The only reason I felt qualified to answer is I believe I have been where you are. I recognise what you are doing by having done it myself. And what I learned (and painfully too) I shared with you here. If you don't feel that is applicable, so be it. But that does not change or diminish what I experienced. I eventually found a way to be more honest with myself which resulted in a less competitive approach to love. It was then that I found who I have been with for almost two decades now -- happily married for the majority of it.
I hear you think you finally have a shot with this guy. You're happy about that and seem pretty compelled to go for it. But can you ever be secure knowing deep in your heart how you "got him" and what if someone just like you comes along and sets her sites on him? That is food for thought, like it or not.
While its okay to disagree that any of this fits your situation, please know that I believe our posting here is only with the best of intentions, especially since we do it for free. My hope for you is you learn whatever it is you need to to find love and happiness regardless if that makes my answer the "right" answer. You deserve to be happy. I never questioned that-- just the path you're taking to get there.
