It will be when you find the love of your life

Sheebsta, I think you're showing a lot of character. Apparently what I said struck a nerve with some posters here, and that's okay. I think you sound like the kind of girl who values a good friend when she has one and that will come back to you in spades, like good Karma. I'm sure that when you do find the love of your life (which you aleady know this guy is not), he will fit you like a glove, and he won't be someone you have to feel guilty about dating cause he will be, oh I don't know, available.

While I do understand that it's not necessarily an evil deed to have a crush on your friend's ex, if they are still friends, and they may even still have feelings for each other, why go there. Is it because you're not supposed to that makes it all the more attractive to some people? Or is it that any attention, even from a friend's ex is better than no attention at all? It's a big world out there with a whole lot of fishes, why not keep fishing?

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Originally Posted by Raynefreak

Well thing is its no law that says you can't date a friends ex. Persoanly i think if both have been single for awhile and kind of moved on, sure date who you want. I think its stupid to say that if ur friend dates a guy that's off limits to anyone else dating him. If i had this prob, if my friend liked a guy i broke up with a few weeks or month ago, id say, if u really like him. Ok. Sure its an odd situation, but ppl like who they like. That's life. Move on. It's just kind of silly to me that someone would ruin their happiness b/c their friend is too immiute to let go after a month. That guy isnt going to stya single for life lol. Come on. .and this sounds like a hs prob. W/e do what u what in the end i just think its silly to not date who you want. I dont need to worry im engaged and been out of school for 4 yrs.

But w/e she dont like him i am just saying

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Raynefreak, I'm not saying that this guy has to stay single forever, he can date tomorrow if that float's his boat. What I am saying and most people will agree is that out of common courtesy (not that you're not, I don't know) most people won't date their friend's exes because it's not worth all the grief for a fling. That's what they usually end up being, flings or worse, rebounds. And ruining your happiness, I think that's a little dramatic wouldn't you say? We don't have to scratch every itch just cause we feel like it. If dating your friend's ex has the potential of ruining a friendship or causing rifts between people, it's not worth it. I've seen it happen many many times. It complicates things. Maybe it doesn't make sense since they are exes, but that's just the way things are, most people would be bothered by it.

Well I was just making a point to make a point. I personally think that its not a bigg deal if a girl dates her bff's boyfriend after awhile. Sry I didn't say awhile. I'm also sorry if I sound like a biotch. I don't agree w/ people cheating and hurting other's feelings. But I wanted to make my point. Just my opinion. I hope its better understood what I meant. I think its anoying that everyone is giving me disagree's. Mainly because I was giving my opinion's, but to keep disagreeing is just rude. (no name's) But I wish people would just comment with the opinion's then disagreeing right away. Now I feel like everyone thinks I'm a biotch or bad person. I can't put myself in this position, I don't have any friend's atm. But no one know's me, so w/e. I try to give advice. So I'm sorry that I am bad at it. Im so sorry. :-(

Rayne, Puuhhleease woman! No one thinks you're a B or anything else. We are all entitled to see things and think whatever we think. We agree to disagree here, that's okay. We're not experts, everyone here is offering to help in the way they know how, and it's up to the OP to sift through it all and decide if what we said was helpful or not. Yeah, it is annoying to get a little red box in your remarks folder, but it just shows that we're all different, that's all.