i feel as if God has left me, every since my ex left me
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first I would to say is this website has helped me out a lot. And I'm greatfull that people help everyone. I'm a catholic, a proud one to, just everysince last summer a lot of stuff has been going down hill for me, before my ex ened a year and six months reliship. My health wasn't very well during summer, I was always stress due to a summer class I was taking the only time I rember where I would feel peace was with my ex, in the moring I would take her to her driving lesson school, we would wake up early I would take her for breakfeast, everymoring, we would laugh and hug, then I would drop her off at the school, then I would head to my class, for about four hours everyday, I would pick her up at 12pm we would go get lunch sometimes with her mother, still have agood laught huge, and she would run towards me and say I'm glad God gave me a boyfriend like you and one I would want to marry. Many of our peers thought we would get married. We rarely fought if we did we would tell each other sorry and we would see if we could fix it, we would usely. But then I started having very bad nightmares. Of her been tourted and my sister as well, it seem so real sometimes, I would only get about 30min of sleep for about 2 or 3 months, I never told her cause I didn't want to worrie her and mess up her chance for college, she new something was wrong with me, but I didn't want to put a burden on her, since her grandfather was dieying at that time, may he RIP. I wish I could have been their for her more during that time, I would offer to take her food to the hospital, but I wasn't really myself now that I look back, I would have very bad days, like I would be grumpy, but I would tell her I was sory, that I was going throu somestuf, I was about to tell her about my knightmares, and some other problemds I was having, with my family that I had two close family friends about to die, I was under so much pressure that time, I didn't know what to do, and I didn't want to worry her, it was a mistake I made, then when she dump me I guess she thought I was stalking her, which I wasn't, I would bump into her at random, I didn't even know she was their, and she thoguht I was stalking her, I gave her space, but then my cpu went all weird, and sent her an email that made me look crazy a poem I was working on before we broke up. I was chaning it to make it look more as a friend thing, but them my cpu sent it to her on accendent. One day the mother called me and asked me if I was still datin her. I told her no, she ended it, the mother was shock, then she asked me if their was anything she could do that would help me, I asked her if I could get a pict of her my ex and the father, since her father passed away, I wanted to get her a crystal foto for her for xmas,I asked the mother not to tell my ex, but I guess she did. Then people started to spread talk that wasn't true, but my ex would still call me. Just to cheak up on me, she was worried once when she called, I really don't know what happan. Some one screwed me over, and now it has been around 7 months since the break up and we haven't really talk. I would want to talk to her but don't know what to do, I haven't really talk to anyone about this only mayb my two close friends and that is all. I would want peace between me and her, patty my ex is the one who holds all the cards it is up to her,
