If that's how you see it then there isn't really a point to dating.
Dating can be fun. It can be worth the pain of the breakup because of how much fun you have. Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. You can also learn a lot about yourself and other people by dating.
That's my take on it.

Yea I can agree with you guys but every relationship I've been in its like its so hard to let go of everything and I can't stand that part of it... likes its so hard to say good-bye when you had so much with the person... like me and my girlfriend broke up but now I'm worried she's going to be with someone else or make stupid decisions cause I won't be there

You can't let yourself be responsible for someone else. If she's going to make stupid decisions, then it is something that she will have to learn from. Sometimes you just have to let go when it's time to let go. I know it can be painful, but as Megan said, it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

Threads merged


Helloo everyone!. k so my story goes I'm going to be graduating this year and well my ex girlfriend is younger then me.. and we recently broke up because she said she needs time.. we still like each other and still have feelings for each other just I'm worried were going to drift apart... and were not going to get back togther? We still talk to each other normal though does that make sense.. or should I be giving her the time she needs?she says that the piece will fall together soon and that she can't go the summer without me... I'm willing to wait for this girl she means so much to me.. any suggestions

She wants space, then give it to her. Recollect your own life and find happiness without her, because she's not in your life right now

Us girls can be a confussing species lol, but usually when we say we need time its just usually to have a little time to think about things in our lives, and how we feel all together, speak to her as a friend not only as her partner ask her what she is thinking about and how she is feeling. You could also ask her out straight, where does she want this relationship too go, ask her to picture her future, is it with you?. I wish you all the best in your relationship and future.

Cle, sorry but that line about picture your future only works in The Notebook. When someone asks for time and space, it means they want to think about things without an outside influence, which that is what he is and it's only delaying his recovery.

He needs to stop talking to her, get his life back on track. Check out the NC rules and FAQ it's a great read...

Not a shameless plug either

If he's willing to wait for this girl she must be really special too him, it proves that he has love for her. I agree he should get his life on track, carry on with things. But if he truly loves this girl then he needs to step up and ask what she wants from this relationship in the near future, otherwise what's the point of wasting your time just to be let down? He should approach her as a friend not a partner and just discuss things, such as her life why she called on the break is there anything he can do to help any current situations. If she still has feelings for him but still no longer wants too be with him, he needs to make sure she makes this clear for him that she doesn't want a relationship with him now, or the future. She hasn't been fair with him.

She broke up with him, I don't see what is so unclear about that. You're new around here, so I won't make things too difficult, but read the stories on here. People ask for breaks as a easier way to let the other down, they keep in contact with them to ease their guilt and keep them on the backburner in case their next plan doesn't work out that way.

I loved my ex, but she wanted to go out and be without me. So I let her go, she still called me and sent me texts "I hope this is the right decision" and then even tried telling me who I can and can't hang out with.

He also said she said that the piece will fall together soon. This is why he should sit down with her and discuss this whether there together or not, obviously he needs too know what she means by this. Whether it means she just wants friendship or not, its always best too talk things through. Why just waste love for somebody that took so long to build. He should accept the fact there not together but also she should accept the fact he needs an explanation. I may be new on here but I've had my own experiences with relationships. Im just trying too give a different point of view, if he wishes too know the awnser then basically he should talk too her himself.

It's late here so I won't get into an argument with you. Everyone on this board at one time or another wanted answers, the OP should realize this that sometimes we don't get the answers to questions we want. It sucks, but that's how life is.

It's also not best to talk things through, why keep rehashing broken wounds? Would you go ask someone who lost a family member to describe what they went through when it happened? No, so why ask about the break up again.

If she wants to be with him again, she knows his address and is capable of finding him at anytime. Right now, he needs to leave her alone and cut out the contact so he can get control of his life back

Leave her alone and do your own thing until she figures things out. She will find you when she sorts it all out.

I understand what you are saying, and its late here too but like I said if he wishes for answers the only real person able to give him what he wants is himself and her. It may open broken wounds but he'd know where he stands with this girl. A family member who's been lost is a completely different feeling to a breakup, losing a family member, you know you will never have in your life again its more heart breaking. But this girl is STILL alive and the answers he is seeking can only be told by himself or her. Even though were here to discuss our opinions and thoughts, still he is the one with the question and how he chooses too find an answer is his. Like I said I'm just here to show my opinion and my own advice just like you.

Ahha thanks everyone! The thing is I'm still holding on due to you I do love this girl and I'm trying to make everything work.. but we ever admitted were not happy right now and were happy when were together.. but that's why I'm confused I'm she still likes me and has feelings why arnt we together? I want to give her the time she needs but like when she keeps talking to me I wonder what's going to happen...

I also don't want to be waiting forever by soon I hope she means at least a week or so its already been a week so I don't know how much longer I can stand this

Tell her out straight, you need to know what's going to happen, express your love for her, tell her exactlly how you feel, what this break up is doing to you physically and mentally, she obviously still wishes to talk as she still do. But just stand up and ask her. Otherwise you could be waiting another week maybe 2 just for a simple explanation. Take control.

Just start moving on with your life. She already knows how you feel, so she will find you when she's ready. If she comes back to you, then great! But there's no reason for you to put your life on hold.

Move on doesn't mean go for other woman, but start accepting that you might be single and get on with your life.

She does no how I feel.. we talked today she said she misses me and still likes me she just needs time with herself... and the only reason why she still talks to me is that her feelings don't change... but I don't want to find out later down the road that were not going to get back together and that I've wasted all this time talking to her thinking were going to get back when were not... also like I told her that if we both no this isn't going anywhere then its better off we don't talk so I can let you go... is this right?

I have been merging your posts since March, to keep the confusion down and let people see the whole story.

The simple truth is you've been going through this for quite sometime and your answers haven't changed much even though you have been holding on to false hope because your still in contact with her.

That's the problem, your stuck because she has been feeding you the same song just to keep you confused and unable to move beyond her.

Its not her call, and her story hasn't changed, so its you who must make a decision and stick to it.

Yes you did right now stick to what you and stop letting her toy with you. Move on!