Ask Me Help Desk - Saucy dreams

Quote:

Originally Posted by amazing

Dear Krs,

I wonder how she had gotten his personal number and secondly, that she was that confident or bold to write that if she only knows him enough to say hello?. I think people on here are too ready to judge and it sounds like to me, that he must have given her some indication that he might have been available and/or that this was acceptable. That happened to me once with a very attractive man who never wore a marriage ring and gave signals that he was interested in me whether he meant to or not and soon I ended up texting him without knowing that in fact he was even married - it does happen quite frequently between people.

I doubt very much that she would have done this knowingly without having balls of pure steel. I am on your side here, but situations rarely present themselves like this without some means of opportunity and no person texts another without there being something that preseeds the initial meeting between your husband and this girl. What she did was wrong I totally agree but doesn't sound accidental either. Clearly the best thing to do is to do as you did and to ignore it. She can't have anything with your husband if you and him are in a secure relationship and you both love and value each other strongly enough to not feel insecure by this woman's behavior. She has gotten the message and so she should not do it again if she is told by your husband that this is innapropriate and does not want her texting him again. If she continues despite this, then inform the police that she is harassing your marriage and they will deal with the matter further.

I have to disagree. My husband is a good man and doesn't give any signals to any women. He always wears is wedding ring and besides she has his personal mob number because we were or are friends, I have her ex-husbnads mob number too! We have known these people for years!

Quote:

Originally Posted by J_9

If this is the same friend she was having problems with this time last year, there is much more to the story. And understanding that story, the answers, I am sure, will be different than what she is receiving right now.

Thanks J_9... you are quick, as I said yes she is the same girl...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Krs

He always wears is wedding ring and besides she has his personal mob number because we were or are friends, i have her ex-husbnads mob number too!. We have known these people for years!

Just out of curiousity what does mob stand for or mean in the Mediterean? Because in the United States the mob is organized crime and nobody would mess with the wife of a member of the mob. She might lose more than your friendship.

Lofl, in the mediterrean.. mob is short of mobile :)

OHHHHHH!! Okay, you had me wondering for a minute there.

Well so far she hasn't replied!
The last mail from her said :-"Nope – really don't remember.. honestly. Is that why you didn't visit me over xmas?!"

I replied saying, very weird as it came from your mob! And the reason we didn't visit in xmas wasn't due to this text message! (which is true)...

J_9 would understand why we didn't visit her at xmas.

Oh, Krs, what are we going to do with you and this gal "friend"? LOL

She caused you the same grief last year at almost the same time. Am I safe to assume that she wants to come visit you again?

Remember what we talked about last year, in that this is not a true friend if she comes on to your husband?

Folks, this is not the first time this girl has done this to Krs and her hubby, this is actually an ongoing long drawn out thing.

Krs, can I ask why you are still friends with this girl if she refuses to respect your boundaries? It may be time to change your hubbys mobile number and not give it to her.

Oh my! I didn't know there was a history.
Gosh why on earth are you still friends with the b****?

Quote:

Originally Posted by J_9

Oh, Krs, what are we gonna do with you and this gal "friend"? LOL

she caused you the same grief last year at almost the exact same time. Am I safe to assume that she wants to come visit you again?

Remember what we talked about last year, in that this is not a true friend if she comes on to your husband?

Folks, this is not the first time this girl has done this to Krs and her hubby, this is actually an ongoing long drawn out thing.

Krs, can I ask why you are still friends with this girl if she refuses to respect your boundaries? It may be time to change your hubbys mobile number and not give it to her.

Thanks again Janine.

Yes I remember what we spoke about when the issues first arose. I took all into account of what you explained and I thank you for that.

Well as to why I'm still friends, well, its abit tricky. When we were last over to visit our friends, I must admit I didn't try to contact her. My hubby and I are very good mates with her ex hubby and visited him a lot when we were over, the unfortunate thing is her ex and this 'friend' are still friends themselves, so a few times we were over at his (the ex) house, he called her to say we are over and she turned up, then she insisted that she takes us out to dinner, I was going to refuse if it was just me my hubby and her, but a group of mates were joining so we went.

That night the taxi came for us at her ex's house, she was there too. My hubby got in the taxi first - sat at the back, I was still indoors, and she throw away her cigarette immediately and jumped at the back sit near him!! I didn't want to throw a fuss over that as I sat in front of my hubby and he wouldn't let go of my hand!

I just don't get her!

But I haven't heard back from her since my last correspondence with her on fri!
Who knows... maybe this did it!

[QUOTE=J_9]Oh, Krs, what are we gonna do with you and this gal "friend"? LOL

she caused you the same grief last year at almost the exact same time. Am I safe to assume that she wants to come visit you again?

[QUOTE=J_9]

Hahaha, yes she does want to come visit us this yr..! Oh no she isn't!

Did she say she wants to come see you (your husband) this year?

Aha she did, when she took us out for a meal with our mates.

I claimed our place 'may not' be ready in June. She said 'i don't care, I want to see my buddies, ill stay in a hotel'...

But she hasn't replied to my last email last Fri!!

Just don't bother to talk to her again and save yourself and your husband a lot of drama!!

I'd just leave it be, if she has the nerve to bring it up again I'd tell her 'NO'. If she asks why, then be honest with her---her past behavior is inappropriate and in light of it, you do not feel that she is the type of person you choose to welcome into your home or your life.

Yep.. totally, I isn't going to email her and I'm hoping she won't either!

Im confused though why she said she don't remember sending this text because she is a very upfront person... and doesn't hold things back!

Why do you think she has done so? Saying she don't remember?

Why bother yourself with it anymore? Why be confused?

Fact is--the message came from her phone, your husband told you, there is a pattern of behavior in the past that makes you uncomfortable.

Who cares if she remembers or not--YOU know and will remember. End of story.

So true again!

I guess her not replying says enough, don't it?

... so... end of ;)

Quick update guys...

NO emails or messages from HER!!

Guilty as hell if you tell me ;)

Its been 3 weeks now!!
That shows what a 'great' friend she is... all bull*cks!

She denies it, and denies it, then asks is that why I didn't visit our xmas and that was it no more correspondence from her.