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Good.
So what, does that mean your always available when she calls, puh-lease, You are not together so why are you obligated to jump when she rings.Quote:
but we ended things on a good note, with laughs and smiles?
They train dogs to do tricks, men are to dumb to be dogs, aren't they??
Dam, you just set my A$$ straight, good work tal.
Never mind
I was thinking I could text her back.
Were Still cool, I am just, doing me.
And that's it.
Tell her you're busy and you'll call her sometime.
Ok I was confusing myself with the different post. OK this is how it went. She text me "have a good day at work", ani did not reply. Then after a couple of hours she called me, I did not answer. Then again she text me this, "I am guessing you dont want to be cool with me because we are not together. I understand, have a good life." all this happened 2 days ago, all in one day, With NC what so ever. I was thinking I could text her this.
Were still cool, I am just , doing me. Hope your doing well.
What do you think.
Naw!!
DANGIT TAL. You took to long, I already sent it. I just jacked up NC.
same boat here... except different situations =/
Rushing into a decision and not being able to take time to rationally think about what is going on, the implications of your action, and what you want to accomplish is a sign that you are not doing well to get over this.
Next time something happens, if you are going to ask for help, take a few breaths and WAIT. I know the feeling of panic creeping up in your body, you feel your face go flush, you worry, you panic. That is exactly the reaction you want to AVOID when contemplating contact with the ex.
Question... did you read the stickies? Or, do you think your case is any different from 99% of the world.
Try deleting her number from your cell-phone, her email address from your PC, and get rid of all other evidence of her that reminds you around the place.
I double-dare you to forget about her for 24 hours! Because even though you profess to forget and tell us you are working on yourself - you are only fooling YOU - not US. We've been there, done that, some of us more than once and we know the addictive symptoms that you still have.
If you think duct tape and cheese-its are funny, my remedy is worse... a cocktail that will make you barf until your stomach is empty and shampoo to make you wash her out of your hair!
We know you will have your relapses just like any other addict - but for goodness sake - try to control yourself and regain some of that self-respect and look toward the future instead of backwards.
The only time you should act before you think is when you are running as far away from her as you can, so let that self-preservation instinct kick in.. Right about now! Would be a good time.
http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/4/4_14_2.gifhttp://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/4/4_13_1.gifhttp://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_1_6.gifIt's time to think about yourself and moving on...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chery
I did not delete my ex's number since we're just "friends." I do not know what she wants from me...
I deleted his number.. but I know it by memory.. lol... that sux!. any ways I don't call him... I know better than that.. hurts though.. a l0t!. :(
Aj stay away from her... you'll end up hurting more... when she texts u.. txt me :).. lol...
As long as your worrying about her, you can't worry about yourself, and that's not healthy, or attractive to any female.Quote:
I did not delete my ex's number since we're just "friends." I do not know what she wants from me...
*sigh*Quote:
Originally Posted by talaniman
I guess so~
But, I am listening to Gloria Gaynor "I Will Survive" to get myself over the problem.
Quoting one of Talaniman's terms.. Get off the pitty-pot!
You will waste a lot of valuable time trying to figure out what SHE wants.. so figure out what YOU have control over, i.e. new friends, new experiences and a life with peace of mind and not second-guessing her.
Watch some comedies listen to some up-lifting music and go out.
You still didn't answer my last question... did you read the stickies?
Just like any other addict - don't think of your last 'fix' if you want to seriously get cured. And, we will help you on the way to healing.
Keep us posted.
http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_11_2.gifI need a nicotine fix now, so talk to you later.
hjpan... The last post from me was directed toward you..Quote:
Originally Posted by hjpan
I realized too late, that this is not your original thread (from ajhastings), but that you have the same problem. Try your own thread on this subject so that we can take care of each problem from each poster without interrupting the flow. Each of you take different time to heal and need our individual attention.
So, ajhastings... how are you getting along in your healing process?
http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_11_2.gif
In a relationship turmoil, it's not a good idea to piggy-back.
OK, let's keep this thread for ajhastings... and post your own with information related to your personal issue so that we can concentrate our efforts to help both of you without getting mixed up. If you already posted an issue and I missed it, then please post the link so that I can read you from the start.Quote:
Originally Posted by hjpan
http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_11_2.gif
Actually, I am doing very well. The only problem I have is just missing her, that's it. I go out and have fun and meet new people all the time, and that helps. But when it time to go to sleep, or to wake up I start to remember all the things we used to do. I went out last night and that was really cool. And the way the ladies look at you when your happy and full of energy, when they know you just split up, is amazing. But yea. All I really do is miss her, that's it. Buy the ay I think one onf my close frinds are falling for me just after one night. ( dangerous ) I know, not going to go there. But it feels good to be WANTED!! I just remember this sayings "a hungry dog doesn't get fed ". It's her loss.
AJ,
That's all normal. Missing her will vary from day to day, you will have great days and terrible days. It sounds like you are doing fine, keep it up.
That why I am big on coping and healing so you can realistically see what a great time you can have being single, and free to date whom you want, or do whatever you feel like.
Sho me a single person that doesn't love being single, and I'll show you a person that doesn't love themselves enough. Confidence, in a man/woman is very attractive.
I have Accepted, and am officially doing me
Good for you on getting out again. Just don't get too serious over someone else on your 'rebound' stage. You will be going through a roller-coaster but will get our support no matter how long it takes. Time is a key here and you don't have to rush things. Being alone for a while might just help you in not being needy and making better choices in the future.Quote:
Originally Posted by ajhastings88
Good luck,and stay with us.
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Keep strong A.J and guess what,
You're way better than her!
Tell her Viv told you so :)
Well it has been 2 days. She called today (did not answer) and did not leave a message. I have the power. If she wants to come back she will have to BEG. If she doesn't Oh well, her loss. Yea I miss her sometimes, but I reflected our relationship, and she put me through pure hell. She is going to have to work harder than ever to get me back. Many good memories but ebdless heartbreak, Like I said " I have accepted, and am officialy doing me". Im in control now. If she wants me she is going to have to play by my rules. No More mister nice guy.
Well, no mister "doormat guy" I agree with, you shouldn't let her chase away Mr Nice Guy if that's who you want to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ajhastings88
Same idea as me.
If my ex called me to see how I'm doing, I'll talk with her.
If she asks me to take her back, she's going to work on gaining back my trust, feelings etc.
Always go into an old situation with eyes wide open. Some problems may rise back up and that will kill any hopes.
But with that being said, don't hold out hope she is coming back, chances aren't in your favor. Life is short, make mistakes, have fun and enjoy this short life.
True.Quote:
Originally Posted by Romefalls19
I sort of regret losing my virginity to my ex =/
Maybe. Maybe not.
Rome,
I agree with you. When they come back, its rarely the way you intend it to be. Unless some serious work (which requires serious time) has been done on both sides, the same problems will plague you over and over. No time for that!
hjpan,
I don't think that you have truly come to grips with the fact that it is over. You need to get to a place where you can look back, smile on what you had, miss what you had, but know it had to end and know that it is over. You will then know you need to move on, and get better being you.
I hate to say it bud, but you need to let go. It's over, and you are the only one holding you back now.
Ok~Quote:
Originally Posted by bigbird213
I understand.
If you plan on joining the military, talk to people who YOU personally know and ask about the situation.Quote:
Originally Posted by ajhastings88
For me, I have talked to a friend who has been in the Army since 1989.
He gave me a lot of information that recruiters DO NOT tell you~
if you want to enlist, PM me & I'll answer any questions.
I am looking forward to enlist.
Oh no I don't want to do that I was just saying I understand what bird man was saying.Quote:
Originally Posted by hjpan
Quote:
Originally Posted by ajhastings88
Oh OK.. LoL
Well today was kind of a weird day. She contacted me and I did answer. She called a couple dryas ago and I responded to her today. When I contacted her I said "Wassup" She replied "At my sisters wedding". Then a couple minuetes later she text back, " wassup" I reply " nothing" she then replys " So what have you been up to?" I reply " living life, you called a couple days ago, what was up?" she replies " I wanted to know about my college and transcrpit information" ( she should already know that by now) " I then i reply " did you get it situated? She replies "yes" Then I cut it by replying "Good. Well got to go, tell you sis i said congrats" She then replies "K". And that's it. Just a update of my situation. That's it.
That sounds relatively harmless, but you need to make sure you don't get carried away. No doubt your mind is still fragile and wouldn't take much to set you back into the tears and worrying stage...
Looks like she wants a "friendly truce"Quote:
Originally Posted by ajhastings88
Well today was it, I told her that " we could not be cool, or be friends any longer " she said " ok, thank you for letting me know " I said "no problem". Guys I think she is gone for good. I feel kind of good and bad at the same time. I feel like she doesn't care at all. I mean how can a year just be pushed away like a snap of a finger. I treated her like a queen, and she told me her self that she had never had anyone like me before, and that she prayed for someone like me? Weird. At least I am not her little drag along buddy. But damn, she gave up quick as hell. I took her from her lowest times and stood by her side for a year for her. All I asked from her was her trust and her love, that's it.by the way today is her birthday. It was hard being her friend, she is highly attractive and she has allot of guy friends. It was hurting me more being "cool" with her.it's just amazing how quickly she gave up on us. No fight what so ever. Like she showed no remorse.
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