    joeysgirl
    Fr_chuck that was a little hurtful there but it was the truth so I have to give some kudos...
  • May 7, 2007, 08:55 AM
    samnaomi83
    Gues what I found out he's been cheating on me?
  • May 7, 2007, 09:01 AM
    sypher373
    Pack up, move on, don't ever look back.
  • May 7, 2007, 09:04 AM
    joeysgirl
    Really that sucks yea don't feel bad its to the point with me I'm getting sick and can't stand anyone now... I want to go home I'm so sick to my stomach
  • May 7, 2007, 09:05 AM
    talaniman
    I'll bet no one is surprised, so its over right?
  • May 7, 2007, 09:06 AM
    joeysgirl
    Well duh I'm sure... its over
  • May 7, 2007, 09:59 AM
    joeysgirl
    Really huh...
  • May 7, 2007, 02:58 PM
    momincali
    It would be smart and the best thing for her to do to move on, but Sypher and Talaniman are right, you never know what someone's going to do. Some just remove the knife from their back and put a band aid on it. They make excuses for the person just to be able to stay with them and not be alone.
  • May 7, 2007, 07:34 PM
    samnaomi83
    His excuse for cheating was that every time he broke up with me that's when he went to do his dirty deed. So he doesn't consider it cheating. He's been messing around with two girls plus me. The 17 year old girl he lied to me about he's been messing with her since November. He recently started messing around with a girl from his job. I found all this out on Saturday. He confess everything. He told me that he loves me but I started getting on his nerves. That was his excuse for cheating. Not a good one if you ask me. There's no excuse for that. I will never be with him anymore. I wanted to punch him in the face when he told me this, but I thought about it and I said he's not worth my time. He told me that he doesn't love these girls that he lies to them about loving them just to get what he wants from them. What a loser. I've been with this guy for all this time I can't believe he did this. I didn't even cry about it when he told me. I was just shock that it was out in the open. I will never give my heart out like that no more. He told me that he loves me more then those girls. I told him " you're such an ". One day he'll be old and gray thinking I mess up I had a good thing and lost it. When I get into another relationship I will never let my guard down.
  • May 7, 2007, 10:39 PM
    samnaomi83
    Don't worry what goes around comes around.
  • May 8, 2007, 11:28 AM
    momincali
    When the right man comes along, you'll know it. You won't worry about whether your guard is up or down, you won't need it. You'll know. It will be as plain as the nose on your face. You won't be having to convince yourself that he is respectful, loving and honest, it will be obvious. Be on guard with yourself, yes, but don't put up a wall that no one can break down or your ex won't be the only one growing old alone. Don't punish others for his lack of character.
  • May 10, 2007, 05:26 AM
    samnaomi83
    Can you believe he calls me everyday?
  • May 10, 2007, 05:35 AM
    Jiser
    Block his number! It can be done, phone your provider if you can't do it on your phone.
  • May 10, 2007, 05:57 AM
    tugman_1
    If he wants you back he will come back to you don't make him come to you trust me
  • May 10, 2007, 07:00 PM
    samnaomi83
    He text my phone telling me that he loves me a lot and he miss talking to me on the phone. Also he said that he miss lying next to me in bed.I feel so sorry for him because I can't never be with him no more because I don't trust him. He hurt me so much. I still love him but I am getting over that love. I know there are a lot of guys in this world that wants to be with me and treat me right.
  • May 10, 2007, 07:44 PM
    ladyprincess
    Ight I was in this same situation OK but first of all if he cheated on you why are you sad he's just trying to blame the brake up on you stop calling him and maybe he'll realize he's lost with out you but if you really love him give him his space and don't hate the girl your man was the one who hooked up wit her he could have said no but I know how easy it is to blame everything on da other woman
  • May 20, 2007, 11:45 AM
    samnaomi83
    Can you believe he calls me everyday. The sad part about the whole situation is that I don't pick up. He leaves me a voice message saying that he loves me and the other girls don't mean nothing to him. To bad for him he mess up on a good thing. I love him and I will always love him. But I can move on now knowing the true.
  • Jun 4, 2007, 08:51 AM
    joeysgirl
    Hey talaniman you want to know something I am going through the same thing right know so why don't you just shut the hell up and get off here cause you don't belong here so go screw some one k

    To the girl who posted the page of getting your boyfriend back I'm sorry that I have to do this on your page.

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