Ask Me Help Desk - Possessive And Protective Little Brother.

Brother or not she has no legal standing as a minor to give consent to anything a doctor has to do for her brother.

Do you think you could have him open up about his past without it resulting in a fight? I have a feeling that his insecurities, fears, jealousies, etc. are a result of a tragic and perhaps traumatic childhood. Maybe he is trying to protect you from the same harm that was inflicted upon him as a child, but his approach is totally out of line and causing more damage.

On the other hand, it doesn't sound right that he's asking to sleep in the same bed as you. Why can't he just sleep on the floor in the same room if he's that concerned? Why the same bed? If you were little kids this could be something easily overlooked, but the two of you are teenagers! I say this is a major indicator that things could escalate to something highly inappropriate.

Secondly, we don't really know if the fight that resulted between your brother and your boyfriend happened because your boyfriend really is no good, or because your brother is a controlling person by nature. It sounds like by your main question that he is, in which case you have a right to defend yourself and ensure that your brother doesn't inflict any more harm to you or anyone else that is connected to you. So I suppose it doesn't really matter who provoked the fight or if your brother did you a favour by getting rid of the guy or if he did you a disservice. The fact of the matter he is letting his possessiveness impede on your life and his attachment is straining the relationship you have as siblings.

I understand that you may want to protect him because he's your little brother and your parents are not able to do most of the things they had promised to do for you, but for the sake of your sanity and perhaps your life, you must resort to somewhere safe until your brother gets the required help he needs. Otherwise, I am scared what this may mean for you and your immediate future.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Silver Lining

It might not be her responsibility, but he is her brother,,,, not some stranger she met on the way,,,,

She's also 18, and she's not old enough to have to parent a 16 year old boy. This is a parents responsibility, not a child's.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

She's also 18, and she's not old enough to have to parent a 16 year old boy. This is a parents responsibility, not a childs.

Of course it is not her responsibility, it is her parent's... but their parents' are not around and she is the only family he has,, unless someone takes some action, he will not get the help he needs,, u don run away from the problems, you face them,,

It is better to seek help than ignore the matter and let it take its course,, if her brother is possessive/protective/dangerous/rapist or whatever it is that everyone is predicting, he deserves a chance to be heard.

IT IS NOT HER RESPONSIBILITY,, but he sure is her brother and they were very close as kids AND he needs help, which she can give. She can take him to a psychiatrist, or a psychologist, or to some adult/guardian who can help them both. Leaving him at his fate and leading your life is not humanity, neither is it what family does... her parents might be insane to have left them on their own, but she shouldn act like her parents and leave her brother,,

Also, the OP hasn't replied after the first few posts... is she still active?

Is there any way for you to communicate with your parents while they are away? Email? Phone? You should talk to your parents about this and see what they say, if not your parents then your neighbors.