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That is the message you send, by feeling guilty, and going back! Your way to dependent on this guy, like a junkie that needs their dope no matter what they have to do to get it.Quote:
Originally Posted by chuff
Yes he does know that your hooked on him.
I'm sooooo peeed off!! My boyfriend split with me 6 days ago saying that he no longer wanted to be in a relationship. Which I just couldn't believe, but any how I carried as best as I could.
Today I found out that on Sunday he went all up to manchester (which takes a good few hours) for a drink!? His mates girlfriend claimed, I don't think so!!
I know for a fact he went to meet some girl, as last time we split he was massaging an calling some girl called emma from there.
It just hurts soooo much knowing that I mean nothing to him and that he's meeting this girl so soon after we broke up.
I was doing fine with the NC before I found this news out, an it just hurts so much, I thought that in time he might would want to get back together but this has just gone to show he never really loved me at all, and that he was still in contact with the girl even when we got back together, I just feel like I've been lied to an cheated on the through the whole of the relationship.
Thinking back now it all makes sense. On his birthday he went to manchester with his mates, and I know one of them cheated on there girlfriend because he slept with my old mate, she was even on his myspace and Facebook, and her number still in his phone even when he told me he had deleted it. I feel so stupid and that I wasted 4 years with him, thinking I would be with this guy for the rest of my life.
It hurts knowing he's moved on so fast, so well with out me. I was doing so well getting over him, now that news has thrown me back, takeing me back to square one :(
Hey sweety,
I know it hurts badly but is he worth your tears.. he has moved on with his life. You mentioned that he is seeing (mite be seeing) another girl,, then why waste your feelings on him? I know its very hard, but get on with life. There are many fishes in the ocean,, better ones,,
Judging by your words, I feel you are very young... look sweety,, life is long,, wait for the right one,, heartbreaks will come and go, but once you find your Mr.Right, everything will be like sailing on cloud 9... until then, be strong,, don't let some guy hurt you,,
I have been told that God has to balance everything in life,, if God has given you tears,, he has something better in store for you,, you just have to wait for it,,
It is natural, but it is life. The good news is that it has hit rock bottom, and the rebuilding can truly start. You had some sort of false hope all along that he would come back to you, and you can NEVER rebuild and truly move on without first letting go of any hope of reconciliation. It is over, for good. Now you have your closure, now you have only YOURSELF to worry about. Good luck!
I was completely surprised when I received the text, but also a little happy?
He said that I have left a top at his and asking me how I am, and that he's always here for me? Also because I have been going to the gym he said he would buy me a dress when I lost some weight, but that was when we were together and he said that he still owes me one?
Is this my ex trying to come back into my life? Or just being nice because he wants to be friends?
We had NC for a week now this? An he was the first to contact me.
My answers were straight forward and to the point and saying I don't want to act as mates because we're not. He replyed saying that he because he lost his job and everything he didn't know were his head was at, but I just don't know what to do, I feel really confused and back to were I started when I was doing brilliant.
I don't know what to think, I don't know what to do?
Please help
x.x.x
My ex did the same thing. She said that she didn't want to leave off on a bad note. Maybe that's what your ex wants as well. I recently came to the conclusion that I don't want my ex back anymore and I choose to see her text as just a friendly thing and with no intention of rekindling the relationship. After the text I went back to no contact. Things have been going great so far. You said you were a little happy though, are you wanting to get back with him?
I really care for him, he meant a lot to me as we were together 4 years, but I just don't know what I want anymore
I was just happy that he had got in contact with me because it was no that he was thinking about, and had been thinking about us.
But I don't know if I do want him back though?
He didn't say he wanted to get back with you. I think he is getting back in contact with you because he is conflicted due to him losing his job. He might have gotten back in touch with you because he needed a shoulder so he wanted you to be that shoulder. When your bored your mind wonders.
I don't want his texting you to give you false hope and to be honest I wouldn't read too much into his text nor pay him any mind.
He could be feeling low right now but what will happen when this feeling leave him.
I say continue doing what your was doing before he got in contact with you.
Maybe you should go back to no contact until you figure out what you really want. He'll still have memories of your relationship and sometimes he may feel inclined to contact you, as he probably isn't completely over it yet. Take some time for yourself and figure out what's best for you though.
Sounds like he's going through a rough patch and he's confiding in you. You've only broken up for a week. A week ago, the person he probably confided in the most was you for the last 4 years. So you can't completely change your habits so quickly.
It doesn't necessary mean that he wants to get back together. I still really care about my ex and have no problem helping her out, but I wouldn't want to get back with her.
What matters is how do you feel about him? Do you want to get back together? Do you want to stay friends? Do you feel like you've moved on?
I think we need more details about how you feel about him and what type of relationship/friendship you want with him.
Since it's only been a week, it's tough to answer these questions. But if you don't want to get back with him and you haven't gotten over the break up yet, it's better if you continue the no contact until you heal.
I would like to get back with him, an it sounded like he wanted to get with me.
Then we spoke on the phone, and now its like ita taken him back to us being friends, when a minute ago we were saying that we had something special?
If you want to get back with him, then why did you break up in the first place?
He said he no longer wanted to in a relationship.
But he's now said that he didn't no were his head was at, at the time with him just losing his job and stuff?
I Got laid off a week prior to my girl dumping me. I can say that I was pretty depressed about it. I knew it was going to happen for like a month and I wasn't in a very good mood. It does effect a person.Quote:
Originally Posted by owenk
Instead of trying to guess what his intentions are why don't you ask him "what do you mean".Quote:
Originally Posted by owenk
However, I still think you should go back to your NC. You don't need this confusion in your life and this is all he is added to your life right now "confusion".
Ive been split with my ex for about 1 month, we were together for over years, he says we drifted apart an always falling out over silly things with which I agree, however I loved him so sos much I really wanted to giv it one last go but he never wanted to. We tried a little to be mates but I always wanted more. I was with him since we were 18 and now coming 23.
Today we had the biggest fall out ever, I lied and said some untruthful hurtful things which he now knows was all llies, he came to my house shouting calling me every name under the sun, until my dad had to come to the door and call him in to sort this out.
He wanted the things he got my back so I said OK I'll bring them later, I was so upset an angry with everyfin he had been saying I cut up the 2 designer bags he got me and all the jewellery. A little while later he phoned saying why we like this asking to meet me to talk properly, but its all to late, when were were together or when I wanted to be with him he never wanted to talk then when it really mattered he hurt me so much I told him I don't want to know.
I went an took his things round hopeing he wouldn't be in he was so I went out his house, his mom seemed off with me an tried to close the door with me in, I went out the house and could hear him calling, he then came and chased me an grabbed the bag off me with the cut up items I looked back an could see him looking I was soooo scared I walked fast and rang my friend who was on her way to pick me up, then phonned my mom which he soon ran up to me going mad so I told her to come pick me up to, then he snatech the phone out my hand, telling me to say sorry an walked off with it back to his telling me to go to his which I was to scared to I waited for my mom told her then went to his his mom was going mad I saw I complete different side to her, nasty and mean he was being just as nasty an hurtful everyone trying to make me look like the bad one my mom callled the police about my phone being taken then after some arguing an sillyness he threw it outside and said go get like the dog u are lol so I did and went to the car, my mom still at the door broke down started crying an his mom rubbing her back, I just wonder if we would ever get over this when we are older because as silly as it sounds I do love him, and wish it never had to be like this, because he said he loves me and wants to be with me but we fall out over sillyness I just say because we are both young, an both our first serious relationships, I really don't know what to think and if I'll ever get over him because I would have done anything for him, and he's wrecked my life takeing away my work experience at uni, telling his mates girlfriends sillyness so they all hate me and I just don't know were we, I will go from here?
sorry guys for it being long I'm at rock bottom right now x x
This sounds unhealthy. You need to cut all ties, and start no contact IMMEDIATELY. In time you'll get over him, and find someone that is worth your time.
I agree. You need to move on without him.
It won't be easy, but DO NOT get in touch with him again.
Give yourself some time to get to know yourself and let the pain from this relationship dull.
Please keep all your questions regarding the same issue in the same thread. I had to merge your threads so that we can follow your story.
This has been a particularly LONG on and off relationship.
You broke up for a reason every time. If you can't fix the problems that broke you up in the first place (in this case, mutiple times), then you're just going to end up breaking up again and again.
Fate is telling you something. You don't belong together. Don't force something that isn't meant to be.
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