Ask Me Help Desk - Nice guys finish last

That depends on whether you've confused "nice guy" with "doormat." Nice guys never finish last but doormats always do.

Quote:

Originally Posted by huno

False.

Nice guys aren't even in the race to begin with.

That's not true. Can't you be any better and be more positive?

I think that nice guys are the head of the race! Unfortunately there are girls that like bad guys. But not all, seriously, not all of the girl like @s. U might be looking at the wrong place.

Its not that we like jerks, it is just shocking to us when the man we are with starts acting like a jerk. The reason why we become clingy to them is because we are trying to figure out how a person that treated you so good for a long time can suddenly become a jerk. I love nice, sweet guys that do not have an ego the size of mount everest.

Quote:

Originally Posted by E3317

when I mentioned that more than half of what molds a man into what he is, is determined by what a woman wants people laughed at me. Because of the fact that women are so into the bad guy we have a increase number of "bad Guys". No knock on women, but if they simply refuse to accept these bad guys then the nice guys could possibly finish first, and women will no longer need to say, where are all the good men.

I think that some of this response has some interesting truth to it. I think a lot of the 'bad boy' Jerk types are so high in number because of the way some women are attracted to them for their personality traits. I think that sometimes people try to be something they are not, so they self mould (if you like) their own pattern of behavior to satisfy what they think is attractive to the opposite sex. I think it boils down to immaturity and I don't believe for one second that women want a bad guy but I do believe that the characteristics of a bad guy or wild guy or jerk can be attractive to the younger women (NOT ALL). These types often display self confidence and the arrogance that can sometimes come with it (even if false). These men are no stronger than anyone else but may have learned to display themselves differently to the opposite sex to increase their chances of success. I think a lot of it is done without the individual really knowing, kind of subconsciously and is not (for the most part) premeditated. There is a lot of pressure for younger men to display masculinity in today's society and especially among their peers for fear of being seen as less of a man. This is where being who you are, being yourself is the best thing to be and where you will really meet your match. This does bring us back to maturity and both men and women do a lot of emotional growing in their 20's (for example).

I also believe that there are women out their who genuinely want a nice guy but have met so many t**ts that they find it hard to trust anyone or even believe that there is a genuinely nice man out there for her.

I would like to emphasise the words genuinely nice man as I believe also that there are men out there who pose themselves as nice guys and turn out to be bad eggs. Seen plenty of women fall for that trick.

There are players and there are good people and this goes for men and women, just as there are jerk types in us men, there are jerk type women too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

Unfortunately, it's true.

But it doesn't mean that nice guys should become bad. :p

I think we girls like nice guys better, but somehow we're more attracted to the other 'types'... :rolleyes: Again, unfortunately!

nicespringgirl disagrees

nicespringgirl, agree or disagree, it's still my opinion!
Thanks!

True, us nice sweet, loyal lot haven't a hope against a bloke who slags off his girlfriend, and talks openly about how he had her last night with his mates, what luckly lady wouldn't have'um hay (roll eyes) lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by cld1979

I think I have fallen into the trap of being a 'nice guy' - and it hasn't done me any favours!

I tend not to realise until after a breakup that I have done it. It's not intentional, but I am a naturally caring person. This ultimately turns me into Mr Nice Guy, who texts all the time, and worries about her all the time. After the break up, I realise - but it's too late!

One day I will learn my lesson! One fine day! LOL

Certainly, nobody is suggesting that you be something you're not or that you stop being yourself. However, are you really a "naturally caring person" as you bill yourself or is that a cover-up for insecurity and a constant neediness? To find out, just compare how you treat your love interest with how you treat the other people in your life (family, male friends, etc.) Do you text them all the time and worry about them all the time? If so, then fine, that's just your nature, although you may then need to make some changes in that regard so that people don't regard you as an overbearing pest. On the other hand, if the constant worrying and texting only occurs between you and your current love interest, then that's a sign of neediness and insecurity and that's always a big turn-off. You're going to have to change these habits if you ever want to have a successful relationship with anybody.

I think to sum up what I believe to be true. As women grow older and mature emotionally and have been through there exploration years i.e. <25 then the Nice, caring, genuine guy becomes more appealing, not always but a lot of the time.

Nice guys finish last is a statement used by someone who has been rejected or felt rejected and has grown to resent rather than embrace the qualities that they hold. Look in the mirror, would you really want to change anything? By the way, I'm not referring to the poster of the question specifically, this is just a general question in which we should ask ourselves (whoever we are LOL).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Geoffersonairplane

I think to sum up what I believe to be true. As women grow older and mature emotionally and have been through there exploration years i.e. <25 then the Nice, caring, genuine guy becomes more appealing, not always but a lot of the time.

Nice guys finish last is a statement used by someone who has been rejected or felt rejected and has grown to resent rather than embrace the qualities that they hold. Look in the mirror, would you really want to change anything? By the way, i'm not referring to the poster of the question specifically, this is just a general question in which we should ask ourselves (whoever we are LOL).

Great thought! I like what you have said to this post, but your username kind of bothers me, sorry, no offense, but what does it mean and it's so long... does anyone think the same as I do??
Thank you, hun.

Depends e-n-t-i-r-e-l-y on the ethics level of who's doing the judging.

Being straight up in business with all my customers has served me very well. I can look back at three or four times I got screwed by unethical types. But that's out of hundreds of deals and projects.

As to females: Let those who prefer the rowdy promise-breakers have 'em! They'll pop out a kid or two (or get a couple of abortions) and end up at 45 wishing they had chosen the decent, considerate guy who comes home nights, didn't spend the paycheck on a new Chevy Dualie, or blow it in a high-stakes poker game at the lawyers club. (Rotten guys don't have to be low-IQ Neanderthals. They can come from "the best families." )

And as for us decent guys... there's nothing that says we can't stay fit and learn some brutal self-defense... just in case a trouble-maker starts something the decent guy can't talk his way out of. (Hap-ki-do is good because it incorporates submissions as well as kicks and punches.)

Sorry to tlak so long. Great question!

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

Great thought! I like what you have said to this post, but your username kinda bothers me, sorry, no offense, but what does it mean and it's so long...does anyone think the same as I do???
Thank you, hun.

Why does it bother you? It's just a username.. LOL

My name is Geoff and for some reason, I was given by friends and family a joke username and it stuck with me for years as Geoffersonairplane. Its nothing to do with the 60's band. It's not really supposed to mean anything.

Perhaps it means Geoff>>erson>>is on an airplane and wants to fly far away to the sunny mountains in the south of Spain.

Or it might just mean $**% all. LOL

I've seen a lot worse on here I can tell you.. LOL

By the way, I did not take offence.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Geoffersonairplane

Why does it bother you? It's just a username..LOL

My name is Geoff and for some reason, I was given by friends and family a joke username and it stuck with me for years as Geoffersonairplane. Its nothing to do with the 60's band. It's not really supposed to mean anything.

Perhaps it means Geoff>>erson>>is on an airplane and wants to fly far away to the sunny mountains in the south of Spain.

Or it might just mean $**% all. LOL

I've seen a lot worse on here I can tell you..LOL

It's that type of name that I can't remember but I can "rememeber"! U got it?
Well, then what's the sleeping tiger about?! :confused:

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

it's that type of name that i can't remember but I can "rememeber"!! u got it??
Well, then what's the sleeping tiger about? !!:confused:

I like Tigers. I think they are beautiful creatures.

Why are you analysing everything about a username and an image of a tiger sleeping. I can tell you that this Tiger is not an image of me (at least not the last time I looked in the mirror)

Sometimes things have no meaning but are simply an expression.

:confused: :confused:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Geoffersonairplane

:confused: :confused:

Just tease you sweetie;) because you sounds d*mn smart! I like to talk to you, how is that? :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

Just tease you sweetie;) coz u sounds d*mn smart!! I like to talk to you, how is that??:p

Well, that's very nice of you and I am very touched by the comment. ;)

Must be love ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by zooropa1985

must be love ;)

:D maybe, maybe not

She was missing huno earlier... :D

I don't do blind dates. LOL

We're just kidding.

Who does blind dates anyway?

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

We're just kidding.

Who does blind dates anyway?

I know... LOL

Cilla Black used to host a show called Blind date here in the U.K. and would get 3 contestants to compete against each other for their blind date by coming out with corny one liners in response to the blind date's question.

It was quite funny to watch.

Quote:

nice guys finish last.True or false?

False, as its the ones who miss the fun who finish last.
In the end
the nice guy wins.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

:D maybe, maybe not

She was missing huno earlier... :D

Ey, ey,ey... are you my friend or not?? :confused: :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by Geoffersonairplane

Well, thats very nice of you and I am very touched by the comment. ;)

Aw... sweetie, my pleasure. I do enjoy your comments, very in depth and thoughtful. Hugs:o

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

ey, ey,ey...are you my friend or not ???:confused: :p

I didn't know it was a secret hun... :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

I didn't know it was a secret hun... :)

Now u know... -_-#:mad: :D

Dam no one misses me :(

Lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by zooropa1985

dam no one misses me :(

lol

Hey~ sweetie, I do,I miss you, hun!;) but don't you tell this to GEOFFER.. plane(whatever his name is)! :mad:

Ahh thanks, you made my night

;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

Hey~ sweetie, I do,I miss you, hun!;) but don't you tell this to GEOFFER..plane(whatever his name is)!!:mad:

Now you miss everyone (except me) and it's not credible anymore :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

Now you miss everyone (except me) and it's not credible anymore :p

That is because u told GEOF... PLANE-tiger face-no blind date that I miss Huno!! :mad: Now u see the cause and effect:D

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

That is because u told GEOF...PLANE-tiger face-no blind date that I miss Huno!!! :mad: Now u see the cause and effect:D

That's fine. You've made zooropa's night. :D You've put a little smile on someone's face. The rest doesn't matter.

As for huno, I don't think he cares. He would be here now if he would... :rolleyes: Bad huno! :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by zooropa1985

ahh thanks, you made my night

;)

So how you going to make my night then? ;) Hey, why don't u tell you why you stare at a chick and what do you think when you are staring at her? :rolleyes:

Quote:

Originally Posted by kristynn

Now you miss everyone (except me) and it's not credible anymore :p

I miss you krissie, and I'm fully credible

(die hard 4 peeps July 4th! )

Quote:

Originally Posted by zooropa1985

I miss you krissie, and im fully credible

(die hard 4 peeps july 4th!!)

Canada's Day was yesterday...

I know you miss me, but now you need to give us the EXCELLENT ANSWER to that question. :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by woh337

so how u gonna make my night then??;) Hey, why don't u tell u why u stare at a chick and what do u think when u r staring at her??:rolleyes:

Hmm how am I going to make your night, well I got cornflakes lol

OK when I stare at a chick its usually because she is hot and I'm interested in her, sadly though I tend to look away as soon as she makes eye contact, then I spent the next 5 minutes beating meself up for not talking to her

Dam my shyness!!

:)

Quote:

Originally Posted by zooropa1985

hmm how am i gonna make your nite, well i got cornflakes lol

ok when i stare at a chick its usually because she is hot and im interested in her, sadly though i tend to look away as soon as she makes eye contact, then i spent the next 5 minutes beatin meself up for not talkin to her

dam my shyness!!!

:)

Aw... hun... hugs... :o but are you sure you won't stare at ugly chicks?? :confused:

Thank you hun!

P.S. I honstly look at both ugly and hot guys, I don't why... so I am curious if guys stare at ugly chicks too

Quote:

Originally Posted by zooropa1985

ok when i stare at a chick its usually because she is hot and im interested in her, sadly though i tend to look away as soon as she makes eye contact, then i spent the next 5 minutes beatin meself up for not talkin to her

dam my shyness!!!

:)

In this case, is there anything the girl you stare at can do to make you feel less shy, not look away, and most of all not spend the next 5 minutes beating yourself up (I guess this happens each time you stare at her, look away, etc. right?)?

Better yet, is there anything she can do to help you out and so that you can go and actually say something to her, instead of JUST staring? :rolleyes:

Ugly chicks - hmmm that's a good question but then again how do we describe ugly? I mean one persons ugly could be anothers beauty.

I think what makes a person stand out from the crowd is a unique feature, sadly this means that the said person could be ugly to one person and hot to another.

It's a fine line to walk and maybe what I'm saying makes no sense.

But to answer your question I wouldn't stare merely peek :)