Ask Me Help Desk - Put too much pressure on my dream girl now she wants space. *Calling Wildcat*

Quote:

Originally Posted by scotsfilmmaker

mcgmark,

just want to say that I am in the same boat as you mate! My EX- needs `Space` as well. We had a bad breakup around Summer of 2005, but after that I was very supportive of her, emotionally and financially. Things were great most of 2006, but since i got back from Scotland for Christmas, early Jan 2007, things were amazing! She craved me and missed me big time! Since then we have had loads of good times, shopping, affection and generally enjoying one another's company, when back this week, Last Mon 5th Feb, she accused me of hacking her dating website, WHICH I DID NOT! She is on medication for personal reasons, but she said She`d maybe be ok in a few days, she just told me just give me `Space` and we`ll talk later. Now, one of the things she told me leading up to Mon was that she wants to take things slow.

Now, mcgmark I know how it feels, its painful playing the waiting game, but the majority of the guyz and ladies on this forum are correct, it can only get worse if we annoy them. You have to go out with your mates, do somethings that you have always wanted to do, catch a film, etc.

I`ll leave you some advice as its what I`m doing.

1. BE STRONG.

2. DON'T BE NEEDY.

3. DON'T INITIATE AFFECTION, UNLESS SHE ASKES FOR IT.

4. SEE YOUR FRIENDS.

5. BE IN CONTROL.

6. BE MORE CONFIDENT. (WOMEN LOVE THAT!)

mcgmark, You have a friend here that is going through exactly what you are going through, lets hang there, keep us posted,

good luck!

Meh.. I've decided she's got something wrong with her.

She said she wanted space so I gave it to her and then she got mad at me for not talking to her.. even though we were talking every day...

Now all she does is sleep and complain about how cold it is..

And she's not very affectionate but at the same time is needy for it..

She's depressed or something.. either way I can't help her... All I can do is try hard to not let her bring me down and hope she snaps out of it..

They ask for space... disappear!! Disappear!!

Sorry Wildcat21 what do you mean disappear? You mean I take it, just give her what she wants which is space. Perhaps it the language barrier! Lol (London based) I had a bad day today myself, after successfully staying away for 4 days, I bumped into my ex while taking some money out at a cash point. And her ex was with her too! She has told me she is just friends, but its obvious either she has said things that reflect negatively or she was embarrassed and something is happening between them. She ignored me, but then said Hi and her Ex ignored me as well.

Well, I went into the chemist where she went to talk to ask her if she was OK, she was, but her body language was not right, she still said she needed space, which was fine, but she has lied to me about a drink with a friend as it was her ex. But I`m fine about it, its just her rudness which upset me. Well, as my friend said just don't let it bother you. I have a lot of bad thoughts about what may or not be happening... :(

Part of the problem dude is you are not having any empathy for her at all. If love doesn't go two ways it ain't going at all. I really don't think your ready for each other. She wants slow, you want now. Is there a happy medium? If not forget it. If you can't work together, forget it.

I agree with you talaniman,

Though everything worked out as my ex out with ex boyfriend, they are still just friends. She explained everything. I just asked for some answers to some questions, so from that day I gave her space and spent the next 2 days doing stuff for myself. But then she called me and we met for a coffee, picked up some things from my place and spent the rest of the night at hers.

I went home and went out the next day on my own again and guess what? She called me again early evening and a bought her dinner and we talked and spent quality time together. There's so much you don't know which I can't go into, but I do thing things are slightly improving! But you are right more space... I am meeting her for a valentine's drink only, decided not to do the meal as it might seem a bit pushy. Look forward to seeing her in the weekend though, when I cook for her.. :)