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-   -   How do I deal with my boyfriend going to a strip club? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=34059)

  • Sep 14, 2006, 02:02 AM
    chuff
    I don't have any facts to back this up but I believe most strippers are either bi or lesbian anyway. They see your boyfriend as an open wallet.
  • Sep 14, 2006, 07:56 AM
    talaniman
    You need to work on your jealousy issues, Have you sought counselling? You really should if a little thing like a bachelor party upsets you.
  • Sep 14, 2006, 07:00 PM
    s_cianci
    Upon coming to the realization that the two of you live together and have for 3 years, I agree with kp (couldn't spread the love) ; the whole strip club thing is just a red herring. There are some more fundamental issues here. Frankly, I think 3 years is way too long to be shacked up together and not have tied the knot ; that's red flag #1. You're going to have to sort out a lot of things here if you want this relationship to be successful. Communication is key and there needs to be lots of it.
  • Sep 20, 2006, 06:41 PM
    DizzyLizzy10
    Okay this actually just recently happened to me...
    My boyfriend and his best-friend turned 18 within the same week and decided to go to a strip club.. I was completely okay with this... for some odd reason. But when it happened I got extremely jealous because just like you said I pictured him with naked women all around him... and it made me feel sick. I was upset about it for a while but then... I thought about it and I know he wouldn't "do" anything with one of these strippers and guys are visual people... they will always enjoy looking at other women.. no matter what you do. It's not because they don't find you attractive or they find them more attractive... it's just how they are. The only thing I can tell you is to just relax about it... and know that a stripper is just another "pretty girl"...
    And... they aren't always that attractive
  • Sep 28, 2006, 06:22 PM
    crankytwinkles
    I've read the posts above and I understand what they are saying but I agree with you. I don't think there's anything right about going to a strip club especially when you are committed in a relationship. I was in my best friends wedding party years ago and they all voted to go to the strip club and I said I wouldn't go... and I never did. I did get bumped down the line but I guess that was the price I had to pay. I honestly don't think there is anything right about being committed to someone and going to a strip club. I don't care if its for a bachelor party. Respecting the one you are with is more important. I'll never understand a bachelor party at the strip clubs... so it's the last time they will see naked ladies before they get hitched... hmmm... maybe they shouldn't get hitched then.
  • Sep 29, 2007, 06:11 PM
    BigAl1957
    Ok sweetie, it depends. Either go with him or drop him. My goodness.... lighten up... if you can not go with him and have a great time, then you guys are doomed. So either be is partner and have fun; or try to be a control freek mother type and then after 3 to 4 years when you have not saved him and/or made him reach his potental he will leave your for a girl who will be his partner and have fun with him and not try to control his life..
  • Oct 11, 2007, 05:37 PM
    stuntedspider
    Oh OK the same thing happened to me! Oh god the stress. He went after lying to me about it, hmm no trust now, are still together. But I went out that night to and got v drunk in london which was near to where he was, luckly for me after enjoying himself for an hour lol he came to the club to see me partly because he was worried! Lol worried I wld cheat he's just as bad as me, he said it was really anti social all his mates an himself were ed hopefully that lacks his memory of it and he never saw the groom. He saw me because he said it was really seedy and pervy men everywhere the dancers looked OK but way too much make up. He saw my point of view but had to go for a stag, why do men want to see naked women and have a women touch him before he gets married, last night of freedom right? Well why don't you just have sex with someone to celebrate. It's a waste of money and yer why have a burger when you have meat at home, to be honest doesn't seem like a big deal to men does to us as well lets put it this way would they be OK if we stripped for a man? Hmm x
  • Apr 27, 2008, 10:49 AM
    hshin06
    Comment on crankytwinkles's post
    Please marry me :) you're perfect.
  • Oct 25, 2010, 08:27 AM
    legslegs
    I've been in the same position as you before, my partner has been to strip clubs in the past with his brother and his brother got married in augest and I made him tell me if they were planning on going to a strip club or not and he said as far as he know's, no. I knew what his brother was like and I couldn't believe it, I had to look on my partners phone to find a message "the girls are on at 8.30" I knew exactly what it meant and I confronted it with him and I told him I don't like the thought of you going to somewere like that and while your with me please respect that, he wouldn't like it if we went to male striper place rubbing oil all over them! I think personally maybe on this occasion let him go but if he then started going on the regular I wouldn't be happy at all! It makes us girls fill so unatrractive.

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