I want to be there for her though after what I did if I did nc I think it would just make the break up harder for her to get through.

Right now, you have to worry about you. You have to get yourself back on track.

She needs to do the same.

I recommend NC, as well... and that's a lot coming from me.

K I'm sure it will be hard but I'm going to start nc today I got so much tension built up I did 200 push ups so far I think I'm going to do some sit ups as well. I actually think NC will help me get over her quicker.

Good choice-time to look after you and your own needs now.

So I had a little set back she just txted me telling me that she just got done having sex with this guy she is with and she said that he was a lot better then I was. This sets me so far back and I'm not even out of day one of no nc. I feel sick to my stomach any advice on how to not let this bother me?

The thing about NC is that it is both ways: you don't contact her, nor do you open/receive/listen to contacts from her.

That was a low blow for her to text that to you. Down right mean, actually. I'm sorry that you had to read it.

You have to put this girl out of your life.

I recommend going for a drive. You said that you enjoy driving - so go. Go find something new and interesting.

You've got to start taking steps to actively fill the hole that she left when you guys split. You must.

Delete all texts from her without reading them.
If need be,change your number.

Update... Ive been feeling a lot better and been hooking up with old friends that I haven't chilled with for a long time. I've been in contact with my ex and she said she was sorry for what she said. I told her that it was all right. She asked me if we could still be friends and I told her that I would think about it. What do you guys think I should do?

I think the healing process is going to take very long if you remain friends.

I think that would open a virtual Pandora's box on your emotions right now.

I would tell her that, for now, you need to be able to heal. You can't deal with contact from her because it hurts you so much/sets you off/etc.

I don't think it is wise to "be friends" because it leaves you with the hope that "something may happen." Now is the time for healing and dealing with your own issues, not trying to make her feel better.

No,don't try to be friends;you need to heal from the breakup and sort out your own issues now.
No contact is the best way to go.
I'm glad you're feeling better.

K thank you guys so much for the advise. You guys helped me a lot to get through this.

You're very welcome.
Keep posting. :-)

No don't be friends, and honestly, why would you want to be friends with someone who texted you something like that? I mean, I'd never talk to that person again.

K update time I guess.. I've taken your guys advice and deleted her from myspace and Facebook. I don't feel any better yet and I might even feel worse then what I did. I'm hoping that I will feel better in a few days.

You will feel better-as you get on with your own life and get your own routines going.

OK well I'm already feeling a little better I'm thinking I miss her more then being sad. It really sucks when you know the one that you loved a lot is out of your life for good. I think it's the worst feeling I've ever had to deal with. This is my first break up before her I was more of a party kid. I'm already starting to talk to some other girls and they seem interrested in me but they both have kids lol. Not something that I'm really looking for right now. You guys will probably be seeing me a lot because I want to keep my nc going so ill be on here to vent :)

Vent on Ice-it usually helps!
Don't go looking for a new relationship until you are completely over the ex-rebounds are not a good thing.
Make new friends and enjoy life.

Well my friend are all telling me just to go to a party and get drunk and have sex with a chick and that will make me move on and forget about the feelings I have for her what is your thoughts on this.

Nope-bad idea you don't get over someone by bedhopping. That's like booze, only a temporary relief and you'll feel worse for it.
Never mind that you might pick up an STD so not a smart move.

Lol yea I guess your right that its not a good idea to go after the easy women I'm just trying to think of a way to put her out of my mind for good. I may go to the box gym today and hit the bag for a couple hours.

Now THAT'S a GOOD idea!
Go for it.

How am I going to know when it's a good time to date again? This keeps going through my head because I've been out of the game for 4 years.

You'll know. It's not something that you can set a time limit on... it will happen when it happens.

Sorry that that is rather nebulous, but believe me, you'll know. :)

K update... I've been feeling up and down. I don't know why but I think I just miss the comfort of being with someone or maybe I'm scared that I won't ever be able to make a relationship work. But another side of me tells me that I'm better off being single so I can improve myself. I have a lot of stuff that I need to work on... being social is one of them because I'm really really shy lol. I've been being threating by her friends on a normal basis and I pretty much tell them if you got a problem with me then come fix it. They haven't done anything they just keep txting me and calling me like some 8 yr olds or something. I have started to talk to one of my ex's from like 6th grade and we may be hanging out this weekend to catch up on stuff. So I'm guessing life is starting to look up but I still have those down times that I really really hate. I still dream about her which I really wish I could make myself not to but I guess I can't help that.

Ignore the stupid texts-just delete them.
We do anything about the dreams of the exes-getting out of bed and having a coffee and a shower works for me.

Get to know new people,don't start dating until you are completely over the ex.

I'm no sure if ill ever be completely over my ex. I don't see me not ever being able to not think of her. Even after all she did to me I still love her. I mean don't get me wrong I'm making progress I'm starting to hurt less and less everyday. Its just really hard to not think of her at times.

That's normal,but you'll find as the days go by, you'll think about her less and less.
You're getting better and that's the main thing.

K so I had this girl come over and hang out with me tonight and she seemed pretty into me. So now I'm wondering should I pursue this and try to make something out of it or do you guys think its to soon. I mean me and her gets along really really good. I just don't want to rush into things

It's too soon to get romantically involved with anyone as you need to heal from your breakup.

Be friends if you think you can handle it,but going for a rebound relationship is not a good idea.
You don't get over someone by replaing them with somebody else.

Its not fair on them,and its not good for you.

We are just friends she is just getting over a hard break up to so we been comforting each other. But yea I'm pretty much completely over my ex. Still dream about her sometimes but it doesn't bother me as much as it use to. I've been going to partys a lot and just been enjoying the single life. Ill keep you guys updated

Good.
Stick to the friendship and keep enjoying being single.
Best of luck.

Reread some of the post, keep working on you. Its hard to do the work needed when you are young,life is so fastpaced now. You must get your head together so this won't happen again,think how you will feel the next time and she is the one? A hard bump in the road of life, won't be the last but its up to you if it the roughest. The better you "fix" yourself, the easier the next fall will be. You my find"her" and not fall?