I know, I got a question for all of you. What does everyone think about God working in mysterious ways and that we broke up for a reason I know that. But does anyone think that maybe we broke up so we both could grow and learn things so we know for sure we are meant to be each other. Like that quote if you love someone let them go and if they return they are yours.

And LCM yes your story does sound familier to mine. The thing is have you gotten any updates on your ex or anything, and the one thing that we have on our exs that no guys can take away from us is history. Yes, my ex is hanging out with other guys all the time and flirting and texting all kinds of guys cause for the first time in her life she is free to do whatever and not answer to anyone. And I understand she needs space to figure out what she wants in life and learn. But the thing is I need to move on while she is doing this and hope I get another opportunty

Hey pal, I see your struggling a little bit today with this. For the big G - O - D he's a great person, always there, works in mysterious ways, yada yada yada, I believe in God 100% and you can look at what happens to you as God's plan or you can look at it as fate, either way I do believe in God doing things to help us, or in fate working out to make our lives better.

I'm not sure about your last post to my story basically just let her go and try and do better then you man, have confidence in yourself. Look at it this way say you starting dating a supermodel tomorrow, you going to keep that on the lowdown? Heck no, you want everyone to see that, she's not going to let anyone know about who she's seeing because they will probably be like wow, she's an idiot she went from you, to him, yuck.

And for my girl and other guys, I don't care. I don't need to know. Neither do you. Don't hurt yourself, if you find out tonight it'll crush you, if you find out a few months down the road it won't hurt you as much, or at all, and just chalk it up as she's not the person you gave your heart to for years.

Just have confidence in yourself, and keep your head up. I'll try and be here for you through this all pal.

Hey thanks, yes I really am having a tough time today with all of this. I just keep questioning everything and I know what I need to do is move on but can't seem to do it lol. The best bet to get her back is to move on so why am I so stubborn to do so, why am I so stubborn to not let go and let fate do its thing? I was so used to feeling in control and now I don't have any, it sucks is that why I can't move on or is it cause I'm so stubborn lol

Stop thinking about her coming back, just stop, you got to realize if she comes back it's probably going to be when your over her and moved on, or when you absolutely least expect it completely.

Just wake up tomorrow, look outside, smile, and be grateful for your life and everything you have, and had. I promise you it'll pass, and fade, and you don't think it now at all but it's quite possible there's someone better out there for you, but that's your decision when the day comes.

Just have FAITH in your love for one another.

Not quite possible LCM, there is someone better for you out there brad.

Take her off her pedestal!! You need to see the relationship for what it really was and who she really is. You even said she is a completely different person than who you fell in love with. You need to see the reality in all this... not your fantasy of future possibilities, or more than likely impossibilities.

What you have to do now is find some NEW activities that take your mind off her.

Hang out in NEW places. Make some NEW friends. Take up a NEW hobby or sport. Something NEW to keep you from thinking about the OLD. Just stay as busy as possible.

The more you let time do its work, by staying busy, the faster you will move on from this. Not saying it will happen tomorrow... but it will happen.

Brad you have been broken-up for two months... just look back and see how much progress you made from day one till now. I'll bet it will amaze you. Everyone has bad days... but notice how the bad days are fewer and far between now then they were two months earlier. You lived with out her for TWO MONTHS already! Look back on your progress. I bet you will notice how far you have come, and I bet you will feel better.

Your right, I'm not still in the same pain as I was, but it is because I have learned stuff and figure out things like there is NOTHING I can do to bring her back, that I have to move on the first month and half all I did was obsess on how to bring her back, and every effort I got shot down, now its just like if she comes back ill deal with that when the time comes, but I need to move on now, and your right 2 months seems so long ago it really does and at least now I'm starting to do things I used to enjoy once again

There you go! Now keep moving... it can only get better from here.

There you go, your learning!

Yea I know I'm learning, but it doesn't seem to help, I just found out she went to another town to another party that one of my friends is at and asked if I wanted to go. All she cares about it seems like is getting as much attention from guys and getting numbers. It hurts really bad when it seems she doesn't even give a sh*t about you and you care about her

Got any video games??

Do I got video games? Hell you I got video games been logging some serious hours this past week and watching a lot of football with the guys.

Now your talking the good life. Just got Guitar Hero!

Stop getting information man, just let it go tell your pals you don't want to know.

A fan of guitar hero how old are you talaniman. YOU got to love this time of year though football on almost everyday! And LCM I didn't plan on getting that info it just comes out.

I am 54, and my grandkids and I spend a lot of time on Wii! Check out Gamefly.com, and save a lot of loot.

Life is to short to worry over things you can't control, and think of all the cool stuff you can be doing, if your head is screwed on right. Motivate yourself, and enjoy the football games. I mean enjoy everything you do, why not?? I do!

Let's just all face it, tal's the man.

I thought I was doing better I really did, it just seems like I can't get her out of my mind. I know she is out of my life and not causeing me pain, I'm the only one allowing me to cause pain, its just I miss her!

World Of Warcraft

PS.3 grand theft auto

I must admit. Some games just really take your mind of the world. Sometimes it is a good thing

I know you miss her.
You will miss her for a long time

But the pain will go trust me

I don't know, its like she is trying to cause me pain. At that party I was at this weekend she came and talked to one of my friends that she has never met, and talked to him for like two minutes, and already is telling him she should go to her place and party some time. They just met for like 2 minutes but they go to 2 different colleges like 10 minutes away.It's like I didn't mean anythign to her at all!

And she guaranteed that it would be a great time for him if he did come.

Don't let her get to you man. I know... easier said than done. Too often do we let our ex girlfriends screw with your mind. That is just garbage. If your friend is any kind of friend, he would blow her off. Leave her trashy, low class a$$ in the past. She isn't worth your time or your heartache.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by brad321

i thought i was doing better i really did, it just seems like i can't get her out of my mind. i know she is out of my life and not causeing me pain, I'm the only one allowing me to cause pain, its just i miss her!

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Hey Brad... if it makes you feel better... I've been all about No Contact etc. etc... I received two emails recently from my ex and did a great job of not opening them... until this morning. Of course neither gave me anything... and I felt the enormous pain that 4 or 5 stupid words can cause. So even those of us who think we know how to do it... screw up. I felt the pain and boy it hurt. Now the challenge I have is to learn not to do that.

If you were a kid and you burned your hand on the oven... would you run back and touch it again... nope. For some reason emotional pain causes just the opposite... we run back over and over - even though we know how much it will hurt.

Just letting you know you aren't alone this weekend feeling pain. You know what else helps take your mind off the pain ? Stupid TV shows... like the really dumb holiday movies that they show each year...

Hope your Sunday is better than your Saturday buddy.

John what did she want? I just want to be over her, in high school she was a classy girl, like I know I'm 20 but like marriage material, she was so sweet and thoughful and I felt so blessed to have her, and now in less then two months its like who the are you? Who is that girl that I feel in love with? Who is this stranger? I know I got to get my mind off her I think it was just a hard time cause I was home for this week and I have thousands of memories of her so hopefuly when I go back to school it will be better. It just sucks our 3 year anniversay is coming up in a week and then christmas. Whatever I won't worry about that now. I know I'm dumb for asking this but will she ever feel this void that I'm feeling right now, I know she is doing a great job getting her mind off everything by hanging out with all these guys, but will she ever feel the viod I feel or pry not?

Take a page from her play book, and fill the void with things you enjoy as she has.

Just because you don't see her boohooing doesn't mean she isn't. That's your mind playing tricks on you, seeing her pleasure, through your misery. I guarantee, if you get up right now and get busy having fun, you wouldn't be hear crying to us.

Not to be harsh (okay maybe a little) but being in pain doesn't mean you can't do other things, as its about the actions you take for yourself that counts.

Got to go the Colts are on!!

OK talaniman sorry for putting my problems on you guys. I know you guys don't even know me and why would you care about someone you don't even know. I just find it helpful to vent at times I feel better about posting my feelings then I do keeping them in. The thing is I don't want to bother my friends with this problem so I was coming here looking for support that is all, and just to let you know colts suck. You got to cheer for the BEARS!

Brad let it go pal.

And cheer for a real football team like the giants.

Wow I got a good laugh on that one. The giants that's hilarious

Yeah, 11 - 1 hysterical... must be nice to make the playoffs being in the worst division in football, that's cool though.

I'm just giving u sh*t man come on

No doubt pimpin, keep that head up, everything will be All right

I really am trying to keep my head up, today is better than yesterday so that is good, same time this still sucks lol

Update: its been 2 weeks since I've made any contact with her at all. Do I still think about her yes, is it getting easier I don't know, but I feel like I'm healing very slowly

Two weeks isn't that long. It takes a long time, especially if you have strong feelings for her. You are doing good... so just keep the boat floating forward! It will get easier and easier as time goes by.

She will come back dude! Seriously my girl did the same thing to me man about two months ago, and I just got over her and I found another girl that I have a lot in comon, and now my Ex keeps calling me saying she screwed up and she wants to be with me in forever, I got over her and told her to leave me alone or ill change my number because what she put me threw and I do not love her anymore, if you love your girl then you can take her back! Just hold it out!

WRONG!! Do not hold out hope your girlfriend will come back. It may be a cool thing to happen, but it isn't reality. Don't listen to people that tell you that, otherwise you get this stupid false hope in your head. Move on as you are doing... 9 times out of 10, like FMX stated, if they do come back, or by that time, you are over it and have found even more happiness with someone else.

I understand, and who knows if she does come back I might not want her, but for right now I know I haven't learned all the lessons I need to learn quite yet, or made the improvemnts that I want to for my future. But the question I got is fmx how long did you go NC before she came back or she just told you one day that she wanted to try again?

Also fmx how long where you broken up for before she came back?

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He is a bit busy with his own problems.

O all right, I was just wandering didn't mean anything negative about it