TrueFaith - I have to tell you, that you have some very unattactive qualities, but good for you for trying to work on them.

I am incredibly unhappy with some of your responses, especially to people that you don't even know, but I do and care for very deeply.

With that said, I never want to make anyone feel bad about themselves and I don't mean to be unkind to you.

I have always believed that being ugly inside always comes on the outside and just the opposite, being beautiful inside will always come through on the outside.

I am sorry to say, that if you truly cared for this girl, from your heart, you would see all of her true and natural beauty.

You may truly care for her and if that is the case you have to let go of the part of you that sees only with shallow eyes.

When people are trying to help you, please understand that and don't come out on attack mode.

It is so wrong and cruel to read up on someone's pain and difficulties and then use it against them.

We all have work to do on ourselves and you are no exception.

I would almost bet that if I got to know your girlfriend and met her and if she has a good kind caring heart, I would see nothing but beauty.

Truefaith- You're a clown, honestly. I'm not sure what you wrote can constitute an insult or a logical thought for that matter.

I'm not going to get into a argument over you thinking your taking girls away from people (thats a joke). All I know is that you are a guy who types on this site how good looking he is and how every girl wants him but when confronted to show us all your great looks you fall silent on the subject?? I would think you would want to show us no? Lets settle the debate, you post your pic and I'll see if you can in fact take my girls away :) LOL!

I laugh cause just the thought of you is funny, plus you can't really write, read or spell, yeah I'd better hide those girls from you, they love that... as you know of course;)

I didn't say I was a model Clafairy. Not sure what you mean by that.

Wait I got it. Sorry.sorry. My mistake.

Who was I just saying can't read, write or speak?. lol!

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Originally Posted by BMI

I didn't say i was a model Clafairy. Not sure what you mean by that.

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I was agreeing with you BMI, and the comments were aimed at truefaith.lol Sorry my fault.

Ooh can we start a HOT OR NOT on AMHD?! I'm thrilled!

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ooh can we start a HOT OR NOT on AMHD?! I'm thrilled!

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OMG! Please NO! I already have self esteem issues, and you guys are always so brutally honest, AAAHHHH!! :eek: , LOL

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Originally Posted by TrueFaith

To Kal

Never been turned down. someone sounds a bit to into them selfs is that pride i hear?
oo thats a bad thing. just like. liking your self is as well.

-clap- smart girl

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I'm not actually sure what point you're trying to make here... Are you implying that I'm vain too?
And liking yourself is a good thing. I'm totally in favour of people being happy with themselves. I have problems with people believing that they are better than everyone else. Particularly when they aren't.

So yeah, I'm glad you made the first step and came for advice. The second would be to try to listen to the advice people are giving rather than instantly jumping to abuse mode.

And seriously, what is your first language?

Kal

IN the first place, I would ask, there are so many days, you post your post here and what is the result of all advice now, any change in you or her?

Secondly, what about her look? Has she long hair or short, curly or straight, and what do you like and what is hers and did you ever open your heart about what you say or said here, before her?

There is nothing wrong with wanting someone to look good and take pride in their appearance in my opinion. Like a previous poster said if someone is too lazy to look after themselves then I don't want them looking after my children. With that said it isn't up to you to try and change that person nor should you simply expect it because that's what you want. You can express your feelings and if they don't like what you have to say then it is time to move on.

I think you may have come off to everyone here wrongly. I'm not sure if that is because of the language barrier or not but just try not to take everything everyone says as an attack, even if they do! ;)

You shouldn't want someone to be pretty. If you like her for her personality then she's Georgeous Inside. Everyone is pretty in there own way. If you like her then you shouldn't think about her looks. I have a boyfriend and he's not "hot" But I'm in love with him Hes Everything I eve dreamed of in a guy apart from his looks. Nobody is going to look at you and be like Eww his girlfriends so out of his league. People who judge someone because of who they go out with are stupid. You are quite Shallow who gives a if she's not what you normaly go for. Sake. Your you. Go out with whoever you want tew.

The level of political correctness here just has me stunned.

As a person in a long term relationship (10 yrs, 8 married) I do NOT disagree with the fact that flesh alone keeps things interesting for only a short time. Yes, most people need more than a good lay or a pretty face or a chiseled chest to make it last.

But really... id ask all who have spanked your hand repeatedly about physical attraction to do the following:

1) don't wear makeup. It is a practice that shows you are too shallow and vain to be comfortable in your own body. No hair dyes either.

2) throw out those sexy clothes, panties, and bras. You know sweatpants are more comfy, so why play into the game of teasing others when you aren't willing to let others be pleased by physical attraction?

3) blindfold yourself on dates. Apparently physical attraction is the work of the devil, so own up to it. Tell me that a guy who hasn't showered in two weeks will attract you because he has inner beauty. Try not to gag when you answer.

I am NOT saying that physical attraction is all there is... but come on... this guy signed on to a site for help. He obviously might have some issues about bragging how pretty he is, but really?? That makes him garbage?

Most people are attracted to potential mates by a variety of factors... but those who condemn a person for the physical side should own up and throw their push up bras and their face moisturizers in the trash.

If you pluck your eyebrows, wax your 'stache, shave your legs and arms, you are also tied into physical obsession... its just HIS level is icky and yours is OK.

OK.

Bring on the reddies.

Synnen agrees: Wow. I actually kind of feel bad for shaving, wearing makeup, and having a couple sexy outfits. Good thing I haven't combed my hair today and I'm wearing sweats now to make up for it!

You are naughty and it always makes me laugh!

Seriously, what color are the sweats? Zipper top? Don't be a tease. ;)

Well guys just to let you know I have spoken with her. I made it very clear about my feelings which is. I love being round her. I told her that she sint the typ of person I normaly go out with. And I know I'm not the typ of boy she normaly goes out with :)

Having said that we are both going to try and make it work. She knows my feelings. She said she will do whatever it takes to make me happy. And I really like that, I told her the same thing :)

As I said she understands I'm kind of vain and that. She knows its not the best but she loves me anyway :) how abou that.

As for The people here who gave me abuse. Thanks for reply :) wasn't the best but hey.
I like to think we can all post how we feel and think. And not get judge to harshly but hey I'm into looks apprantly and your into guys that. Well says all the flower typ stuff in movies :) yay to that!

Thank you KP very good points that's my view.

As to the rest.
I know looks are not the most important thing but its really nice to have both isn't it?:)


Regards

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Originally Posted by kp2171

Synnen agrees: Wow. I actually kind of feel bad for shaving, wearing makeup, and having a couple sexy outfits. Good thing I haven't combed my hair today and I'm wearing sweats now to make up for it!

you are naughty and it always makes me laugh!

seriously, what color are the sweats? zipper top? dont be a tease. ;)

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Sweats come in colors other than gray?

And nope on the zipper top---it's COLD in Minnesota! I think I have 4 layers on, and none of them is metal, which would be cold. Duh.

Well more layers are more to peel off one by one...

And cold weather makes you want to snuggle boys for heat when those layers are gone, so its all good near as I can tell.

I'm tired and off topic. Sort of. Done.

Be careful what you wish for. I encouraged my guy to change his outside even though I loved him for what was inside and that changed everything. He got hit on all the time and it went to his head. Turned out changing what was inside to a superficial jerk who got hooked on shallow come ons. I wish I would have been happy with the man I met because now no one is happy.

Great

I think there is a big difference between being vain and just feeling good about how you look. I wear makeup when I go out (I'm very pale and look horrible without it), I have what might be considered sexy clothes (I have terrible self esteem issues and wearing things that look attractive makes me feel better about myself). I'm not young (37), and I'm not a size 2 (more like a 12). I'm my own worst enemy. I think it's great to be able to take pride in yourself, but when you think you are the be all end all and that no plain jane could possibly measure up to you then I have a problem with that.

My ex husband is a pretty good looking guy. He was always being hit on. The day that he married me I weighed 310 pounds. I didn't feel I was good enough for him but he loved me as I was. When I lost the weight I was doing it for myself, not for him, and he was supportive of me no matter what.

Then why is he your ex-hubby?

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Then why is he your ex-hubby?

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After 15 years of marriage we just found ourselves going in different directions. Too many things started to happen at one time that drove a wedge between us. He's still a big part of my life though and one of my best friends.