Well get over that feeling. You will not feel any better for making the call.
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Well get over that feeling. You will not feel any better for making the call.
You will feel a lot better cleaning your closet than calling him and dredging up past misery. We all get those feelings and we can't act on them because we know it will do no good. Clean your closet and organise your cabinets. Anything but the wrong thing.
Well, thanks for the advice... I didn't call and I'm so glad I didn't... I'm beginning to a lot less sad... I just hope this is all over soon...
I am so glad to hear that. Keep up the good work.
All the good girls are always with the Jerks what the heck!Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
Well... he called me last night. I missed the call but he did leave me a message, telling me that he just wanted to know how I was doing and to ask me if I had ever try calling him back... now, I have all these mixed feeling again.
Did you call him? I wouldn't call him, let him suffer for once. I know this is hard, and it is a very trying time for you sweetie but you can do this, you have all of us on here to talk to and you have all your friends out there. Remember that!
“Time is one of the essential ingredients. Each day brings 86,400 seconds. Whatever isn't used is gone forever.” Anony..Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
With that being said, live your life, and don't contact him.. People just don't break up for No reason, There may have been warning signs or maybe the relationship was already on the rocks, which it was if he keep breaking up with you. And every time you allow him back you reopen the wound..
No contact is highly recommended it's not how much you do for him But what are you doing for yourself! Besides he needs to get himself together.
“Difficult times have helped me to understand better than before, how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way, and that so many things that one goes worrying about are of no importance whatsoever...”
Isak Dinesen
He can't use you if you don't allow him.. Don't give him too much control.. You be the best YOU that you can be, and because you have loved you must also learn to let go...
He is still the same jerk, he may just be in between victims. Suck up those feelings and keep moving on. Don't give him a second thought.
Exactly... you have come this far Monica , don't go back to square 1.Quote:
Originally Posted by Homegirl 50
He called me again yesterday... then, later on went to my house without letting me know.. the next thing I knew my dad told me someone was looking for me at the door and it was him.. I felt weird! Happy and angry at the same time
He just went to my house to tell me he wanted to be friends how stupid is that? I feel so bad.. I started to feel all those old feelings again.. someone help, what should I do?
Tell him "that is not a good idea and please leave me alone" You don't owe him anything and you certainly don't need to "go there" with him again.
You are doing great! Hang in there.
I agree with Homegirl on this... he had his chance and blew it. If you take him back expect to go through the same thing all over again. People like that don't change over anything less than a near death experience.Quote:
Originally Posted by Homegirl 50
I feel horrible.. =( he went to my house again and he had to show up with bite marks all over his neck..! I felt like my heart broke all over again. I told him to leave that I didn't want to know anything about him and that to forget about me because I was going to forget about him.. I feel so sad! I don't know what to do... I even changed my cell phone # so he wouldn't call me anymore.. I feel depressed
He is a loser and be glad you are not with him. The fact that he would do that should convince him that you are better off without him.
No made the step you needed to take... you got rid of a loser that wanted to use you. Keep up N/C give it a month or two, hang out with your lady friends and after a few months the pain will subside then you start looking for a new guy friend. And use what you learned from this loser to avoid his type again. Don't make the mistake many women make. Chasing after the same bad boy type that treats them like dirt, over and over again.Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
is it normal to fell as though this was my fault? I feel horrible... I feel so sad =(
what should I do to stop this feeling ?
Don't you start blaming yourself! You didn't do this, he did this to himself! You deserve so much better then that jerk, how dear him show up at your house with bite marks on his neck? Let me guess he got into a fight with a vacume? Hes a LOSER stay away from him, good for you changing your cell phone number. You will meet a nice guy soon enough!
Yes its normal, but its not all your fault, build a life without the ex, and learn to love yourself. That and time, will heal those fresh wounds in your soul.Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
Ever since I saw him the last time I've been feeling really sad. I can't eat, I can't concentrate and when I'm asleep I dream about him... I've been crying too much and I don't even want to go out anymore... I feel like I'm depressed! I don't know how to get him out of my mind. What should I do??
Find something to do that makes you happy, and time does the rest. Click on the links in my signature for some good suggestions.
Ignore the guy.. focus on other things. If you insist on going back with him, or someone like him then it becomes YOUR fault. Because you know he's like this and you chose to ignore it. Up till now its been his fault.Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
Like I said... hang out with your lady friends. Take up a hobby. When you get over these feelings then its time to move on and find someone new, someone different, not someone just like him.
I've been feeling a lot better now that I have no contact with him... finally!
I've been going out with a new guy and I think I'm starting to develop some kind of feelings for him... I think about him a lot and when I'm with him I feel good again =) I'm just not sure if he feels the same for me... he kissed me already and we've gonne out a couple of times but I don't know.. what should I do about this?
I would take it day by day with this new guy. Don't jump into things too fast... you don't want this to be a rebound type of relationship. You will know when and what to do, your feelings will dictate that. Just take it slow :)
Well I found out that my ex is now calling my house! I don't know what to do anymore! Why would he call after more than a month and what he did to me?
Don't worry about the why. Continue to ignore him. He'll get the message.
Honey, your post is a textbook definition of what "being used" means. Glad you are no longer in that situation.
As for this new guy? Take it slow. Realize that you're a unique, special, wonderful person and that you are worth the best. That "perfect guy" will know that, recognize that, and treat you like the princess you are. Don't worry.
Good luck! :)
Don't respond to him... if you can do it look into call blocking if you have to.Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
You have nothing to say, so block his calls, and that sends a message. Your done with him, and his antics.
well now I've been having a lot of dreams about him! =( mostly every night and I wake up with either a headache or a backache! It's weird! And not only that but I when I don't dream about my ex I dream of the new a guy I'm sort of talking to! I'm so confused! Why I'm I having these mixed dreams?
He is calling your house so he is still on your mind. That does not change anything. He is still a jerk and you are better off without him.
Hang in there, this too shall pass.
I'm sorry to say but that guy, obviously did not like you. It's hard to get over a relationship that lasted so long.But the truth is you need to move on because he did use you. :(
You're analyzing dreams?Quote:
Originally Posted by mon3yca15
This guy you described sounded a lot like me. I was exactly this way to a girlfriend I had about 10 years ago. I didn't really love her, but I did like her. She went out of her way for me, did everything I asked, was a total GODDESS to me. I was just a friend to her... very unfair.
Anyway, I broke it off with her also after 5 years. No excuses, just that I didn't want to be with her anymore. She chased after me and kept after me, which made me feel good. I kept tabs on her, and as long as I knew she wasn't seeing anyone, I did OK.
Then, when she started dating someone else, I got really jealous. She treated me like a GOD, and now she's dating someone else? HOW! She's supposed to be stuck on ME! So I tried and tried, and I got her back... only to dump her a couple weeks later. I kept toying with her over and over until one day she finally got rid of me and didn't talk to me or respond to me, etc. Which was good on her part because I would have kept playing with her.
So based on my experience, and your story, and what's been going on recently, no he doesn't want jack squat to do with you, he's just jealous that you can move on. He's jealous that you don't look at him like you used to. Women have more emotions than men, and men have this uncanny ability to use that against them. DON'T FALL FOR IT! You have a good thing going by being with someone else. He already broke up with you 4 times, remember? How many times do you have to go through it all before you learn! Wake up girl!
well I kind of already knew that he didn't love me the way I loved him! Sad but true! =( but I just want to know why all of the sudden I'm having dreams about him ? Is it because he's calling my house and looking for me now? Why do I feel so confused?
and for Eura, did you ever regret doing this to this girlfriend you had and wish you were with her?
He is on your mind because he is still bugging you with phone calls. That's all there is to it.
I agree with Homegirl - My last (defective) relationship caused me to change my phone number AND get a new provider. It was a drastic measure, but I couldn't handle the constant reminders of what was. Change that number!
Well it's been a long while since I last saw him or even spoke to him and I still feel really bad... I feel like I'm falling apart! =( I think about him a lot and even me going out with my girl friends is not helping... I feel really frustrated with myself I don't know what to do anymore! He's even in my dreams , I hate that! How much longer before I start feeling like myself again.. anyone?
Don't know that there is any set time. It takes a different amount of time for everyone.
Remind yourself that he is no good for you and you are better off without him.
Don't put yourself back in a nasty situation just because you're thinking of him.
Look forward... not backward. You got past numb nuts. Don't turn back now.
It takes a while to recover from the trauma you have been through, sorry you can't rush the hurt and pain away, but be patient with yourself. It will get better.
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