Will I ever move on from my ex of 7 years? Help :(
I was with my ex boyfriend for 7 years. We fell in love when both of us were 14. Its been 8 months now since we broke up. We drifted apart so bad, I was in another Uni so the distance its too wide to be fixed. Since we have been together for so long, the sparks….its gone. But being apart hurts so bad. We gave each other hope that we will be together in the future. “youre the only one I love forever” that sort of thing. So it made it harder. We have the same circle of friends, so we always see each other. The longest duration I haven't seen him was for a month. I cried almost everyday for the first 6 months. I got to know that he's seeing someone new, but yeah he was in the transition of moving on. I don't like going on dates with other guys until I met this one guy I used to have a huge crush on. We have been seeing each other for 2 months then my ex found out about it, he couldn't accept the fact that I like this dude and I'm dating someone new. I have been waiting for him to come back to me to commit and try it again. He did come back but he said he doesn't want to hurt me anymore. It crushed him then he found out that I'm coming home for good since I'm doing my internship so we will be so near to each other. He wants to be with me, but I know it will be the same **** we've been through and I really like the new guy. So I didn't reply to any of his messages. Until………I found out that he was admitted in the hospital! He broke his ankle. I was devastated when I found out because none of us never been admitted in the hospital before. So I rushed to the hospital and wanted to see him so bad and there he was and with the same girl he's been seeing for the past 4 months. (now his girlfriend) I was worried sick even though it hurts to see him I went to the hospital for him. For him. I met his parents and I felt so sad because it could have been me with him right now by his side. It broke me, it turned my life up side down. I hit bottom rock and back to square one. We talked to each other for a bit and he told me he wanted to be with me, but I didn't reply so he decided to move forward because he thought I was in love with the new guy and he doesn't want to waste the potential he has with the girl so he chose to be with her since I ignored him. I cried like a baby, I couldn't take it. I know he loves me so much and I will always be his number one. He told me it could have been me too in the hospital with him but yeah everything happens for a reason. Ive been crying for the past 4 days because seeing him with someone new it hurts so badddddddddddddd. Im back to square one, now I don't feel anything towards the new guy, Im so lost. I don't think I will ever move on….Hes the love of my life, my true love. I cannot be with other guys because I just cant. I choose not to open up because I'm scared I will hurt myself and the new person. I just need some advise. I don't think I'm going to go for the new guy I don't want it to be a rebound relationship. I don't need a guy to make me happy because I have my friends and family. Its heartbreaking to see someone you love, love someone else. Please help what can I do to really move on and start living in the present. Its killing me inside. I now know too much Im going to suffer till the end of time :(((((((((((((((