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-   -   She wants a break she is confused. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=519747)

  • Nov 9, 2010, 07:29 PM
    mystific

    Quote:

    I agree it's over, but I'm giving it one last shot
    Contradictory. If it's over. It's over. There's no more shots.

    The first thought that came to mind would have been a Harshness Warning x 2. Trying to scale it back just isn't possible.

    So good luck. See you in 30 days.
  • Nov 9, 2010, 07:35 PM
    Normalguy
    WEll I'm positive it's over from what she said. But she said she would give it a shot, but your right IT's over. Its too bad this woman was a keeper. I'm bummed!!
  • Nov 9, 2010, 07:54 PM
    mystific

    Look I feel for you, I truly do. Just from various other posts and other people desperately trying to hold on to someone special it just doesn't work.

    Some people however are a little quicker on the uptake.. others.. take a little more time. I understand this.

    But without doing the 'tough love' route, no matter how hard you try the only person who is going to hurt more in the long run.. well.. is you.

    I loathe being that someone who does the 'i told you so' but you have to look at what information you've given to how we perceive it and then look at the relative information imparted to help you through it.

    30 days is a good chunk of healing time. Renegging on yourself in that time is not going to do you any justice. She's already parted from you mentally and physically. So the only person to whom its going to be the worse off in this scenario is you. For all the effort of NC in this time, the hurt, despair, pain and loneliness you'll go through it will ease.

    Stop being a repeat offender and think of yourself.. for once.
  • Nov 10, 2010, 01:52 AM
    Normalguy
    I know, 30 days from I may not even care, but she was a keep and no I can't force it. I'm just bummed out. : (((
  • Nov 10, 2010, 03:35 AM
    kaka67

    I think she's already told you she's not in love with you!!

    But you just keep stringing this along expecting to get a different outcome then the one you've already got.

    Its not going to happen. She said she doesn't love you!!

    You think a magical 30 days is going to change that? She agreed to that to appease you as you keep ignoring what she's told you and she's sick of hitting her head against a wall.

    She doesn't love you!!

    Let this go.
  • Nov 10, 2010, 05:37 AM
    Normalguy
    I know I am letting it go... It's just hard that's all. She was a keep. I'm a single dad with two kids and it is hard finding a good woman who is attractive and not all crazy and loves your kids
  • Nov 10, 2010, 05:40 AM
    kaka67
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Normalguy View Post
    I know I am letting it go...... It's just hard thats all. She was a keep. I'm a single dad with two kids and it is hard finding a good woman who is attractive and not all crazy and loves your kids

    Yes it is hard. No one can ever say it is easy.

    But trying to continue a relationship with someone who doesn't love you, is more than hard, it is soul destroying.
  • Nov 10, 2010, 06:26 AM
    Normalguy
    Comment on kaka67's post
    I know, but this was the first good relationship after my divorce and I have dated and slept with a bunch of horrible women and I know a keeper when I meeet one.
  • Nov 10, 2010, 01:44 PM
    kaka67

    Ok then seeing she's a keeper?? Keep her.

    Problem solved. Isn't it?

    Just because you want it so bad doesn't mean it will happen.
  • Nov 10, 2010, 03:05 PM
    mystific
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Normalguy View Post
    I know I am letting it go...... It's just hard thats all. She was a keep. I'm a single dad with two kids and it is hard finding a good woman who is attractive and not all crazy and loves your kids

    Yes, because men are just as easy to find for the same situation.

    How about just focusing on your kids instead of your wants. Then perhaps you never know, without trying to channel your energies into finding that 'perfect' package, it'll come along unknowingly.

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