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-   -   Girl talks to Ex-Constantly (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=316133)

  • Feb 11, 2009, 02:50 PM
    Justwantfair
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by proudpole48 View Post
    I mean there is alot more to the story then what i put on here, i guess what i am trying to figure out is if there is any advice on how to get through this is this going to be like this forever or am i eventually going to forget about it...i know i'm dumb but i do believe her when she says it's nothing

    This is like the third time that I have heard you call yourself dumb, that and this decision shows no respect for yourself, I think you have some self esteem issues that are causing you to cling to her and accept this behavior that is UNACCEPTABLE from a wife.

    If you have self esteem issues your relationship will continue on like this because you are her personal doormat.
  • Feb 11, 2009, 03:05 PM
    slapshot_oi

    From seeing 3 separate girls who did this, and two I didn't even like... you're wasting your time with this broad.

    She ain't showin' you respect so you're obliged to return the favor. Just walk out with no explanation.
  • Feb 11, 2009, 04:01 PM
    CrazyThumper
    Proud- she is breaking a lot of rules of love here man. Why would you want to work through a marriage where she has no respect for you, you can not trust her, she hides things from you, her HEART is still with someone ELSE. I'm all for wanting people to work through bad times, and issues that can be dealt with- but come on man.. she is walking all over you and it will continue. Why are you staying with this woman? I understand you married her so you feel you have an obligation to her for life- but uhm... it takes two to tango man.. and she already has one foot out the door. Sitting there as her puppet is surely not going to lead to a happy and healthy future :( Good luck man.
    THump
  • Feb 11, 2009, 04:13 PM
    Romefalls19

    Wow, so you are letting her disrespect you in such a bad way. Let us know when you want to pick your b@lls up off the floor. I don't see how you can allow this, she loves another man. How are you okay with that?
  • Feb 11, 2009, 04:21 PM
    neverme
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Romefalls19 View Post
    Wow, so you are letting her disrespect you in such a bad way. Let us know when you want to pick your b@lls up off the floor. I don't see how you can allow this, she loves another man. How are you okay with that?

    Exactly!

    How can you possibly be OK with this?

    Grow a pair and strap them on.
  • Feb 11, 2009, 08:00 PM
    De4rest

    If she is not willing to work hard in this marriage, trying to leave her past behind and start fresh with you, how can this relationship will ever work out for you??

    In the end, you are the one who will be very tired and feel used. Discuss about this matter with her. Tell her firmly that you don't deserve this kind of treatment from her no matter what her reasons are. If she wants to try to work it out then that's a good start. However, if she never start making progress, you should watch out and decide again what's best for you.
  • Feb 11, 2009, 08:04 PM
    N0help4u

    Messing with his head would be walking past him with her man in her arms and looking happy! She is messing with your head,
  • Feb 12, 2009, 05:29 AM
    artlady
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by proudpole48 View Post
    I mean there is alot more to the story then what i put on here, i guess what i am trying to figure out is if there is any advice on how to get through this is this going to be like this forever or am i eventually going to forget about it...i know i'm dumb but i do believe her when she says it's nothing

    It is very much something and for some reason you are in horrible denial.

    The only way to get through this ,since you are going to allow this horrible treatment is to resign yourself to the fact that you are sharing her affections,and who knows what else with another man.

    Are you eventually going to forget about it? I suspect she will continue to have both of you as you seem to be O.K with it,she has no reason to stop.Until such time as she makes a choice and then just dumps you completely.

    It is beyond my understanding why you would allow and accept this type of treatment,unless you are swingers and even then there are rules of the game.

    No one deserves to be treated this way and you need to ask yourself if you want a lifetime of such treatment.
  • Feb 12, 2009, 05:52 AM
    talaniman

    You let your wife carry on with an ex in this manner?? Confront this and tell her you know everything and its time for her to go. Somebody better leave as this is UNACCEPTABLE!

    You need help, and lots of it, if you trust someone you know for a fact is doing WRONG by you! Wife or not.
  • Feb 12, 2009, 06:04 AM
    ardahk

    I am shocked. In comparison to some problems on here and some things people can't deal with yours make them seem insignificant.

    YOUR WIFE?! She tells her ex that she misses him and loves him and you sit there doing nothing - there is no mutual respect in this relationship, no real trust and it will end with you being very very hurt

    You need to get out mate, all of us loved those who we were with but all decided to leave. Granted this situation is a little different as you are married but its also all the more reason for you to get out, you two are husband and wife 'til death do us part' and she is on the phone to her ex, it is really beyond me how you stick through this - you are just blinded because you don't want to be alone, you think you are still with her but if you just take a step back and think about it, you really really aren't. Was she like this when you were dating?

    Get a one way ticket and don't ever come back
  • Feb 12, 2009, 06:07 AM
    chowder3

    This is a pretty harsh board... proudpole, you said that there's more to this whole situation what exactly is the more??
  • May 2, 2009, 05:28 PM
    makapuu
    You have said a few negative things about you girl's ex. Just think of what he's saying about you? If your girl talks to him every day, she must have lots to say. Do you think she's telling him how happy she is with you?

    I lived that situation from the other side. My boyfriend's ex girlfriend used to call him and tell him how her new boyfriends are lacking. She would then ask him out "as just friends." She certainly didn't respect her new boyfriends, or me.

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