@Joypulv : I agree with you, that I need to break up, but thoughts of him, memories with him and the way he has imprinted on my daily life is pulling me back from going away. His messages that he loves, I'm very precious to him and his tension , makes me want to comfort him and go back to him. Every day without him is getting heavier, but I also agree with my mom , that this relation won't be a two sided happy one, and the sooner it ends the better, it was cause us lesser pain. I am caught up between two forces, one giving me reasons that this won't , and the other giving me a hope that things would change if I gave it a second try.

You have to consider that he's already gone through 6 other relationships, and more likely than not, those relationships didn't work out, for the same reasons that this is not working out for you.

He is emotionally unable to contribute, in a healthy way, to building upon skills that he should have already learned, to make your relationship with him, a loving one. For each failed relationship, there should have been learning, changes, insight, resolve to understand faults, shortcomings, and accountability, in order not to bring to the next relationship, all the traits that caused the other relationships to fail.

Can you say that he's learned anything, or provided insight to you, that would show he has matured and is capable of admitting where he went wrong, either in his past relationships, or with you directly. Does he ever admit fault for slipping into that place where he becomes moody, judgmental, argumentative, and accusatory toward you. Does he ever apologize for not handling relationship problems by deflecting accountability onto you (or others), and not accepting his responsibility. Is he able to identify specific traits that keep repeating themselves, that always leave you both in the same place, without any mutual agreement or resolve to work on specific problems. Does he acknowlege your feelings, and how his negativity contributes to you continuously having to start over and over again with him, and regardless of what you do, end up in the same place.

Relationships are hard work. If both people possess the traits, desire, and commitment, to make the 'love' part work, and thus build a relationship foundation, and are able to demonstrate, by their actions, the building of that foundation for clear and achieveable goals (ie marriage), then in that situation, with that kind of mutual attitude and desire, there is great hope for success.

But, where the needs of one, always supercede the needs of the other, and the relationship has not yet resulted in even the solidifying of the first layer of concrete on the foundation, you are left filling the cracks, and never reaching the stage where you can finally start building on that foundation. It is too weak, and with only the actions of one, building and being responsible for all the construction, where it should be equally the work of two, not only is progress slow, but the ultimate goal of success seems more and more a daunting task.

A second or third promise by your boyfriend to even pick up a shovel, never happens. There are no breakthroughs, or efforts on his part, to figure out what stops him from turning 'love' into the successful building of a relationship. He does not have mutual goals with you, he has different goals. If he worked for me, I would have fired him, because he's costing me money and eating up profits by not doing his job.

Love happens when two compatible people's needs are met. And when their needs are not met, there is never this foundation, and never enough mutual effort to address any problems. Where one party is willing to work hard to overcome all the problems that arise, and the other remains emotionally unable to reach that point, and/or is unwilling to, then the imbalance in the relationship is such that, the relationship will go nowhere.

Love, falling in love, being in love, maintaining love, is more than a 'feeling' or 'state of mind'. It is only one part of a much, much larger picture. It is only the beginning, the building of the foundation, the starting point.

Sometimes, love, is just not enough.