No I don't give my money to him, I have rent to pay kids to feed don't have money to give him.
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You're in a very sticky situation. You say his marriage was an 'arranged" marriage. That prompts me to ask where he's from. It sounds like he's from a non-western culture and possibly one which practices polygamy. I think you now realize that counting on him to be your "rescuer" was a mistake and a bad reason for jumping into a new relationship. What you need to focus on now is providing for your kids the best you can. You should take legal action against the fathers of your daughters in an attempt to get some child support. You may need to start with your state's welfare agency.
Saying your marriage was arranged is often a ploy by a cheater to get the girl to feel for his bad situation.
The way I see things is you need some help from a counselor, but more so from a lawyer, to get you to the legal point of defining his responsibilities, and give limits to his access to you, or your kids. Visitation is fine for a dad, but it must be on mutual terms than he has to respect, and obey.
Showing up unannounced is not acceptable, and its controlling.
As far as counseling goes, I must admit, that I think your on the right path to independence, but some guidance, and support, would be just the thing to have when times get tough, or he acts a butt hole.
Just curious as to the relationship with his family. Do they support you or are they only on his side?
Are you still estranged from your own family?
His mum has been very supportive of me because she knew what happened with my family, I lived with a family until I turned 15 that's when I found out they were not my real parents, they treated me different to their own kids I should have knew from then.
All I know is my mother passed away and I don't know anything about my father.
Do you think his mom can get him to back off? Does she know you want to end the relationship with him?
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