I understand, I guess I'm just afraid of losing her and never getting her back in my life. Its hard and I will be strong and have nc, just have to wait and see if she will ever contact me, as I move on with my life. I really do love this girl you know, besides all the emotion I do. And I'm doing all right, hopefully she will realize from the time she has alone that I can change for her and want to. But if she doesn't then its to bad. I told her I was not contacting her again I will respect what she wants as a man. But that I loved her no matter what, and miss her etc. She is starting a new job this week working with children and she told me just doesn't want to stress, because dealing with kids is stressful. And I guess she would get mad because sometimes I would fool around or just if I tried to talk to her and she didn't want to that would make her mad. But hey she know's I'm sorry and she just wanted me to give her what she wanted and I slacked a little bit, but she knows that I'm a good person and knows I would do anything for her. She just needs her time and space to see what she want's in her life, which I have to do with mine. I just hope she never forgets me before its to late.
